Kickoff
Jul 23, 2008 BFD's Real Doll, Duane Brown as Eliza Doolittle, Fuck the Cowboys, Kickoff, Teams that aren't the Texans
Super-quick Kickoff this morning as Matt doesn’t have intertubez access and I have a super-busy day at my real job. Here goes:
Moves: So, yeah, lots of roster moves yesterday. But you already knew that didn’t you Mr(s). Smarty Pants?
No need to panic: “BornOrange” at texanstalk.com did some research and noticed a trend that the Texans have a tendency to sign their top pick, Mario excluded, right at the start of training camp. We’ve seen a couple more first round picks sign, Kenny Phillips being one of those, so I think we’re getting close. Kudos to BornOrange for some nice research. (h/t Eric)
Training Camp: And remember, it’s just around the corner! In other words, Duane? You have a couple of days to sign that contract. You can’t afford to miss a single snap in camp.
Wha?: Is it me? Or is sending Jeremy Shockey to New Orleans the wrong destination? Not like New York is Utah or anything, but such easy access to alcohol? And the ego battles with The Most Expensive Third Down Back in History? This might be fun!
Tuna Slam: I’ve never really had a fond place in my heart for Bill Parcells, but I do now after he said this about Jessica Simpson’s wife:
All you got to do is kick a field goal, the most elementary of plays, and then you just don’t do it. And so I don’t want to go through that process again. Too much blood.
Tony Romo = Epic fail.
I’m wearing pants! What are you wearing?
(click arrow to reply)
July 23rd, 2008 at 9:34 am
Great research by “BornOrange” but, it causing one to look at most of those names and break out in cold sweats and relive the old nightmares, after much therapy!
(click arrow to reply)
July 23rd, 2008 at 9:47 am
I’m not sure what Parcells means by “too much blood,” but I still love that quote. “Too much blood.” I hope that becomes a thing.
(click arrow to reply)
July 23rd, 2008 at 10:02 am
“I’m wearing pants! What are you wearing?”
??
A little Jamisons with your coffee this morning BFD?
(click arrow to reply)
July 23rd, 2008 at 11:14 am
@Tyler: It’s more likely that he actually added a little coffee to his Jameson’s.
(click arrow to reply)
July 23rd, 2008 at 11:15 am
Money says that Shockey gives Kim the high hard one just to screw with Reggie. That, and she’s really really easy.
(click arrow to reply)
July 23rd, 2008 at 11:17 am
@Shake: What’s this “coffee” that you speak of?
(click arrow to reply)
July 23rd, 2008 at 12:41 pm
@Tyler: What can I say? I hate pants!
-
@Vega:
Marge: I’ll just have a cup of coffee.
Bartender: Beer it is.
Marge: No, I said coffee.
Bartender: Beer.
Marge: Cof-fee.
Bartender: Be-er.
Marge: (spells) C-O…
Bartender: (spells) B-E…
(click arrow to reply)
July 23rd, 2008 at 1:24 pm
@bigfatdrunk: I am wearing shorts today. At work. My job may suck, but the dress code rules.
(click arrow to reply)
July 23rd, 2008 at 1:56 pm
@Matt: Sorry to hear that my comment about you wearing fancypants the other day fell on deaf and dumb ears.
Stupid ears.
(click arrow to reply)
July 23rd, 2008 at 5:27 pm
Irish creme coffee. Yum. And wearing shorts at work rules!
(click arrow to reply)
July 23rd, 2008 at 7:27 pm
What is the coolest job you can wear shorts to? I think it’s a lifeguard. Shorts, flip flops and sunglasses. Hard to beat.
(click arrow to reply)
July 23rd, 2008 at 7:51 pm
@Txnpwrlifter: I think that underwear models might trump lifeguards.
(click arrow to reply)
July 23rd, 2008 at 9:25 pm
@Foomey: Not true since underwear models sometimes have to wear me. And do you know how hard it is to accessorize with a short, fat, drunk, bald guy?
(click arrow to reply)
July 24th, 2008 at 8:18 am
@bigfatdrunk: I heard “short, fat, drunk, and bald” was the new black.
(click arrow to reply)
July 24th, 2008 at 2:08 pm
@Matt: That’s no way to go through life, son.
(click arrow to reply)
July 24th, 2008 at 2:36 pm
@bigfatdrunk: My question is…Are you worn in the front, or in the rear?
(click arrow to reply)
July 24th, 2008 at 2:37 pm
@bigfatdrunk: P(i)ss:Interpret question as you wish.
(click arrow to reply)
July 26th, 2008 at 8:09 am
Dave and I are planning on heading to NO for a Rockets/Hornets game this year. I’m pretty sure we’ll find Shockey passed out on the street somewhere