P-Fag
Sep 30, 2007 2007 Season, Awfulness, Demarcus Faggins sucks
After last week, the pro-Petey stance was that he had matched up with great receivers and, thus, had no chance. Well, he’s in the process of getting meat-shanked by Harrington and some no-name wideouts, and he has two PIs and two holds. In short, he’s playing like someone who sucks. Because he is someone who sucks.
So, new rule at DGDB&D (which, I believe, is our first and only rule): Excuses and/or praise for Faggins are verboten. Seriously.
G.O.A.T.? Hardly.
Sep 30, 2007 2004 Draft, DeAngelo Hall, Demarcus Faggins sucks, Dunta Robinson, Overrated, Posts that list too many players, Teams that aren't the Texans
I wanted to get this up before the game starts so it doesn’t seem like anything other than what it is.
With the Saints on a bye this weekend, the crown of “Most Overrated Player in the NFL” fits squarely on the head of Falcons CB DeAngelo Hall. Of course, ridiculous columns like this one don’t help.
Perhaps the only other cornerback consistently mentioned as one of the top players currently at the position is Champ Bailey. Both Hall and Bailey have tremendous speed which allows them to cover a lot of ground, but they also tackle very well. While Hall may be thrilled to be mentioned on the same level as Bailey, he’s still aiming to become the outright best corner ever.
I don’t even know where to begin. How about the idea that Nnamdi Asomugha is widely considered the best or second-best corner in the league by anyone with an ounce of sense? Seriously, the ONLY people who sincerely believe that Hall is one of the best corners in the game are Hall and a handful of myopic sports writers. Thankfully, and despite the constant crowing by Hall, the stats don’t bear out the claim that he is anything special.
Consider:
Hall (165 tackles, 13 INT, 22 PD, 2 FF, 3 TD, 0.5 sack) is not even the best of the first round corners taken alongside him. Dunta Robinson (267 tackles, 11 INT, 35 PD, 5 FF, 1 TD, 4 sacks) and Chris Gamble (215 tackles, 16 INT, 22 PD, 2 FF, 2 TD, 1 sack) are both arguably as good or better than Hall, yet no one is trying to say that either of them is best in the league.
“But wait,” cry the Falcons fans, “teams AVOID throwing at D-Hall because they are afraid of him because he’s so good.”
Um…
Dunta Robinson–targeted 80 times last season.
DeAngelo Hall–targeted 87 times season.
(Chris Gamble was not among the 20 most-targeted)
So, in a season when Dunta was playing across from a host of random fill-ins and a hobbled Petey effin’ Faggins, teams threw at him less than they threw at DeAngelo. Also, the Texans were thrown at a total of 505 times last year… and teams chucked at the Falcons 515 times, so you can’t use the “teams threw at the Falcons a LOT more, so that’s why DeAngelo had more targets” defense, either.
What about the idea that he shuts down great receivers? Well, he had a good game against Smith last week (until Hall opened his mouth), so there’s that. But, what’s that saying? Even a blind fat chick finds a pie every now and then. How did he fare against big name receivers in 2006?
Marques Colston–7 catches for 97 yards. Hall had one tackle. Advantage: Colston
Larry Fitzgerald–4 for 71. Hall had INT TD. Advantage: Hall
Hines Ward–8 for 171, 3 TD. Hall had 3 tackles. Advantage: Ward
Chad Johnson–6 for 78, TD. Hall had 2 solo and 3 assisted tackles. Advantage: Johnson
Roy Williams–6 for 138, TD. Hall had 3 tackles. Advantage: Williams
Santana Moss–7 for 123, TD. Hall had 2 tackles. Advantage: Moss
Terrell Owens–5 for 69, 2 TD. Hall had 8 tackles. Advantage: Owens
Wow. Amazing.
*cough*
He did manage to hold his own against Braylon Edwards (3 for 31, TD) last year, so he’s got that going for him. Then again, Braylon still found the endzone, so maybe that wasn’t a total win. And the immortal Hank Baskett lit him up for 7 catches, 177 yards, and a TD. Not surprisingly, 2005 wasn’t much better for Hall, either, as he got lit up by Terrell Owens, Steve Smith twice, Darrell Jackson, Donald Driver, and Laveranues Coles. Plus, let’s not forget the “I own 85″ shaved into DeAngelo’s head before the preseason game against the Bengals, wherein Chad made Hall into a SportsCenter punchline.
Someone help me out here. WHY is Hall ever talked about in the same sentence as “best corner” unless the words “unequivocally not” are also involved? Because, to my mind, about the ONLY way you can make an argument for Hall being one of the best is if you use a bunch of quotes from DeAngelo Hall.
Am I the best complete corner in the game? Yeah. I don’t get beat for touchdowns which always gives us a chance to win. I make tackles when I have to. So I definitely think I’m the most complete corner in the game.
Please–and I think I speak for everyone, here, including Falcons fans–shut up.
A fool’s errand
Sep 28, 2007 2007 Season, Demarcus Faggins sucks, Dunta Robinson, Preview, Stats, Teams that aren't the Texans
I’ve been anything but subtle about my feelings for Petey Faggins as a starting second cornerback, so I debated whether to even comment on the latest Chron article regarding him. I mean, I’ve slowly come to the realization that I am preaching to the choir here.
Besides, the article is hardly ground-breaking; most of it says exactly what you’d think it would. He’s a hard worker. He tries not worry about what people say about him. Dunta likes him. The coaches like him. Blah blah blah.
There are some parts, however, that deserve a response.
[regarding Faggins' performance against Harrison] Hoke said, “He didn’t get in the end zone all afternoon or go over 100 yards (gaining 53). I’d call that a ‘win’ for Petey.”
The next person who uses that excuse is getting a turd in the mail. Seriously. First of all, Faggins did not only cover Harrison. Sure, Marvin was his primary guy for the afternoon, but Faggins also gave up catches to Wayne and Gonzalez at different points. If we are counting total yards he allowed, those need to be figured in. Second, in Marvin’s 53 yards was a pretty huge catch for a first down when the team absolutely, positively needed a stop and Petey was playing too far off (more on that in a minute). Third, and this is most important, while Marvin may have not gotten in the endzone, Petey was out of position and/or missed the tackle on BOTH Joseph Addai TD runs. BOTH OF THEM. So, no, Harrison didn’t score, but Petey didn’t exactly prevent TDs when he had the chance.
Asked why Faggins frequently appears to give the receiver excessive wiggle room, Hoke answered, “Some of it is by design.” But he also conceded, “There were plays (against the Colts) where we were playing zone technique and he kind of carried it over to man coverage. So, yes, in those situations, he got too far off.”
