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Breaking News: Reggie Bush still scared of Mario

Aug 14, 2008 Demarcus Faggins sucks, Reggie Bush, Reggie Bush shat himself, Secondary issues are primary, Teams that aren't the Texans

To no one’s surprise, Reggie Bush has begged out of Saturday’s game against the Texans due to an, ahem, “knee injury.”

Coach Sean Payton said that “Poor Reggie has been crying during walkthroughs all week.  We had to assign Richard Justice to follow him and clean his accidental piddles.  We believe it best for all parties that he sit out this week’s games.  The little fellow just can’t face Mario again.”*

Bush is expected to be healthy for the third preseason game and contribute his stellar 1.9 YPC to the offense.

* May or may not be true

This entry was posted on Thursday, August 14th, 2008 at 7:28 pm and is filed under Demarcus Faggins sucks, Reggie Bush, Reggie Bush shat himself, Secondary issues are primary, Teams that aren't the Texans. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Both comments and pings are currently closed.

9 Responses to “Breaking News: Reggie Bush still scared of Mario”

  1. Jordan
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    August 14th, 2008 at 8:01 pm

    I guess mario did use bush as a bushwhacker.


  2. Matt
    (click arrow to reply)Reply to this comment
    August 14th, 2008 at 8:09 pm

    This is awesome. “Coach…uh…my, um, patellariscus is, uh, tweaked. I think. That’s what the trainer said. So, yeah…you know…probably shouldn’t play. I’ll be all good next week, though!”


  3. James
    (click arrow to reply)Reply to this comment
    August 14th, 2008 at 8:44 pm

    Looks like christmas has come early for Lil Dickie Justice:
    http://blogs.chron.com/sportsjustice/archives/2008/08/sure_there_have.html
    I love how he equates Vince Winning the National Championship 4 years ago is the same as if we had discovered that Dogs can talk. I am sure that tonite he and Pancakes are not sleeping in separate beds.


  4. Vega
    (click arrow to reply)Reply to this comment
    August 14th, 2008 at 8:51 pm

    @James: That. Was. Awesome. There is no question in my mind that Justice was drunk and naked when he wrote that.


  5. Vega
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    August 14th, 2008 at 8:51 pm

    @James: When pressed for comment Young said that it was an honor having his jersey retired since he never liked wearing shirts anyway.


  6. Demecoshallinherittheearth
    (click arrow to reply)Reply to this comment
    August 14th, 2008 at 8:57 pm

    @James: Justice has a point. UT only retires the numbers of very special athletes. That’s why they’re also hanging up the jersey of a guy who only played there for one year because he had to and who couldn’t get them out of the second round of the NCAA tournament.


  7. Vega
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    August 14th, 2008 at 9:02 pm

    @James:

    Vince Young did things on a football field that made grown men cry. He brought happiness to millions, made their boring lives worth living.

    He also helped feed the poor and helped teach our children how to read. Sadly, we’re now plagued with a large population of dyslexic children with dysentery.


  8. James
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    August 14th, 2008 at 9:45 pm

    The amazing thing is how blinded by Orange Justice and the rest of the Comical is. They never question Mack Brown or any of the moves he makes and when it comes to Vince they are always ready with an excuse as to why he hasn’t improved


  9. Demecoshallinherittheearth
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    August 14th, 2008 at 9:53 pm

    There will never be another one like him.
    If there is, our nation’s literacy centers aren’t doing their jobs.
    I’m probably like a lot of you in that when I’m feeling down or have had a bad day at work I put in the DVD of that Rose Bowl. No matter how many times I watch it, I’m still inspired by it, moved by it.
    Did he just admit to masturbating to the Rose Bowl to cheer himself up?
    He’s admired for his football accomplishments, but also for his charitable heart and his dignity.
    Nothing says dignity like shirtless party pictures. Like the one that Dickie Justice has hanging above his bed.