On booze and losses
Oct 29, 2007 2007 Season, Beer, Boobies, Demarcus Faggins sucks, Disturbing (yet accurate) Metaphors, Gary Kubiak might be high, Inanity, Injury bug
I suppose it goes without saying that this is not exactly where I hoped we would be at the halfway point. But I am going to say it anyway.
I hoped that this season would be the equivalent of sipping Clos du Mesnil 1995 with a supermodel on board your private jet.
I expected that this season would be the equivalent of enjoying Chateau Mouton Rothschild Pauillac 1986 on the patio of your 12,000 square foot oceanside villa.
Right now, this season is the equivalent of sucking stale PBR out of the G-string of a male stripper in the bathroom of a truckstop in Shamrock, TX.
You could say it’s not quite living up to expectations.
Look, I realize that we have been ravaged–decimated even–by injuries. Not many teams could lose their biggest weapon, their starting running back, both of their kick/punt returners, a starting safety and the safety’s first replacement, and their starting center and expect to contend for anything. Well, unless they were in the NFC, but that’s a different story.
The injuries are still no excuse for the play we’ve seen since kickoff of the Atlanta game. Poor (at best) defensive play-calling, mediocre clock-management, questionable roster decisions, the continued employment of Petey Faggins…any one of these would be troublesome. Having all of them? Well, that explains the current record.
I am currently trying to answer the question of “where do we go from here?” At our current level of play, the answer is 3-13. A more realistic number, barring some major changes, is probably 6-10. A best-case scenario would be 8-8.
I am going to split the baby and peg us at no more than 7 wins. Which would be the equivalent of drinking Chimay Bleue poolside with a couple of hot redheads who are milking you for free drinks and will absolutely not sleep with you.
Sad part is, with the taste of warm PBR still in your throat, that overpriced cocktease seems like a win.
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October 29th, 2007 at 8:38 pm
You may need a new tag of: Disturbing (yet accurate) Metaphors
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October 29th, 2007 at 8:47 pm
Done and done.
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October 30th, 2007 at 12:28 pm
You nailed it! That’s exactly what it feels like…ugh.
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October 30th, 2007 at 12:50 pm
if we dont beat oakland, we could very well be looking at a 5 win season…I just puked in my mouth.
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October 30th, 2007 at 2:48 pm
anyone who doubts the impact of playmaker recievers, look at the difference in brady v.2006 and brady v.2007
maybe aj, kw and either jj or ad isn’t quite as formidable as moss, stallworth and welker, but it definitely has the potential to be a VERY impressive tandem.
could deangelo hall be a texan in 08? i’d say nnamdi asomughangoadupaw has the best chance just for the fact he has a funny sounding name and i think rick smith gets high and laughs at some of the names of people on his team. asante? there was doubt whether or not the latter two will ever make it to the fa wire, but i think there’s little doubt hall will be available.
just due to the fact they have displayed somewhere in the mess they are now that they actually played damn good the first three weeks, doesn’t it just give you a glimmer, ever so slight that they can pull a sybil type turnaround and start kicking ass again with a healthy schaub and aj with a more developed kevin walter?
maybe i’m buying the koolaid again, but i do agree with kubes….get rid of half the turnovers and have some sort of running game, maybe we’re 4-4 or 5-3 right now?
stranger things have happened than a miraculous turnaround by the texans. remember how atrosious the colts run d looked until the playoffs when the started shutting teams down?
sippin the koolaid….
will
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October 30th, 2007 at 4:44 pm
All good points, Will. I will say this, though–if we sign DeAngelo Hall, the whole front office needs to be fired. He’s mediocre and the most overrated player in the NFL.
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October 30th, 2007 at 5:10 pm
does anyone else miss aaron glenn after seeing him take it to the house in jax? not the best in the business, but a clear upgrade over anything we’ve had to go on the other side of dunta since he left. will