And it didn’t occur to anyone to mention to Petey that he was playing too far off in man coverage for nearly the entire game? No one noticed this until after the fact? Or was he told and he just didn’t listen? Telling us that, yeah, he screwed up, does not really answer the questions when he was continually screwing up. Or was the only play where it wasn’t “by design” the one catch by Harrison that basically ended our chances of winning the game? And why the hell is “too much wiggle room” part of the design (other than “because he can’t play man coverage without it”)? These are all legitimate questions that no one with access seems to be asking.
Faggins tends to suffer by comparison with Robinson, a former first-round draft choice who may be on the cusp of becoming a Pro Bowl-caliber corner. Most teams shy away from attacking Robinson, opting to pick on Faggins instead.
Actually, Faggins suffers by comparison to pretty much ANY starting corner. And don’t give me the “teams avoid Dunta” spiel, please. Dunta was the 13th most frequently targeted DB in the league last year (84 times). Now, considering Faggins was out much of last year with an injury, wouldn’t it stand to reason that the guy replacing Petey would be targeted at least as much as Faggins, if not more (because, after all, he’s backing up a starter, so he has to be worse, right)? Stupid facts getting in the way of nice, cushy excuses.
Hoke, however, doesn’t see as much failure there as others might, noting how one of Smith’s TDs, on a ball Faggins’ had tipped, was the kind of play All-Pros are wont to make. “Petey thought he’d tipped the ball away,” Hoke said, “but then Smith comes around behind him and finds a way to make the catch. Bad luck. Not everyone could have done that.”
Fair enough–not everyone could have found the ball and caught it. Spare me the “he tipped it” crap, though. Look at the replay and you will see that the ball hit Petey in the head and bounced away. It hit him in the head because he was late turning back to the ball. Had he turned back in time, Petey could have easily (one assumes) knocked the ball down and averted the TD.
I feel like I am beating my head against a brick wall here. I can see he’s not good. Most of you can see he’s not good. The opposing teams CERTAINLY see he’s not good. The stats bear out that he’s not good and that his fall-back excuse of “targeted more” is crap. Yet, all we hear is that he is better than our alternatives. But, considering that we haven’t exactly tried Fletcher over there (or signed a free agent), how the hell would we even know if that is true? Forgive me, but I don’t buy into the “because the coaching staff says so” reasoning.
So, my only question is, when Joey Harrington is going after Faggins and finding success, what excuses will we get then?
EDIT: I should also point out that in no way do I enjoy seeing Petey fail. If he steps up this weekend and dominates, I will certainly not think “well, crap!” If anything, I would like to see him step up his game and establish himself as a true CB. I am just not going to hold my breath waiting for it to happen.
Rosterfarian
Sep 27, 2007 2007 Season, Lundy, Preview, RB free-for-all, Samkon Gado cured cancer, WR
I got so wrapped up in the weekly prediction post (which, by the way, are quickly becoming my favorite things to write) that I forgot to mention the team added TE/LS/ST Joel Dreessen and WR David Anderson to the active roster.
Now, while I was hoping for Charlie Adams because he’s 6-2 and relatively fast, I suppose David is a solid enough addition for the short term. He had one catch last year (27 yards) and 3 kick returns (30 yard average), along with three catches and on TD in the preseason. Of course, he’s also a 5-10 /196 white guy with a 4.53 40. Which is another way of saying make sure you temper your expectations accordingly.
Dreessen, aside from having bizarre back-to-back double letters in his last name, theoretically takes the place of Cedric Killings as a widebody who can run well enough to play special teams. He is also a long-snapper, which will be handy if Bryan Pittman and Jeff Zgonina die unexpectedly.
Just like a lot of people, I assumed that part of the roster additions this week would address the horrific running game that Jameel Cook and Sam Gado proffered last week. The theory is that Ron Dayne is going to be able to carry the load this week (and it’s not like the Falcons run D is much on tackling), which would make RB less of a priority. Unless he can’t. In which case we will either see Cook resume getting the bulk of the carries over Gado, which will make me scream at the TV, or see Gado assume the role of primary back, which will likely make me scream at the TV. Whither Wali Lundy?
Random tangent: Part of the non-Lundy stuff I’ve read this week has said he’s “slow.” Lundy, of course, ran a 4.43 at the combine. Gado ran a 4.68. If Wali is slow, Gado is best described as glacial.
I have a great idea! I’ll get an average looking chick with a 73 IQ to make videos with me!!!
Sep 27, 2007 Houston Chronicle, Idiot Karaoke, Righteous Indignation, Theft
Well, isn’t this interesting? It seems that John McClain, Anna-Megan Raley, and two or three other Chron people have done a song parody, “Big Bad Schaub” (to the tune, obviously, of Jimmy Dean’s “Big Bad John.”)
Hmm. I could swear that I’ve recent seen song parodies somewhere else. Where was that? Oh wait…that’s right! I did them under the heading of Idiot Karaoke! And, if you’ve been reading this site for more than two weeks–in which case, you should know that Homeland Security is likely watching you–you probably noticed the “coincidence,” too.
Am I saying they stole my idea? No, not directly. I am suggesting it as a possibility, however, because I think it’s curious that just over two weeks after my first parodies of old country songs, the video maven and his vapid lap dog decided to do a parody of an old country song.
Could it really be a coincidence? Possibly. But, when you consider that in their hours of videos, they have never–to my knowledge, at least–done a song parody of any kind, it seems a little more than coincidental. When you combine this with the fact that BRB and Fanhouse linked to the original parody, “I Blame The Line,” and that the post received a good reaction from pretty much everyone, I think I have to call shenanigans.
To be fair, as Stephanie pointed out in an email to me, Chance McClain is an actual musician of some sort and has written songs about the Texans. Fair enough. In my mind, however, that makes my accusation even more likely–if McClain has access to a musician, why did it never enter his mind to do a parody song about a player until right after I did it?
As I see it, there are two possibilities. First, McClain and Anna-Tard put their heads together, sorted through the insipid spew that Anna-Megan likely offers, and totally independent of this blog decided to parody a–something they’d never done before–and it just happened to be both an old country song and soon after I had done that exact thing. Possible, I guess. Second, one or both of them saw my parody and thought it would be fun to do the same, so they enlisted the help of Chance McClain.
Think I am paranoid and crazy? Maybe, but look at it this way–if Tim or Scott or Stephanie or Texans Gab or Texans Tailgate started doing parodies of old country songs about players, it would not be a stretch to say that they stole the idea from here. Why should McClain and the Chron people get a free pass from suspicion just because he whores himself out on video with regularity? Occam’s Razor, bitches.
So, do I care? Only a little. I like the people at the Chron in general. (After all, they did link to my edited mirror of this blog and put it on their main Texans page. That was cool.) At the same time, I have heard from a couple different emailers that some of the Chron writers have talked some smack about this blog being “not funny,” “rude,” and/or just written “to get a response.” OK, so maybe the first two accusations are true, at least to some people. But the third? Blow me. I am nothing if not transparent here–I sign my name to everything, I cite sources on nearly every story I write, and I don’t write anything I don’t believe myself (though, in cases like the “we should sign Simeon Rice” post, I was drunk at the time). So, to the extent that some of these people have taken exception to what I am doing here, I take exception to the idea that someone would so blatantly steal an idea. A little recognition, like a fucking hat tip or a “we saw this here and thought it would be fun to do one,” is not asking too much.
