DGDB&D: a Texans blog.

Get off my lawn!

Mar 16, 2008 2007 Draft, Beer, Grumpy Old Men, I really dig my readers, Jacoby Jones is slighty less unheralded, Jacoby Jones' beer bong

According to various sources (most notably, reader Eric who alerted us to the “rumor” at 11:30am), Jacoby Jones was arrested early this morning for driving while intoxicated.

Of course, the team has no comment until the facts come out. Which means that Gary and Co. will issue a “we’re really disappointed in Jacoby, but he has told us that he’s sorry” statement in a day or two. And that’s fine, I suppose; I mean, if this is the worst thing that our players do all offseason, we’ve gotten off light by today’s NFL standards. And, yes, JJ is only 23 and this is the type of stupid, youthful thing that 23-year-olds do frequently in the real world. I get that.

All that said, however, I would think that a punt returner/4th receiver who had a great preseason and a forgettable regular season (and who already lost half of his special teams duties to the Special Teams Ninja) would do his best to avoid doing anything stupid. I mean, we all love Jacoby (some of us to alarming degrees), but we don’t love him in the same, wouldn’t-trade-him-for-anyone way that we love DeJesus, Mario, and Andre. No, our love for Jones is of the “wow…this kid might just be something someday” variety. That’s not a hard love to forget if it goes unrequited for very long.

No, I am not saying that I am done with Jacoby. He’s not Travis Johnson or anything; I don’t hate him with the hot burning intensity of a thousand suns. I still want to believe the hype and I want him to wind up being great. More importantly, though, I want him to want to be great and to act like he wants to be great. Shape up, kid.

God, I feel old.

A dog’s got personality. Personality goes a long way.

Mar 11, 2008 2004 Draft, 2006 Draft, 2007 Draft, 2008 Combine, 2008 Draft, 2008 Season, Amobi Okoye is 20, Corky Johnson, DeMeco Ryans, Demarcus Faggins sucks, Huh?, Jason Babin, Morlon Greenwood, Posts that list too many players, Pulp Fiction, Rendhel and Sid, Teams that aren't the Texans

It is not much of an exaggeration to say that I have seen Pulp Fiction at least 500 times. My freshman-year roommate had a copy (VHS, baby!) stolen from Blockbuster, which we watched almost daily for that entire year, and I’ve continued to watch it more frequently than any other movie over the past decade. I am reasonably sure this says something about me, but I’m not sure what it is.¹

Anyway…I mention this as background because, by this point, you’d think nothing could surprise me in that film. You’d be wrong.

So, here’s the deal. When the guy who looks somewhat like Jerry Seinfeld comes out of the bathroom and shoots at Vince and Jules, why in the hell did he have that gun in the bathroom with him in the first place?

Hear me out–clearly, Brett and “Flock of Seagulls” were not expecting Marsellus’ guys to show up at that instant, as they were enjoying Big Kahuna Burgers² and just otherwise chilling. Seagulls was lying on the couch and, one assumes, did not have a gun within easy reach. Brett, likewise, was seemingly unarmed. The look of terror on both of their faces suggests that, had they been expecting a visit from Jules and Vince, they would certainly have been armed and ready to shoot for their lives. I mean, Brett seems to know from the moment Marvin opens the door that he is probably going to die. If you had ripped off a crime kingpin and were expecting hitmen to show up and kill you, would you be more likely to sit and eat burgers or arm yourself and prepare to shoot back?

Besides, on top of the surprise factor, you have the size of the gun. It was, as Vincent pointed out, “a goddamned hand cannon.” Such a gun is not the type that someone would have cavalierly tucked in his waistband, nor was he wearing a holster. So basically, logic dictates that he either picked up the gun and carried into the bathroom or the gun was already in the bathroom. Neither of these situations really makes sense to me. On the one hand, if Brett and Seagulls were not expecting Vince and Jules to arrive, there’s no reason to think Guy in Bathroom would have suspected it enough to carry a large handgun into the crapper. Likewise, I can see no reason why that gun would already be in the bathroom considering the people out in the living room did not have guns within easy reach.

