Lazy
May 16, 2008 Bloggerating, Self-Referential Stuff, She is pretty hot, You'd like to think I was joking
I realize how quiet it’s been around here of late. That should all change with OTAs kicking off next week. As for me, I have a BBQ competition this weekend, so I don’t foresee much in the way of posting until Sunday afternoon at the earliest. But we should be back to full-strength as of Monday morning. Until then, I suggest all of you look at porn.
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May 16th, 2008 at 8:01 am
Where is your bbq competition?
We did one here in Waco a few weeks back and did pretty well (4th in beans and 6th in brisket, but sadly didn’t place in the Waco specialty - Human). We didn’t even bother with chicken or chili because, well, chili is chili and chicken ain’t meat. The saddest part is that our ribs were the best thing we cooked and we didn’t get shit for them.
Anyway, good luck, you fancy-pit-havin’ sonofabitch.
btw, what’s your team name??
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May 16th, 2008 at 8:02 am
The team name we go with: Meat is Murder
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May 16th, 2008 at 8:05 am
link dumps because Matt is lazy:
http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/2008/writers/bucky_brooks/05/15/scouting.buzz/index.html
/end link dump
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May 16th, 2008 at 8:05 am
Off-topic, but I just pulled this from ht.com about your site’s namesake:
Did You Know?
LB DeMeco Ryans graduated cum laude with a 3.7 GPA from the University of Alabama with a degree in management in only seven semesters. He was named Academic All-America, three-time Academic All-SEC and a recipient of the pretigious NCAA Top VIII Award.
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May 16th, 2008 at 8:05 am
Mmmm… barbecue… oh well, at least I’m brewing on Saturday!
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May 16th, 2008 at 8:48 am
And sorry for my absence. I’m dealing with severe to critical family issues, and I’ve got finals this week on top of everything else (yes, I’m middle-aged and back in school). I hope to post something over the weekend. Sorry to all.
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May 16th, 2008 at 9:49 am
How dare you have a family and a real life! We need Indian deities and fake conversations, dammit!
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May 16th, 2008 at 10:19 am
Posted without comment:
http://sports.aol.com/fanhouse/2008/05/15/vince-young-shirtless-patron-swilling-at-a-sausage-party/
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May 16th, 2008 at 11:23 am
@ beef: We are Law Hawgs BBQ Catering & Competition Team. Law Hawgs, for short. Predictably, it’s a team of lawyers. This comp is in North Little Rock and we are doing pork, ribs, and brisket. I’ll post pics Sunday.
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“Meat is Murder” is the coolest team name ever.
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May 16th, 2008 at 12:30 pm
@8 I thought that the thoughtful denizens of DGDB&D republic would approve of such an entry.
@9 With pictures, I want your BBQ tips. It is never too early to prepare for next year’s tailgating.
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May 16th, 2008 at 2:11 pm
Florio, at PFT, is reporting this story:
http://www.profootballtalk.com/2008/05/16/vince-young-gets-naked-in-public/
Thank you, VY! And remember, the “man-crush” from Mario, will be just that, a crushed-man (dressed or undressed,,,ewww).
Good luck Matt! But, smoking the pig, is so, umm, “hillbillish”! Win one for the “Gipper”!
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May 16th, 2008 at 3:34 pm
FUCK YOU FUCK TEXAS. I have never met a texan that isnt a shit-eating asshole. You are all fucked in the head, go and fuck your mother
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May 16th, 2008 at 4:19 pm
I was unaware that VY read this site but now that”cory” has posted on here I am sure that he does
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May 16th, 2008 at 6:26 pm
PLEASE…I’m begging here…tell me where to find some good BBQ! As a former Kansas City girl, I’m not finding TX BBQ all that great. (feel free to throw tomatoes at your monitor now) I live in San Antonio. Any suggestions? My tummy will thank you!
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May 16th, 2008 at 9:06 pm
Dearest cory,
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I have friends in Cheyenne. Please don’t embarrass them by being an insufferable prick.
Hugs,
bfd
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@Foomey: Welcome!