[Final side-note: I know that McClain and his posse did a remake of "The Night Before Christmas" last December. I do not consider that as evidence that they didn't rip DGDB&D off because (a) that's a fucking poem and (b) it's not a classic country song.]
UPDATE: Paul mentions that McClain has been talking about this song for “weeks” on 610. If his idea predates 9/14, then I fully admit that I am wrong. (About the song; I stand by the idea that Anna-Megan is less-than-adequate at best.) Of course, he might have also stole it from an 80s Oilers record, but whatever. Anyone know when he first mentioned it?
SECOND UPDATE: So, it seems, I jumped the gun on this. Fair enough. I am man enough to admit when I am wrong.
Born in the slob. His father was a muddah.
Sep 26, 2007 2007 Season, Fuck the Cowboys, Predictions Guaranteed To Go Wrong, Teams that aren't the Texans
Because I am nothing if not slightly OCD and because my work schedule is such that I spend hours on the internet doing nothing, I frequently check the SiteMeter to see how people are getting here. Generally, it’s from links or from bookmarks or even from Google searches for things like “Reggie Bush overrated” or “Filipino tranny porn.”
Yesterday, however, I saw that someone got here by searching for “Results of nose piercings good and bad things that could happen.” Huh? I have no idea how you got here with that search, but allow me to help you reach an informed decision. The list of good things that can happen is pretty short. It reads, “You get your nose pierced and it does not get infected.” The end. The list of bad things, however, is noticeably longer. It includes everything from “hepatitis” to “being rejected by potential employers” to “getting it caught on a zipper as you seek affection from other men to compensate for the love daddy never showed you.” Bad times all around. So, long story short, I would advise against the nose ring and would instead suggest a tattoo of your current boyfriend’s name. Because we all {heart} Brad.
Last week: 10-6
Season: 30-17
Week 4 Picks
Byes: Tennessee, New Orleans, Washington, Jacksonville
JUGGERNAUT @ Atlanta. OK, you’re a dude. (Female readers, just try to imagine.) Now, imagine that you’ve been seeing this girl off and on for a couple years, but you feel like she is just stringing you along. You know that she’s also been dating a guy who is all wrong for her and she’s even gone so far as to cut certain friends out of her life if he didn’t like them. You still like her. You still say all the right things and go through all the motions because you think you want to be in a more serious relationship with her at some point. Then, one day, she basically tells you she doesn’t want to see you anymore because she is so completely smitten with the other guy and she can’t have you around making things difficult. Now, I ask you, once that ne’er-do-well boyfriend predictably winds up in prison on federal conspiracy charges, what would you do? Obviously, you’d meet up with her one last time, grudge-fuck the ever-loving shit out of her, then laugh as you went out the door. Yeah. Exactly. Pick: Schaub
New York Jets @ Buffalo. Ah, the AFC East. Where five wins will likely net you second place. Good times. The game itself is not worth betting on, but Vegas has set the odds that Lee Evans snaps and beats someone to death in the lockerroom at 1:3. Pick: New York
Baltimore @ Cleveland. The real Browns against the new Browns. Why is Cleveland the only city who considers the expansion team that took the place of the departed franchise a continuation of the old franchise? How does this make sense? I mean, if the Ramseys suddenly adopted a 15 year old girl, we wouldn’t consider her a continuation of Jon Benet, would we? No; we’d just call her “Patty Ramsey’s next murder victim.” And murder, ironically enough, gives me a nice segue into what the Ravens are going to do to the Browns. Pick: Baltimore
St. Louis @ Dallas. Stephen Jackson is out for at least a week with a torn groin. Go ahead, try to come up with a more uncomfortable pairing of words than “torn groin.” That’s right up there with “fecal impaction,” “octogenarian porn,” and “I’m late.” Speaking of fecal impaction, have you seen the Rams play this year? Pick: Dallas
Chicago @ Detroit. There is a good chance that the only person in America happier than I am about Brian Griese (my favorite Michigan QB of all time) taking over is Brian Griese himself. Of course, really close behind me are a couple million Bears fans and pretty much everyone associated with the organization, aside from The Sex Cannon. Assuming Griese doesn’t trip over his dog on his way to the airport, Brian makes the Bears relevant again. Pick: Chicago
Oakland @ Miami. This game sucks. But at least a LOT of people get to watch it suck. Pick: Oakland
Green Bay @ Minnesota. The resurgence of Brett Favre transports us back to the halcyon days of the mid-90s, when Boyz II Men ruled the airwaves, Pulp Fiction was all the rage, and Brett was popping more pain pills than a burn victim with two broken legs. Those were the salad days. We were riding the crest of a high and beautiful wave. Now, less than fifteen years later, you can go up on grain silo in Wisconsin and look West, and with the right kind of eyes you can almost see the high-water mark–that place where the wave finally broke and rolled back. Pick: Green Bay
Seattle @ San Francisco. Overly-caffeinated yuppies travel south to take on stinky, granola-munching hippies. Starbucks and patchouli. Space Needle and Haight Ashbury. World’s are colliding! George is getting upset! Pick: Seattle
Tampa Bay @ Carolina. Dateline, September 23, 2007.
“So, yeah, you just have to blow dry it, then spray on some leave-in cond– hold on.
“What’s that, coach? In? In where? THIS game? Crap.
“[to self] OK, David, get it together. You can do this. Hand towel? Check. Fabulous white gloves? “Check. Breath? Minty fresh. Let’s roll. *runs toward the field*
“[to Fox] What? Oh, yeah. *grabs helmet*” Pick: Tampa Bay
Denver @ Indianapolis. From Liston’s week 3 recap: Peyton Manning has the biggest head I have ever seen in my life. His forehead is at least a foot in height if it’s an inch. He resembled one of those super strong retards from high school. It was really creeping me out. [...] It’s like straight out of the movie The Hills Have Eyes. Remember when you were little and would walk to the convenience store to get a pickle and they would be on the counter in that gigantic pickle jar? Yeah, that’s how big his head is. It’s like a gigantic pickle jar with some hair sprinkled on top. How can Jay Cutler compete with that? Pick: Indy
Pittsburgh @ Arizona. Kurt Warner and Matt Leinart are the Odd Couple of the NFL. Warner, the bible thumper, prefers Corinthians over chlamydia and would therefore never be seen cavorting around LA nightclubs with Paris Hilton. Leinart, on the other hand, eschews chicks with dicks and would therefore never be seen with Brenda Warner. Pick: Pittsburgh
Kansas City @ San Diego. These teams are eerily similar. Both feature amazingly overrated coaches, QBs who seem uncomfortable doing anything other than handing off, superstar RBs who have yet to do anything positive this year, All-Pro TEs who double as their teams’ best receivers, and zero need to make playoff travel arrangements. In fact, the only difference I can see is that one of the coaches is black and the other is white with a faux popcorn finish. Pick: San Diego
Philadelphia @ New York Giants. Last year, both of these teams made the playoffs. This year, the loser of this game finds itself in last place in the conference. Parity, bitches! Pick: Philly
New England @ Cincinnati. Here’s what I know: The Bengals rank 29th in points allowed and in yards allowed. The Patriots rank second in points scored, first in yards per game, and first in likelihood of decimating teams with suspect defenses. Also, if someone can explain to me why the Bengals are projected to score 25 (the over/under is 57.5, but Indy is only giving 7.5 points), I’ll give you a cookie. The editors of DGDB&D reserve the right to replace the cookie with a prize of equal or lesser value. Pick: New England
Through early morning fog I see, visions of the things to be
Sep 25, 2007 2007 Season, Andre Johnson, Batman, Injury bug, Jacoby Jones is slighty less unheralded, Ron Dayne likes pie
Tim took a break from shmoozing his readers to offer us a quick recap of who is in and who is out this weekend as the JUGGERNAUT travels down to the Dirty South.
