Time to make it rain in Houston?
Feb 28, 2008 HPD, Pacman Jones' gunrack, Predictions Guaranteed To Go Wrong, Secondary issues are primary
As I write this, I have Elmore James singing “The Sky is Crying” in the back of my head, and I think I know why.
As reported in Nashville’s City Paper (ironically, an old client of mine from many years ago), Pacman Jones “has been given permission by the Tennessee Titans to pursue a trade.”
Now, let’s see here. Texans have a huge need for help at CB? Check. Houston has serious zoning issues? Check. The Crystal Pistol? Check. Houston has the highest strip joints/capita in the nation? Check and check.*
Can you say match made in heaven?
Seriously, though, and tip your waitress, I have no problem giving up a 5th round pick or so and taking a chance on Pacman. Fact is, he’s still only 25, and I really don’t have a problem with taking chances on people who have made mistakes in the past, especially when considering he’ll be relatively cheap to acquire. The Texans’ locker room seems to have strong character people, and something might click for Pacman. I mean, who among us wasn’t arrested six times in their 20s? Sheesh.
Sometimes, the gamble pays off, and this one could be huge. Just say yes to Pacman. What do y’all think?
Anyway, how can I possibly thank the person who brought the phrase “make it rain” into my every day vocabulary enough? You simply can’t pay back that kind of reward.
* Yeah, I made that shit up, though I wouldn’t doubt it.
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February 28th, 2008 at 10:13 am
Those same character guys didn’t seem to help Mathis very much.
Just say nay!
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February 28th, 2008 at 10:22 am
Not surprisingly, you are correct on the gentleman’s establishments per capita and surface area. It’s practically the only reason Charles Barkley agreed to be traded to Houston in 1996.
Pac scares the crap out of me though…
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February 28th, 2008 at 11:28 am
Props to you for keeping it real and low brow with asterisks. Leave the high-falutin’ footnotes to the upper management.
I say bring him in. The Texans deserve nothing less than a shot at the record number of times an NFL player is tazed by the local police force. Plus I need to have Pac near Weary’s wife at a swingers club. I’m just curious to see if a man’s arms can literally be ripped from their body. Someone has to make that happen.
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February 28th, 2008 at 11:47 am
Hell no. Let him play for Al Davis. It’s his destiny.
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February 28th, 2008 at 11:48 am
What do I think?
What sort of scotch are you drinking?
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February 28th, 2008 at 12:19 pm
Switching topics… this scares me. From John Clayton:
The Texans’ Andre Davis is also going to make $5 million a year, and no one is 100 percent certain he’s a starter.
http://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/columns/story?columnist=clayton_john&id=3267228&lpos=spotlight&lid=tab2pos2
$5M? I really really want to re-sign him, but for $5M/year? No way.
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February 28th, 2008 at 12:36 pm
He’s the pandora’s box of the league. It’d be interesting to see what a coach like Ray Rhodes could for a guy like him. I’m sure Coach Rhodes has worked with knuckleheads like him before.
Hmmmm… interesting. I can’t say I’m fully in your corner - but I’m buying my ringside seat right behind it. PacMan vs. the team that threw him away - twice a year… hmmmm.
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February 28th, 2008 at 12:48 pm
Can you say “faustian”?
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February 28th, 2008 at 1:00 pm
@steph - Does lighter fluid count as scotch?
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Sheesh, Charlie, I thought we were trying to keep this low-brow. That said, the faustian legend relies heavily on the thought that people cannot change (much less address whether or not man is born with inherent evil). Perhaps being suspended last year was Pacman’s Icarian moment, but he’ll have the chance to fly again.
Of course, there’s a certain amount of projection going on here, as well. As somebody who has fucked up royally in the past, getting a second (third, fourth, ad nauseam) chance can sometimes be pretty helpful.
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Buck, Pacman versus a horny Fred Weary? Oh yeah, that’s PPV material.
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February 28th, 2008 at 1:01 pm
For a 5th round pick, stiff personal conduct clauses (even though Goodell would kick his ass to the curb, if he “rainmanned” again), re-working his current contract…I’d do it!
He’s a proven CB and return man in the NFL. If Andre Davis is looking for a 5mil contract and Mathis is shown the door, we have some holes to fill.