By now, you are probably thinking “what the hell does this have to do with football?” Simple: I had been blindly accepting the situation as it was presented to me, when I should have been considering the context. Because, once you consider the context, some things that seem to make sense really don’t.³

Which brings me (finally) to the draft.

Over the past days and weeks, many people have come to grips with the idea that the Texans are probably taking a CB with the 18th pick in the draft. On the surface, where you have an injured Dunta Robinson; a horrid Petey Faggins; a possibly-horrid Jacques Reeves; and are relying on a second-year corner and a veteran sex machine safety, it would seem logically sound to take a corner and hope to improve your atrocious secondary. It would seem that way until you really consider the context.

Right now, you can easily claim that our holes on defense are NT, DE2, CB2, SLB, and (possibly) SS. Of those holes, CB2 is the one where we have already spent the most cap space this offseason, albeit on a guy who might not be able to cover me for 4 seconds. Does it make sense to use your draft pick on a guy who play the same position as the guy you just overpaid for?

But that’s not even the biggest issue.

The fact is, a great defensive line can make a suspect secondary look average to good for multiple games in a season. A fantastic secondary can make an average D-line look good a couple times per game. Partly, this is because of the nature of the rules that allow WRs to play virtually untouched. But it is also due in no small part to the logistics of what the positions are asked to do. Your defensive line exists to get to the QB (or RB), correct? Well, they know where the QB is going to be once the ball is snapped. Defensive backs, on the other hand, are asked to cover someone with no clue as to where he is going or what path he will take to get there. This means that even the best CBs are going to get beat on a long enough timeline. SO–and I know you see where I am going with this–you can improve your secondary just as much by drastically shortening the length of time you ask them to cover as by upgrading your cornerbacks.

Hell, this year’s Super Bowl Champion New York Giants are an embodiment of this principle. Their monster defensive line was able to consistently get pressure on opposing QBs. Because of this, the Giants were able to survive with subpar linebackers (Pierce is a good player, but his main strength is in leadership and getting the D set correctly; Mitchell is a smart player and a sure tackler but is nothing special; and Torbor is notably below average, but tough) and an average defensive backfield. Corey Webster looks like he turned it around, but he still isn’t very good yet. Aaron Ross looked very good for a rookie, but Gibril Wilson is at best good (in terms of skills he’s probably comparable to a healthy Will Demps, maybe very slightly better) and James Butler more or less stinks.

Yet, despite having a back seven that was basically average, the Giants defense looked absolutely dominant at times–including against the Patriots–because they were able to get after opposing QBs on a regular basis. This is not a novel concept, really. And, given the choice, I would almost always rather go into a season with three great defensive lineman than with 2 great defensive linemen and a great DB. And, hell, with Ryans and Greenwood behind a line similar to the Giants, even Petey Faggins would seem decent at cornerback.

*Pauses to consider the implications of that last sentence. Shudders.*

WHICH (finally) brings me to my bigger point. Namely that, if we are drafting defense in the first round or third round, we should be looking for a defensive tackle or a speedy defensive end or–shockingly–both. I mean, clearly someone in Texans management thought that Reeves could play or else they wouldn’t have signed him. You want to make that signing make sense? Then put together a front four that can limit how long he has to cover. The kid has fantastic speed, but his instincts and coverage skills are not all that amazing. Ask him to cover for 2.5 seconds instead of 4.5 and his speed/quickness should be able to overcome his technique/skills. Unless, that is, someone thought it prudent to give $8MM guaranteed for a nickel corner. Which I choose to believe no one in our front office is stupid enough to do.

[Author's note: I realize that some of this--ok, fine, much of this--is a rehashing of the philosophy I've been espousing since the end of the season. I was pushing for a NT at that time and, for the most part, my position hasn't changed. I have only amended it to say that I would be nearly as happy with a solid DE and that the only CB I would be willing to change my opinion for would be the mutant Rodgers-Cromartie.]