Unfortunately, it looks like some of those injuries are going to be for longer than just the upcoming beatdown of the Falcons. Andre Johnson is expected to miss “at least two more weeks” according to HoustonProFootball.com. Jacoby Jones is out at least that long as well according to pretty much every source. Obviously, McKinney is done for the year with the blown ACL, as is Killings with a fractured neck. Good lord.
Of these, obviously Andre Johnson is the most important. That is hardly news. Now, I am not a physical therapist (though I have said I was as a pickup line before), but I have sprained a knee, and getting that flexibility back after the brace comes off can be a bitch–the tendons feel all tight and weird and you keep thinking it is going to explode if you bend it. Long story short, if he is ready to go in two weeks, AJ is a bad motorscooter.
In happier news, Ron Dayne managed to dislodge the immigrant family he accidentally swallowed, so he should be good to go this week. Also, according to Ahman Green, Batman is fine and just needs the swelling to go down, though Kubiak wasn’t quite so sure. Breaking the tie, for now at least, KFFL says that Megan Manfull says that she heard from Tommy who sits next to Becky in Biology that Green will play. Of course, we all know Becky is a lying slut, so take that with a grain of salt.
The best news from the M*A*S*H unit is that Andre Davis is going to play, despite dislocating his finger last week. After that leaping sideline grab last week, I became a fan of Apostrophe. Hell, I would Friendster the guy if I had any clue what the hell that meant. Stupid kids with their stupid hip slang. In my day, “bad” meant “good,” and that’s how it was supposed to be!
Hype Bowl
Sep 24, 2007 Athletes who don't stab people, Bad Idea Jeans, Reggie Bush, Teams that aren't the Texans, Vinsanity
It’s Vince v. Reggie (and hopefully, if you are a Saints fan, some good players, too) in their first matchup since VY tore USC’s collective heart out and showed it to them before they died. Of course, this came on the bowl game heels of Young doing the same thing to Michigan in the Rose Bowl. So, as far as Vince goes, I have to grudgingly give him the respect a winner deserves; but I ain’t giving Reggie shit.
Anywho…I think I’ll liveblog this mother. For a while, anyway.
7:34–Tony Kornheiser explains that the impact of the Saints’ resurgence last year was not just a local story, but a national one. He can’t be right, though, because I don’t recall hearing ANY parallels made between the Saints success and the post-Katrina rebuilding effort. Tony’s a liar.
7:39–Spike Lee just welcomed me to N’awlins. And now he’s praising the Saints as “damn good.” Spike really has nothing to do now that Reggie Miller retired, does he?
7:41–I’ll give Saints fans this–they are as hyped as you can possibly be for an 0-2 team. Kickoff goes for a touchback. THERE’S VINCE YOUNG, OMG!!!!!
7:42–Young to Bo Scaife for 20 on the first play of the game. Vince might have the ugliest throwing motion this side of Rich Gannon, but Christ that’s a cannon.
7:44–Young to Roydell Williams for another first. Two straight passes. I give Jeff Fisher credit for saying “fuck you, ESPN announcers who will obviously be talking about our running game in the intro.”
7:46–Young just introduced the Titans (before completing his fourth straight pass). I learned that Titans players have nicknames such as “Shrek” (Scaife) and “Fat Fuck” (White).
7:47–Scott Fujita introduces the team, but I am too busy wondering why he doesn’t look more Asian to listen.
7:50–Michelle Tafoya is talking, so this seems like a good chance to mention that the wife is unreceptive to the idea of naming our forthcoming child “DeMeco.”
7:51–3rd & 21…fumbled snap, Vince dropped for a loss of roughly 84. Will Smith got jiggy as hell on that play. (I’m sorry.)
7:54–…And the Saints take the field. Can’t you smell the excitement? Eric Metcalf, Jr., gets 2 on an end-around (not a reverse, Tirico, you shit-eating fuck). Wow.
7:56–Pressure, Incomplete Pass, Three-and-out for YOUR N’awlins Saints. At least they made sure the world’s Greatest Weapon touched the ball on that possession.
7:58–Great punt return negated by holding and a personal foul. Call me old school, but I am of the opinion that your punt returner should not be run down by five or six members of the opposing team once he has an angle. Crazy, I know.
8:01–Young throws on the run and it’s nearly picked of by the curiously named Usama Young. Might just want to go by your middle name, dude. I’m just saying… you ARE playing in the South.
8:02–LenDale White makes Ron Dayne look like Kate Moss circa 1995. And I am pretty sure he’s using a Hostess cupcake as a mouthpiece.
8:04–Tennessee is moving the ball however they damn well please. The Saints defense must’ve left with some FEMA trailers.
8:06–FG after two VY incompletions on overthrown balls. The good news is the first quarter is moving right along. The bad news is there are still three to go. Aside from one amazing Vince run, this is like watching a Big Sky conference game.
8:09–SuperDuper Reggie is on the kick return team. as an up man. Fake handoff to Bush around the 10. Anyone who didn’t see that coming, please raise your hand so you can be prevented from procreating.
8:13–Drew Brees just referred to Bush as “the human highlight reel” in the intros. First, that’s Dominique Wilkins’ nickname you uncreative twat. Second, here is my favorite highlight on the reel.
8:14–Really crappy pass on 4th & 1. Three-and-out. This is like that movie… with Bill Murray… where everything was the same…
8:16–First quarter ends on a LenDale rush. By the way, did you realize that White got the last seven rushes by a USC back in the national championship loss? Or that Bush touched the ball less than 20 times combined (receptions and rushes)?
8:20–Scaife runs a two-yard route on 3rd & 3. S-m-r-t. Chris Brown is able to convert on 4th, though, so maybe it was all a ruse by Fisher. He’s crafty.