Like I said, I’d do it but, those decisions are above my pay grade..
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February 28th, 2008 at 1:11 pm
I just don’t see anybody giving Dre $5MM/year. And if we do and avoid addressing the CB issue, I won’t be real optimistic. Fact is, Dre was practice squad material at this time last year.
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February 28th, 2008 at 1:54 pm
I agree! But, someone will probably overpay for him (they’ll look at his highlight reel and not his body of work).
I doubt the Texans will move on Pacman but, I think the price will be right, the CB situation solidified, and the draft taking on a whole new look.
I could always be wrong…
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February 28th, 2008 at 1:55 pm
@grunge: You and I are on the same page. I read Clayton’s article and posted nearly identical thoughts here.
With regard to Pac Man…if I was Bob McNair, I wouldn’t even let him buy a Texans replica jersey. The further away from Reliant Park he is, the better.
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February 28th, 2008 at 3:02 pm
Fuck Clayton…Yeehaw kiss your grandma!
http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/sports/5579250.html
I think I’ll retire from my previous post on Dre….
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February 28th, 2008 at 3:09 pm
Rotoworld is reporting that we’ve resigned Andre Davis. No word yet on how much we paid him.
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February 28th, 2008 at 5:06 pm
4 years, $16 million with $8 million in guaranteed money. ouch. he’d better be “kick return touchdown ninja” next year.
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February 28th, 2008 at 5:31 pm
whew… problem solved.
Oakland was going to sign him!?!?!? Yeah, that makes sense.
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February 28th, 2008 at 5:51 pm
Well, shit. Thanks to Eric and stacy for the Dre news.
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Good news:
1. Jerome Mathis, take your wife beating ass and get the fuck out of Houston.
2. We have four very solid WRs heading into 2008. Don’t need to worry about spending a pick here. Good savings on the opportunity cost.
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Bad News:
1. Too much. I originally typed way too much, but this is really only about $1MM/year too much, relatively speaking. He saves us dough from signing a return specialist - like Mathis - and he really was fairly productive. However, this is still a ton of scratch for a player of his caliber.
2. If he were 26, maybe not bad. $8MM guaranteed? Yeah, I can see it turning into an Ahman Green situation for at least the last year.
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At least it wasn’t $5MM. And, adding on to what stacy said, he’d better be a kick return touchdown ninja with 7 TDs receiving next year and, AND, he’s also a monkey pirate saving Houston-area children in his off time.
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February 28th, 2008 at 6:15 pm
Five thoughts:
1. I like the Andre deal for the most part, assuming we get two good years out of him. Yeah, a $4MM cap hit in 2010 would be teh sux, but I doubt it will be that out of line with cap hit for similar players that year.
2. Re: 1…I was also in favor of the Ahman Green deal, so take anything I say with a big ass hunk of salt.
3. Pacman…ehh…I come down slightly in the “yes” category, assuming we shoot Travis Johnson in the face first. I don’t think you can expect a lockerroom of 53 boy scouts, so one or two psychos don’t bother me if you have the player and coaching structure to keep them in line.
4. No, seriously, I want Bob McNair to shoot Travis Johnson in the face. With a gun. It wasn’t an exaggeration or anything.
5. Little baby girls are an odd bunch. Post forthcoming.
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February 28th, 2008 at 7:15 pm
I’ve just read that the Vikings have offered a 3rd Round pick for Sage. If they’re willing to give up a 2nd Rounder, I say we take it and run. Source: ROTOWORLD
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February 28th, 2008 at 7:48 pm
This is a scenario I would love to have:
The Texans trade their 3rd rounder this year to Oakland for Michael Huff
We then Trade Sage (and all the other spices) to Minnesota for a 2nd rounder or a 3rd depending on if we do trade for Huff.
Then we draft Mendanhall with our first and pick up a DB with our 2nd or our 3rd.
We would have our safety problem taken care off(we have already re-signed The Ladies Man in this scenario) and we get a future stud to go with our healing stub CB and our Up and Coming CB.
If this dream scenario were to happen I will have to buy a new pair of pants
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February 28th, 2008 at 11:24 pm
Vikes end talks with Texans over Sage.
http://ww3.startribune.com/vikingsblog/?p=1368
Wouldn’t give us the 2nd so, maybe later…