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The regional differences between BBQ makes it difficult to find what you want. Take Rudy’s in San Antone, for example. Here in Texas, if it ain’t dead cow, it ain’t BBQ…mostly. Sure, we’ll do chicken and the occasional pork chop and ribs, of course, but it’s all about the brisket here. THEN, you start talking about the BBQ sauces. Between the sauce and the love for the brisket, Rudy’s more or less symbolizes the Texas way of BBQing.
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As far as me, since I have several relatives in this book, I stay true to my roots
Honestly, I’ve never seen KC or Carolina BBQ here in Texas. I don’t think such a place would survive here.
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May 16th, 2008 at 10:50 pm
@Foomey
BFD is right on about Rudy’s - Having lived here in SA for six years now, they are probably your best bet - but make sure you go to the original Rudy’s in Leon Springs (I-10 West). The others in the area don’t stack up to the original. The one on 151 come the closest in the chain. If I could only eat one thing for the rest of my life, their cream corn would be on my short list. It’s that good.
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Bill Miller’s is fast food. It’s okay in a pinch, but not near the quality of Rudy’s. If you have to grab quick BBQ, try a Grady’s. When all else fails, fire up the pit and show us Texas boys how its done.
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May 16th, 2008 at 11:23 pm
Yes, I am posting this from the competition and, yes, I realize how dorky it is to have a laptop at such an event. Fuck you. I just thought I’d mention that cory’s email address is: deeplogger519@yahoo.com . I have my doubts as to the accuracy of such a moniker, but feel free to email him and suggest different ways that he could go about killing himself.
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May 17th, 2008 at 11:59 am
@the VY thingy: Those of you who know me here can just imagine how much this story/slideshow makes me smile. Looks like ole Radio really likes hanging out shirtless with dudes. Not that the whole “Austin” thing didn’t give that away. Keep it classy, Radio. You “just win” an awesome press conference.
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May 17th, 2008 at 3:00 pm
@Matt-
feel no shame in bringing your laptop to the BBQ, just know that if you don’t at least cause someone to cry because your BBQ is that much better than theirs than you have only the laptop to blame, and thus open yourself up to ridicule from non-laptop BBQers.
Also someone please email cory (a.k.a. VY) and ask him what it’s like to be a giant assbag and then procedd to ask him to kill himself.
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May 17th, 2008 at 4:46 pm
@Bigfatdrunk and Solis: Thank you. Unfortunately, your love of Rudy’s has me thinking…Thinking that I’m going to need to get back to KC ASAP! (just kidding) I ate at Rudys the very day that I moved down here. I agree with the creamed corn statement. I could bathe in that stuff!!! As for the rest…Let’s just say that even though I am Jewish…I DIG PORK! I have found some random places that do have great beef, and perhaps I should’ve specified the whole “I love Pork” issue earlier. My latest find was City Market in Luling. The staff looked at me like I was carrying the Bubonic plaque when I asked them for a fork. That was quite the dining experience, but the BBQ was damn good.(for beef) Just thought that someone might have a new fav for me to try. I’m thinking of writing a book…”The Kansas City Girl’s Guide to Texas BBQ”. Or…I’m going to buy 100 acres of land, and raise my own pigs.
Thanks for the replies!
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May 17th, 2008 at 5:47 pm
Dear Foomey,
I have had the good fortune of having barbecued one whole tree, plus most of another one. I also have the excellent fortune of being surrounded by a large supply of good barbecue wood, in it’s ultimate form, still attached to the tree.
There are 3 things that define a region or locals barbecue.
1.The meat to be barbecued.
2.The wood used to smoke the meat.
3.The sauce used to enhance both the meat and aromatic hardwood chosen.