8:21–Flea flicker! It doesn’t work, but, man, I love that play. And reader Will points out that we should try the same play at some point, considering we do almost nothing–oh, TD Tennessee, making it 10-0…Saints suck–tricky. An apparent hand-off to Leach with Jacoby flying down the sideline… I’ve said too much already.
8:26–Holy hell, was that an Eminem song that played us to commercial break? Roger Goodell does not approve!
8:28–Reggie Bush alone in the backfield…catches the dump pass for a loss of four or so. Can you actually see my smile as I type this? Colston makes up for it with a first down grab on the next play. Which would be their FIRST first down. Jaws says the have “giddyup in their step,” and I’ll take his word for it.
8:31–Brees is picked off by the underrated Keith Bulluck. Odds that Drew is praying for a levee failure right about now?
8:32–And the kindly Mr. Young throws it right back to the Saints. Seriously, this game sucks.
8:38–Three plays: Dropped 2-yard pass to McAllister. Throwback across the field to McAllister for one yard. Incomplete pass over the middle. So, I ask you: how in the world was this the best offense in football last year? I really, truly do not understand.
8:42–White pushes the pile like he’s fighting his way to the front of the Denny’s buffet. “I want those eggs, bitch! Get out my way, bitch!!”
8:44–3rd & 2…Vince underthrows his WR. Welcome to Puntsville, population YOU.
8:45–Bad decision by the punt returner, who eschews the fair catch and much prefers getting the shit knocked out of him by Michael Griffin. And, because of a penalty, the Titans will rekick…WITH REGGIE BACK FOR THE PUNT!!! OMG!!! CAN YOU FEEL THE EXCITEMENT?!?!?! I JUST CAME!!!!
8:46–Seven yard return by God’s Chosen Running Back. Cock tease.
8:48–McAllister in the lockerroom for x-rays, meaning THE GREATEST PLAYER IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD is in at RB. Oh, he just got tackled for a loss on that handoff. 2 rushes for 3 yards so far. Wowza.
8:49–Big pass from Brees to Colston, who gets down almost to the 25. Might want to do more good stuff like that.
8:50–Or just get a three-yard pass to the TE. Shine on.
8:52–Super Jesus gets 6 on the carry, totally absolving all of humanity of their sins.
8:53–Tony K is questioning whether Bush is overrated as an RB. And Jaws agrees. I feel woozy. I though this was ESPN. Where am I?
8:54–Aaron Stecker in at RB, so Bush can be a WR. Stecker gets the first down, but it was probably because of Reggie’s amazing presence on the field. Super Jesus decoys all!!! (Yes, I am getting loopy. Wine and prescription drugs will do that. But even in my inebriated state, I can see greatness, damn it.)
8:56–Lance Moore just pulled in the best four-yard sideline catch you’ll ever see. Go Toledo Rockets!
8:57–3rd & 5…Brees avoids the sack by shoving his face into the oncoming hand of Antwan Odom. FIRST DOWN!
8:58–The World’s Most Amazing Human Being Ever Birthed On Our Planet comes up just short of the endzone on a draw. But it is going to be reviewed! Everyone, hold your collective breath!
9:01–Upon further review…the runner did fail to reach the endzone. How can that be? HOW?!
9:02–GOD’S FAVORITE SON, WHOM HE LOVES MUCH MORE THAN JESUS just dropped an easy TD pass. Yes, I am smiling.
9:03–Third try is a charm, as First Ballot Hall of Famer Reggie Bush gets the one-yard TD run. His line tonight? 5 carries, 13 yards, 1 TD. Oh, and one catch for -5. Quality.
9:04–Vince Young might be injured? This is great news for anyone who prefers their team to be piloted by an alcoholic racist.
9:05–Collins takes the field as Tafoya tells us it is an issue with Vince’s wrist. Wait a second… I’d completely forgotten that Drunky McKlansman was a #5 overall pick.
9:06–Relax… Vince’s wrist problem is just caused by cramps. It must be that time of the month.
9:08–Sweet, merciful halftime. Oh, fuck, it’s Berman. I’m getting a snack.
9:22–…aaaaand, we’re back, though I’m sure none of us has exhaled since Vince left the field.
9:23–Tafoya tell us Vince is fine, per Coach Fisher. Just to prove he is tough, Vince slapped some teammates with that hand. In game news, Baby Jesus’ Golden Hair just lobbed the ball back to Brees, who was promptly murdered by five dudes.
9:25–Three-and-out and a punt. The more things change…
9:29–Blah blah Vince’s arm blah tough blah blah LenDale ate a pony blah. Three-and-out, punt forthcoming. Who wants me to just start linking to random porn? Anyone?
9:31–Tired by his enormous workload, BUSHGOD takes a seat so Aaron Stecker can get some face time.
9:33–I have to say, this ESPN criticism of Bush, no matter how slight, is a nice touch. An unexpected nice touch.
9:35–Our Lord and Savior gets 11 on a dump pass. Nice moves there. I’m sure they drafted you hoping that you’d be a great check-down option. Oh, Stecker is in at RB now because the Saints actually want to run the ball between the tackles.
9:37–Nice pass and catch by Colston, who gets down to the one. AllahGodMohammedJesus punches it in from one yard out. 14 yards rushing and 2 TDs. He is apparently Jerome Bettis, circa 2005.
9:39–Let me just go ahead and state how annoyed I am that Reggie can look like dogshit carrying the ball, but still have two TDs. I am even more annoyed thinking about how ESPN will only show the TDs. And, no, I STILL wouldn’t take him over Mario. I’m rambling again…
9:41–Michael Griffin with a nice return out to the 41. In other news, it appears my prayers that the Superdome collapse tonight will not be answered. I suppose this is what happens when you take EVERY diety’s name in vain.
9:43–Chris Brown busts off a big run and, just like that, the Titans are inside the NO 40. Let’s go, Titans?
9:45–White powers for a big first down and seemed to be face-masked for 4 seconds with no call. It’s a brave man that sticks his fingers inside LenDale’s cage.
9:47–Defense offsides. Free first down. Way to follow up that impressive drive, New Orleans. I’m sure Drew Brees appreciates the breather, but maybe get a stop if you want to win a game this season.
9:51–Young throws a horribly ugly pass on the run to Eric Moulds. Great catch by Moulds, too. Tony K just made an age joke about Moulds. He’s so witty and irreverent. Catch being challenged. As is my will to live.
9:53–Play upheld. Fuck you for challenging Mike Carey.
9:54–TD, White. Titans lead. Saints still suck.
9:58–Bush for 1 yard. Unfortunately for the Saints, they were more than one yard from the endzone.
10:01–Brees leaps for the first down and gets nailed by three defensive players. He’s no Joseph Addai. 10 points for courage; 2 points for brains.