Who, then, should we be looking at? I’m glad you asked. Two names that immediately jump out to me are Brian Johnston and Kentwan Balmer.

Last one first, let’s take a look at Balmer, since most of you have probably heard of him. A 6-5, 308 DT out of UNC, Balmer posted 59 tackles (33 solos), including 3.5 sacks, 9.5 TFL, and four quarterback pressures. Balmer was solid against the run in general, allowing 1.69 yards/carry on his 55 running stops. The one knock I would have against him is that he is about 15 lbs lighter (minimum) than I would like out of my NT, but that is countered by the fact that he is strong (33 reps) and explosive (29 in. vertical jump). Even better for our purposes, Balmer is currently projected to go in the late first/early second, meaning he should be available at 18. Speaking of that 18th pick, I think even if most teams have Balmer slotted at 25-30, we should be willing to reach a little if we find a guy we really want because of the lack of a second rounder.

The other guy I mentioned, Brian Johnston, might be unfamiliar to many of you. That’s what happens when you go to Gardner-Webb and don’t get a combine invite. Of course, after reading about his tryout in front of some NFL scouts, maybe he should have been invited.

Measuring in at 6-foot-5, 274 pounds, Johnston ran his first 40-yard dash in 4.66 seconds. Johnston’s 40-yard dash time would have been the fourth best at the NFL combine for defensive ends, and the best for any lineman weighing more than 260 pounds.

Johnston’s most impressive stat from the 40-yard dash came with a very strong 1.51-second time through the first 10 yards, an important time with regards to a players quickness. By comparison, Johnston’s 10-yard split was the same as Arkansas’ running back Darren McFadden turned in at the Combine earlier this year.

The most impressive result overall, however, may have been Johnston’s time in the 20-yard shuttle. He turned in a 4.18-second time, which is better than any lineman at the NFL’s Scouting Combine. In fact, the 4.18-second time was faster than any running back at the event - with Illinois’ Rashard Mendenhall the only back to match that time.

So, yeah…I’d say he fits the definition of a speed-rushing DE. Now, I know some of you are likely saying “ACK! Workout warrior from a small school! Babin! BABIN!!!” That’s fair. But let’s not forget that Babin was a college 4-3 DE drafted to play OLB in an NFL 3-4. Going forward was never a problem for him; it was sideline to sideline and dropping into TE coverage that killed him. In Johnston’s case, you would be drafting a college 4-3 DE speed-rusher to play NFL 4-3 DE speed-rusher. And, because Mario and Okoye occupy the extra blockers, he’d be going one-on-one with o-linemen most of the time. That’s always nice when you are lightning-fast.

ANYWAY, I am just spitballing here. If the word around the campfire is to be believed, we will take someone like Aqib Talib at 18 and then a RB in the third. And I’ll deal with it, even if I don’t think it is the right approach. And, hell, maybe I get kinda lucky and we take Talib (or whomever) in the first but still snag Johnston in the third. Regardless, until Draft Day, I am just going to keep doing my best to shepherd the weak through the valley of darkness.⁴

¹ That’s not entirely true. I think it says that I liked the movie when it was (a) popular, (b) cliched, (c) ironic, and (d) suggestive that I am getting old.

² That IS a tasty burger!

³ On the flip-side, some things that seem utterly inexplicable–say, the selection of Mario Williams over Reggie Bush–make perfect sense once you consider the context. While some things–say, the popularity of Mambo No. 5–remain inexplicable regardless of how much you ponder them.

⁴ And to not shoot Marvin in the face.

Maybe he could catch it from Romo?

Dec 9, 2007 2007 Draft, 2007 Season, 2008 Draft, Predictions Guaranteed To Go Wrong, Sucks to be John Fox, Super Bowl 2008

I completely forgot about my picks this week because, for some odd reason, I was actually busy at work. (I usually use the picks to eat up Thursday morning.) Thankfully–I think–three people either emailed or otherwise contacted me to remind me about them. Gracias.