Now Since I have some very fine relatives in Georgia, and the Carolinas, one who is a Texan who dearly misses Texas barbecue, it has “broadened” my “horizons” wrt barbecue. So as such I decided to look into what made Kansas City barbecue different. In Georgia, and the Carolinas, they mostly barbecue pork, because they don’t have an over abundance of wide open prairies near the Appalachians. So they raise hogs. Now this must be a residual, of the French Indian culture that was just west of the Appalachians, because the French dearly love mustard, before the end of the 7 years war, but in the Carolinas they use mainly mustard based sauces on pork, and since hickory is more abundant than mesquite is in Texas they use almost only hickory. The mustard based sauces don’t detract from the hickory or the pork and it’s a barbecuing tradition older than the United States.
So what is Kansas City barbecue?
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kansas_City-style_barbecue
Short story long, Texas doesn’t have a sauce that they can claim as distinctive, but anyont who has had any of KCMasterpiece, or the generic clones will note the fresh course ground black pepper standing out. Now the wiki article mentions something about slow cooked ribs, but they don’t seem to declare pork or beef, but since the article states the Kansas City style barbecue is derived from Tennessee, I’m sure it’s pork ribs.
Because of the supply of cheap grazing land suited to cattle to the early settlers to Texas, and the demand for beef by the Chicago slaughter houses which was shipped to the New York and Boston hotels and restaurants, Texas barbecue is a beef centric barbecue. The sauce, as barbecue sauce is assumed here is a blend of ketchup, brown sugar, and molasses, as those were easily ported canned goods not requiring refrigeration along the cattle drive trails towards Kansas for cattle to be shipped to Chicago for slaughter.
As far as a barbecue plate goes, the Kansas City barbecue plate has French fries, which I think is an overlooked mistake. In Texas, the typical community or organization organized barbecue, the one we grew up attending as children, is a meat course slobbered with the afore mentioned sauce, POTATO salad, sliced pickels? sweet pork and beens, and a slice of bread used to mop every thing up with.
Now I would understand how you might choose to doubt my explanation. Because My knowledge of Kansas City style barbecue is pale. It wilts in the sun of August in scant shade of mesquites in the valley. But I have made my own barbecue sauce from scratch from ketchup, molasses, and brown sugar, and I have never shied away from mustard based sauces on pork. I really like a lot of garlic in my barbecue sauce as well as some jalepeno for that extra Texas taste, and I’ve won a couple of awards for my sauce.
Please don’t take this as insult, but about the only way you’re going to get close to Kansas City style barbecue without going to north east Oklahoma, is to visit the local Chilies and put some black pepper on the baby back ribs.
A better bet, would be to just visit me, as on multiple occasions I have barbecued perfect slabs of pork ribs, and when I say perfect, I mean, there is no way humanly possible to barbecue a more perfect slab of pork ribs. I’m a real stickler for the quality of anything I do, regardless of pay. So if I say they are perfect, then that means they were flawless. It was all I could do to stop looking at then and cut some off and put them on a plate. The flavor was perfect too. You didn’t need any sauce.
But as far as barbecuing tips, here’s a quarter.
I like a lot of different cuisines, and I’ll cook any style.
Really in Texas we barbecue anything, chicken, beef, pork, sausages, hell I’ve even barbecued carp on one of those cheap weenie grills and those folks liked that. I even liked it, and that says something. If that’s a lot of bull, throw it on the pit.
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May 19th, 2008 at 7:44 am
@OneTreeDead: I’ve taken to smoking salmon for my family just about every week. Also been doing garlic, onions, and my favorite, poblanos right from the garden.
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May 19th, 2008 at 12:38 pm
RE: Carp
My uncle told me his recipe for cooking carp properly:
Go down to the lumber yard and get a good thick pine board about 12″ long per carp you’re cooking. Get a good fire of coals going on a pit. Season the carp with tony chacheres, salt, pepper, garlic, and worchester sauce. apply liberally and rub in both sides, making sure the board has a baste of the rub/mix as well. cover with italian dressing. barbeque at about 225 indirect heat for 2 hours. carefully remove the board and carp, discard the carp and eat the board…..
LOL…sorry, had to go there once tree mentioned carp…
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May 19th, 2008 at 12:59 pm
Good one there, thrill. I too was wondering how the hell you make carp taste like anything worth eating.