10:03–The leap was for naught, as Brees fumbles on the next snap. Titans ball. If they score a TD on this drive, the bloggin’ is done for tonight.
10:05–Great patience by VY waiting for Roydell Williams to get open. Nice pass, too. Vince is apparently only 12 of 20 for 150+, 1 TD, 1 INT, but this sure seems like one of his better passing performances that I’ve seen. Odd.
10:07–Tirico points out that a QB who can run well is a dual threat. He is so wise, that Tirico. I can totally understand why he replaced Dan Patrick on the radio show. Tirico is also a dirty, dirty man.
10:09–Titans are down to the 2-yard line. Inertia prevents LenDale from cutting, so he plows into a pile of bodies for no gain.
10:10–NICE pass on the rollout from Vince to Scaife. Touchdown, Titans. Bedtime, Matt.
A Question of Depth Chart Semantics
Sep 24, 2007 Batman, Curious Coaching, My Officemate is a Fucking Twit, Samkon Gado cured cancer
This question may sound rhetorical, but I am really looking for an answer. Isn’t the point of keeping a guy on your roster so that, should the need arise, he would be able to play? I mean, we aren’t in the business of just keeping people around because they are trying to go to med school or can make origami swans or whatever, are we?
I ask because I am struggling to figure out why Samkon Gado made the 53-man roster if, when his time finally came to play, we were going to have him split carries with backup fullback Jameel Cook. You know, the same Jameel Cook who, prior to yesterday, had six carries in his entire career. The same Jameel Cook whom many Texans fans wanted to see released outright after his TWO game-losing fumbles against the Giants and the Bills last season. Yeah, that guy.
So, back to the question: If Sam Gado is not good enough to play running back ahead of our backup fullback, why is he on the roster in the first place?
I am not asking the “why did Gado struggle against the Colts D” question. I highly doubt any teams have a third RB who would fare well against that unit. I am asking why Gado exists as a Texan if he is not a far better option than Cook. I think that’s a valid question and one that is made even more valid as it appears somewhat likely we will go into week 4 without Ahman Green or Ron Dayne.
Gado had six carries for 12 yards and a one-yard TD. Now, two yards per carry is not good (unless you were taken second overall in the 2006 Draft), I will grant you that. But considering the closeness of the score and Cook’s track record of fumbling late in close games, shouldn’t almost all of the carries be handled by the guy who is actually a running back? Isn’t that why he’s on your team? Isn’t that what being third on the depth chart means?! I am honestly bumfuzzled by this whole thing.
The best “standard coachspeak” answers I can come up with is that Gado made the team because he “really showed us something in the preseason” (where “something”= “naked photos of the coaching staff and some girl scouts”) or Gado is on the team because he was the “best option available.” If it really is the former answer, then there’s nothing we can do and we are stuck with Gado forever. If it’s the latter, however, I call bullshit on it now just like I did when they said it about Petey starting.
Listen…if Player X is doing absolutely nothing for you, then it’s not possible that Player Y wouldn’t be an upgrade. Petey was atrocious in that game. So bad, in fact, that non-Texans-fan friends noticed and said “Christ… don’t you guys have ANYTHING to put over there? A sock monkey, maybe? Anything?”
[Side note: Check out this hilarious defense of Petey from Houston Pro Football. Moving on.]
Anyway, given that kind of reaction, I am not buying that having a player with any additional skills would not be an improvement. And, getting back to the point of this post, the same thing holds true for Gado; if he is not good enough to play if and when his opportunity comes, then anyone who would be good enough to get 11 carries instead of 6 would be an improvement.
Maybe I am making more out of this than I should. It’s entirely possible that Gado will get all of the carries next week (assuming Dayne can’t go) and will be effective (he did have 3 TDs against Atlanta the last time he played them). It’s also entirely possible that Kubiak and Co. just split the carries between the two guys because they assumed that neither would manage much of anything, so they abandoned the running game and figured they might as well decrease the chance of the third RB getting hurt as well. I can’t say that I agree with that kind of strategy–if anything, we should have run the ball a little more, especially early in the second half–but the injury part of it would make sense.
If, however, the sole reason was because they thought Cook could do the job better than Gado, then Gado should not be a Texan. Period. End of story.
*******
I am hoping that this is my last post about the Colts game. I promise nothing, of course, but I plan to start looking ahead as of right now.
Arrows cost money. Use up the Irish; their dead cost nothing.
Sep 24, 2007 2007 Draft, 2007 Season, Injury bug, Jacoby Jones is slighty less unheralded, Offensive (punch)Line
Oh, gee, more outstanding news from yesterday’s game. And, by “outstanding,” I mean “shitacular.” Starting C Steve McKinney is out for the season with a torn ACL.
Obviously, Mike Flanagan will fill in for McKinney, with Chris White backing up Flanagan. My hope is that the team uses this chance to develop another Center and my money is on Kasey Studdard or Brandon Frye (currently on the practice squad). Of the two, I would prefer Studdard, though my primary reason is because I think Frye is better suited for Guard (or even Tackle). Besides, Studdard has “a mean streak,” which I think means that he will not hesitate to lay the pimp hand on any motherfucker that crosses him.
In other injury-plagued news, the separated shoulder Jacoby Jones suffered on his 74-yard punt return yesterday is going to keep him sidelined “two or three weeks.” With any luck, Jerome Mathis will slide into the PR duties so that we don’t have to deal with Dexter Wynn for “two or three weeks” of punt returning.
Bueno y malo
Sep 24, 2007 2007 Season, Andre Johnson, Batman, Demarcus Faggins sucks, Injury bug, The Schaub Experiment
Let’s play a little Monday morning round of “Good News / Bad News.”
Good. Our next two games are against teams that have yet to win a game in 2007 and that are quarterbacked by Joey Harrington and Trent Green, respectively.
Bad. Our starting WRs against Atlanta might very well be Jerome Mathis and Kevin Walter (or even worse, Bethel Johnson and Kevin Walter).
Good. Atlanta is allowing 142 rushing yards per game.
Bad. There is a chance Sam Gado will be our starting RB this week.
Good. We have a top-5 run defense, which is amazing when you consider that the LBs are also having to protect against short passes to make up for our weaknesses at CB2 and safety.
Bad. Petey Faggins is still a starter, so our 234 passing yards per game allowed will not likely go down any time soon.
Good. Matt Schaub took full responsibility for the Gary Brackett INT, saying, “I made the wrong decision and we paid for it.”
Bad. That INT could not have been less timely, with the game at 24-10 and Jacoby Jones having just busted a 74 yard return.
Good. The team isn’t buying into the “moral victory” spiel, as evidenced by Chester Pitts saying, “[m]oral victory is trash. It’s a sin to say that. That was the [old] attitude and mind-set. It wasn’t to win the game — it was to keep it close. I want to call it disgust. We had four or five opportunities to put points on the board.”