Last week: 8-7

Season: 111-76

Week 14 Picks

Miami @ Buffalo. Take heart, Dolphins fans, it could be worse. I’m not sure how, exactly, but it could be. Like Jason Taylor could contract AIDS and then, on his way to the clinic, be run down by a bus full of white supremacists, who then proceed to violate his corpse. That would be worse, right? Pick: Buffalo

Dallas @ Detroit. God’s old favorite team against his new favorite. No one seems to be asking the important question, though–why would God switch allegiances like that? I don’t know, but I assume it has something to do with Tony Romo being gay. Pick: Dallas

Carolina @ Jacksonville. We are about one piss-poor performance away from John Fox walking into the weight room with 45 pounds of C-4 strapped to himself. Pick: Jacksonville

Oakland @ Green Bay. So, at this point, I have to wonder: what kind of injury would it take to keep Brett Favre from starting? Because I get the feeling that he saw Kevin Everett was going to miss the rest of the year and thought “pussy.” Basically, I think anything short of “double-amputee in a coma” and he is at worst questionable. Pick: Green Bay

St. Louis @ Cincinnati. The best thing to come out of this season of picks is that I no longer try to spell Cincinnati as “Cincinatti.” I’m an idiot. Pick: Cincinnati

San Diego @ Tennessee. There’s a decent chance that these two teams will meet again in San Diego in the first round of the playoffs. That’s not important, though. What is important is that LaDainian Tomlinson makes Albert Haynesworth his punk bitch. And if Shawn Merriman or Shaun Phillips can injure Vince Young, that’s an added bonus. Pick: San Diego

Tampa Bay @ JUGGERNAUT. Part of me feels like I should pick against Houston just to try and break the string of bad luck. Another part feels like any sane person (which I decidedly am not) would be hoping for losses right now, just to improve draft positioning. A third part feels like I need to poop. I’m going to listen to the third one and ignore the other two. Pick: Houston

New York Giants @ Philadelphia. All week, people have been talking about the last meeting, in which New York registered roughly 173 sacks. Boooooring. What I want to talk about is that the people of Philadelphia are apparently racist. There is no other way I can think of to explain the love affair with AJ Feely. Pick: New York Giants

Arizona @ Seahawks. God, I hate these NFC West matchups. It’s like watching the Special Olympics. Which reminds me…you know what’s better than winning a gold in the Special Olympics? Not being retarded. (I’m going to hell.) Pick: Seattle

Minnesota @ San Francisco. I don’t know about you, but I welcome our new Purple overlords. Pick: Minnesota

Cleveland @ New York Jets. Hey, Derek Anderson. It’s all well and good that you’ve become a great QB. Really, the people in Cleveland are thrilled. Imagine how much happier everyone would be this season if they hadn’t mortgaged the 2008 first round pick in order to get Brady Quinn. Thanks for doing this a year too late. Dick. Pick: Cleveland

Kansas City @ Denver. Ah, an old fashioned battle for mediocrity. This is what football is all about. If you are a Chiefs fan, I mean. Pick: Denver

Pittsburgh @ New England. So, just so I am clear, if New England goes undefeated, they will have played Dallas, Indy, and Pittsburgh in the regular season and likely faced at least one of those AFC teams again in the playoffs? If they go 19-0, I am fully willing to call them the best team ever. Pick: New England

Indianapolis @ Baltimore. I didn’t think it was possible, but Bart Scott made Ray Lewis look completely sane. Be afraid, Baltimorons. Be very afraid. (Note: I have no idea what people from Baltimore are actually called.) Pick: Indianapolis

New Orleans @ Atlanta. “Hey, Steve. Can you come in here for a second? You know when we let you schedule the Monday Night games before the season started? Well, remember how a whole bunch of us told you that the New Orleans/Atlanta game was going to blow ass? You’re fired, you mouth-breathing fuck.” Pick: New Orleans

“Down the road a-ways,” I’ve heard said, “a new day’s comin’ on.”