This post just beat Faggins on a dig route
Sep 23, 2007 2007 Season, Amobi Okoye is 20, Athletes who don't stab people, Batman, Colts Shmolts, DeMeco Ryans, Demarcus Faggins sucks, Posts that list too many players, The Fred, The Schaub Experiment
It wasn’t that long ago that Stephanie admonished me for attacking Chad Stanley the person rather than simply berating Stanley’s performance. While I don’t agree with her, I understand where she was coming from. There are times, however, when a person’s performance is so bad that complaining about the player himself becomes part and parcel of discussing his contributions.
That person, of course, is Petey Faggins.
Last week, Faggins was beat-down to the tune of 3 catches for 47 yards and 2 TDs within Carolina’s first five minutes of possession. This fact was not lost on the Indianapolis Colts. In fact, they did everything short of pointing and laughing derisively at Faggins as they went to the line. Petey might as well have worn a bulls-eye in place of his number 38.
Think about it. A team with at least five weapons in the passing game (Harrison, Wayne, Clark, Gonzales, and Addai)–a team that is known for spreading the ball around among all the receivers–basically said, “you know what… screw it; we’re just going right at number 38.” And did they ever. I need to review the tape for a definite count, but I put the number of passes thrown (and completed) to Faggins’ responsibility somewhere north of 8.
Of course, it’s easy for a QB like Manning to complete passes when the DB is giving his responsibility an 8-yard cushion on every single play. Faggins looked like he was so scared of getting beat deep that he would rather let the person catch the ball in front of him and simply try to make the tackle. This is a bad plan in general. It becomes a truly horrible plan when your team absolutely, positively must have a 3-and-out to get the ball back. Rather than play up even in that dire circumstance, Faggins gave enough cushion that Harrison caught the ball past the first down marker and Petey STILL had to close on him to make the play.
This kind of coverage would be bad enough on its own. Unfortunately, Faggins also screwed up on both of Addai’s TD runs. I’m not sure what is more embarrassing–letting Joseph Addai jump over you because you go too low, too early, or ignoring your outside responsibility, running INTO a block, then failing to disengage in time to even get a hand on the guy who ran right at where you were supposed to be–but both plays were laughably bad. Unless you are a Texans fan, in which case they were still bad, but sans laughter.
Word around the campfire is that People Who Know Things just don’t think rookie Fred Bennett is anywhere close to ready to play CB2 at the NFL level. Well, guess what…neither is Faggins. Are you seriously telling me that Bennett could not play off his receiver, get burned by nearly every receiver he defends, be targeted by opposing offenses, and blow tackling assignments as well as Faggins can? Well that’s a risk I am willing to take. Besides, that would give us 13 games to see if Bennett shows enough skill to make us believe he can take over that role full-time at some point in the near future. If he steps in and does well, we have solved the problem and improved our defense at the same time. If he fails, he can’t be any worse than Faggins has been and it gives us even more reason to pursue Asomugah.
Look, I know all about how Petey is a “really nice guy” and “a hard worker” and all that. Thing is, I don’t care. Not one little bit. Until I see Bennett and Jamar Fletcher look like Moe and Curly out there, you will not be able to convince me that one of them is not better than Faggins.
The good news, Texans fans, is that even with Faggins’ “performance” and enough injuries to make Florence Nightingale say, “yo, hold up,” we still had a chance to win that game with 2:30 left on the clock. That is not something that Texans v. 1.0 would have managed. I smell a list.
Da Good
- Amobi Okoye. That’s three sacks in the last two games for Manchild. The impressive part, though, is the strength he’s shown in blasting through double-teams and closing on the QB once he breaks free.
- The offensive line. While Schaub was technically sacked thrice, the third one hardly counts (other than on the stat sheet), as Schaubby had to hold the ball long enough for the WRs to get 30 or 40 yards downfield. Other than Salaam getting bowled over by a bull rush, the line did a fantastic job against a much quicker front four than they’d previously faced. Their work was even better when you consider that we presented NO running game, so the Colts knew we were throwing.
- Matt Schaub. You know…every time I see Schaub feel a little pressure, escape just far enough to avoid the trouble, and throw an accurate pass to a moving receiver, I cry little tears of joy inside. Watching him march the team down the field in the fourth quarter, I thought to myself, “so this is what it feels like to know you have a quarterback for the next decade or so.”
- Andre’ Davis. Apostrophe was only activated because the other Andre wasn’t able to go today. When Jones went down, however, Davis promptly came in and played like someone who should not have been waiver-wire fodder. The leaping grab he made at the one was nothing short of fantastic.
- The Final Score. No, we didn’t win. But if you told any Texans fan back in April that they would play within a TD of the Super Bowl Champs, despite not having Andre Johnson, Ahman Green, the starting punt returner, or Ron Dayne, and despite only getting one sack, I think they would have taken it.
- The Run Defense. Considering the LBs have to help in pass coverage, read the play, and then close on the RB, the fact that we kept the Colts under 100 yards for the day has to be considered a positive.
- Jerome Mathis. Nice kick return, dude. And a couple nice catches, too. Who are you, and what have you done with Jerome?
Da Bad
- Petey Faggins. Ugh.
- Matt Schaub. He makes this list for one reason–the INT by Gary Brackett. I liked the play call, but you kind of have to make sure that the proper people bit on the play fake before you go to the obvious first read. Tsk, tsk.
- The injury to Cedric Killings. I feel bad for the guy–I might have jinxed him–and I wish him nothing but a speedy and complete recovery. To be fair, though he did drop his head at the last second for some reason. Players are taught from the earliest levels of football not to do this, but Kubiak should still make all his players watch that play and the Kevin Everett injury a couple times, just to reinforce it.
- The injuries. Andre Johnson, Ahman Green, Ron Dayne, Cedric Killings, Steve McKinney, Jacoby Jones. Jeez.
- Petey Faggins.
DeMeco
- 13 tackles. He’s a bad mother.
I’d like to by a vowel
Sep 23, 2007 2008 Draft, Demarcus Faggins sucks, Dunta Robinson, Nnamdi Asomugha, Posts that list too many players, Secondary issues are primary, The Fred
The focus of today’s game, whether we like it or not, will be on the Texans secondary. That’s what happens when you play a team that features at least four bona fide weapons in the passing game. So, I figured today was as good a day as any to discuss the future of that unit.
So far in 2007, Dunta Robinon has played like a bona fide NFL CB1. I am hoping that this is really the season where he establishes himself as a true lockdown cover corner. Now, I realize that I am in the minority of Texans fans when I suggest that Dunta has not been stellar throughout his career, but–at least according to KC Joyner–the stats bear this out. In Scientific Football 2006, Joyner pointed out that Dunta was tied for 68th in completion percentage, 63rd in tight/good coverage percentage, 61st in deep completion percentage, and 74th in short completion percentage in 2005.
Anyway, the 2007 version of Dunta is looking like he is finally putting it all together. I mentioned it the other day, but while Dunta was defending him, Steve Smith managed all of 3 catches for 23 yards and Dunta notched an INT. That’s solid defense. So, for now, let’s labor under the assumption that Dunta is finally the real deal.
On the other side, Demarcus Faggins spent the first two series against Carolina as the poster child for poor coverage. Now, I think I have mentioned once or twice my distaste for Petey as a CB2, so the fact that he was abused so thoroughly last week did not come as a surprise, at least to me. Unfortunately, as of right now, I have to agree with Stephanie and Kubiak that Faggins is the best option we have out there. Jamar Fletcher has played well (at times) as the nickel, but he hasn’t shown me anything that would suggest he can make the move to CB2. And, while Fred Bennett still might develop into that role, his penchant for getting lit up on deep routes gives me pause.
So, just for a second, let’s assume that the Texans end this season in the same position as last season–with one real CB. Just like the lack of depth at safety in the upcoming draft, which we’ve already touched on, 2008 does not look like the year to snag another top flight corner.
So, what’s the answer? Nnamdi Asomugha.
Asomugha can opt out of his contract and become a free agent at the end of this season, and he will likely demand Nate Clements money. While that’s a steep price tag, Nnamdi is arguably second only to Champ Bailey as an NFL corner. Also, we look to have some decent space left under the salary cap going into the 2008 signing season.
In addition to giving the Texans the best 1-2 CB tandem in the league, signing Asomugha would also allow us more flexibility in dealing with our safety situation. Hopefully, Boulware can come on and be a contributor. In addition, we get Earl back. With that kind of CB coverage in front of them, it is entirely possible that you could piece together a good safety duo out of existing parts, meaning that you would be able to address other areas (RB, SLB, OL) with your draft picks. So, yes, it would cost a lot to sign Nnamdi, but–at least by my count–the benefits to the defense would far outweigh the price tag. I mean, in a division where you will be forced to defend Reggie Wayne and Marvin Harrison twice per season, can you think of a better way to do it than with Robinson and Asomugha?
UPDATE: Well, sure enough, Faggins continues to be atrocious in coverage. At this point, merely being “bad” would be an upgrade.
Starring Martin Lawrence and Tim Robbins
Sep 23, 2007 2007 Season, Andre Johnson, Colts Shmolts, Teams that aren't the Texans, The Schaub Experiment
As cliched as it all sounds, it really does go without saying that a win today would be the biggest in franchise history. We would be alone atop the AFC South standings for the first time ever. We would be riding a five-game winning streak. We would put the rest of the NFL–along with 99% of the talking heads out there–on notice that this Texans team is for real. And, hell, a win would all but guarantee a playoff birth for us if recent history is any indication.
Likewise, a win would be huge for Matt Schaub. He has come in and answered so many questions already about the offensive line, the shortcomings of that old QB, and even whether Schaubby was worth all that we traded to get him. Winning today, however, especially with Andre Johnson sidelined, would pretty much put the past to bed once and for all. Schaub will have established himself as an NFL starter and there will no longer be any need to dwell on 2002-2006.
That’s what happens if we win. What happens if we lose, though?
Now, don’t get me wrong. I want to win, I know we can win, and I think we will win. I am just asking what the repercussions will be if we don’t. By my way of thinking, a loss today is surprisingly not that big of a deal, especially if the game is relatively close. Considering that basically no one (other than Rod Woodson, apparently) thinks we will win, a loss would not having people screaming from the rooftops about how we aren’t who they thought we were. Because the Colts are also undefeated and are, you know, World Champs, there is little harm in losing to them–it simply tells you that you are not quite at that level and it gives you something to work toward. And, whether he was a factor last December or not, losing a game when you are missing a weapon like Andre Johnson is hardly shocking.
Really, the only downside to a loss would be that this is the first chance most people will have had to watch the Texans. Barring us getting blown out of Reliant, though, even losing in front of a national audience is not a huge deal. Sure, some people (read: idiots) will watch the game and, should we lose, start talking about how we were overrated and haven’t played anyone real. Of course, those people didn’t see us win a game last week that no Texans team before this one would have. So what do they know?
What all this means, of course, is that today is a win-win situation. We go into today’s game with everything to gain and very, very little to lose. The best part is, in those situations, the team can just go out and play.
In the end, I am hoping that the “losing” part of this discussion is moot. Maybe it’s the Kool-Aid, maybe it’s my anticipation of how loud Reliant will be, or maybe it’s just full-on optimism spawned by the 2-0 start, but I really do think we can win today. If we don’t, though, just remember not to panic. Besides, with Atlanta next up on the schedule, life just gets better from here.
Bulletin board material?
Sep 22, 2007 Andre Johnson, Batman, Bloggerating, Colts Shmolts
So, what are the Internet-based Colts fans saying about this week’s game?
We start our tour at Stampede Blue. (Side note: This is, hands down, the best Colts blog out there. Of course that is sort of like being the best Filipino tranny porn website, but still, it’s always good to be number 1.) Man, they are really letting us have it over there. Just look at this post, wherein our old pal Big Blue Shoe…actually talks about how good we are looking and how we are going to win 10 games. Hmm. Nevermind. Moving on.
Over at Colts Couch Crew, there was nary a mention of the game, as it seems Russell Puntenney (which sounds dirty, but isn’t) is far more concerned with the cheating nature of Bill Belichick and the Patriots. He also offers up an asinine theory about how CameraGate will make the Colts look better in retrospect, as if all the choke jobs preceding last year’s success were the result of subterfuge and trickery. Whatever.
Cranky Colts–what’s with all the alliteration?–was at least talking about the game, but only with regard to us being without Andre Johnson and the author’s hope that Freddie Keaiho will play.
In the end, I was only able to find one post with any sort of smack talk, and it was this one from ColtFreaks.com (predicted score: Colts 34, Texans 10).
I do look for Ahman Green to have nice day but nothing outrageous like Dayne did last year. Without Andre Johnson, the Texans have no major threats. Yes Houston you do have a problem and I see this one getting away from you fast. The Colts will be a little hungry for revenge and the Texans do not have the personnel to get the job done. Yes you have a few emerging players on D, a good young QB, decent RB, but not enough weapons to get it done.
That’s about it. Only one score prediction. Only one poorly-punctuated attempt at trash talking analysis. What gives? The only thing I can figure is that–much like the media and the rest of the non-Texans fans out there–Colts fans can’t quite figure out how good this Houston team is, so they are avoiding making much out of the game. If they win, they can chalk the pre-game radio silence up to “we weren’t worried about the Texans because we are the world champs;” if they lose, the lack of smack before kickoff lends itself nicely to “we knew these Texans were for real…good job.”
Either that, or they really are more concerned with Belichick than with this game. Which would be funny in a revisionist, “our one ring is better than their three” sort of way. Surely that’s not it…
Nobody can eat fiddy eggs.
Sep 20, 2007 2007 Season, Batman,