Dec 2, 2007 2006 Draft, 2007 Draft, 2007 Season, 2008 Draft, Andre Johnson, Batman, Curious Coaching, DeMeco Ryans, Pro Bowl 2008, Richard Justice is a talentless hack., Ron Dayne likes pie, Secondary issues are primary, Super Mario, The Schaub Experiment

I’m not really sure where to start. I actually felt ill watching the second half unfold. For everything that went right–Mario Williams, DeMeco Ryans, Andre Johnson–it seemed like just as many if not more went wrong–season-crippling injuries, poor special teams, poor run defense, continual mental mistakes.

One could easily argue that this game was a microcosm of our entire season, so let’s approach the recap that way.

The continued development of Mario Williams. The continued, Fox-News-like insistence of Richard Justice aside, most people agree that Mario has progressed well in his first full healthy season. After notching three sacks in his first seven games, Super Mario scored three in the past four games prior to today. So, all he does today is come in, put up a new personal single game high two and a half sacks (one was a gimme), and break the franchise single-season sack record. He is currently two sacks away from the franchise career record of 15 (Kylie Wong).

The continued excellence of DeMeco Ryans. His 14 total tackles today–a season high–pushed him over 100 for the season and gave him three straight games (and five total games this season) with at least 10 total tackles. Week in, week out, the one consistent thing about this team is DeMeco. If he doesn’t make the Pro Bowl this season, it will be a complete traveshamockery.

The continued demonstration of how much Andre Johnson means to this offense. This doesn’t need much explanation. Basically, Andre gives us a WR who, when healthy, is almost always good for 8-10 catches, 110+ yards, and a TD or two. More importantly, though, is that he catches nearly every ball thrown at him, regardless of how good a pass it really was. He is so good that I was actually shocked when he didn’t haul in the pass from Sage Rosenfels down around the ten yard line, despite the fact that catching it would have required him to stop on a dime, spin back 180 degrees, and snag a ball that was thrown at his back shoulder.

The continued enigma that is Ron Dayne. Don’t look at me; I’m as confused as you. In the first eight games of the year, Dayne played in six. Of those, only once did he crack three yards/carry. His single game high during that stretch was 62 yards. Since then, however, he’s been nothing short of, um, well above average. He’s been over four yards/carry every game, and he’s put up 122, 89, 78, and 86 yards respectively. Just when it was concede by nearly everyone involved in football that we had no running game whatsoever, the Dayne Trayne got on track and proved nearly everyone wrong. Perhaps the strangest thing about this, though, is that I still have no desire to go into next season with Ron Dayne occupying a prominent role in this offense.

The continued inability to beat the Tennessee Titans. 10-2. That’s the all-time record between the Titans the Texans. We have been beaten by Steve McNair six times, Vince Young three times, and Kerry Collins once. We have not beaten them since 2004, when we inexplicably beat them twice. It does not seem to matter who is under center for them or for us. It doesn’t matter how well or poorly we play. It doesn’t even matter how late in the game we manage to hold a lead. It defies explanation, yet somehow it defines much of the past 5-plus seasons. And now, it’s cost me two bottles of Jagermeister. Good times.

The continued plague of injuries. OK, now it’s just getting ridiculous. We can add Fred Weary (broken leg) and Chris White (injured MCL) to this list of players lost for the year, raising that total to 15. And that doesn’t even count Ahman Green, who has yet to finish a single game; or Matt Schaub, who has been knocked from games more than once and who might now be lost for the year with a dislocated shoulder; or Andre Johnson, who missed eight of our 12 games with a completely avoidable injury; or any of the myriad other players who have been listed as “questionable” or worse this season.

The continued sieve that passes as run defense. The 153 yards allowed to the Titans today was even worse than the 119 yards/game average we allowed coming in. In fact, we went from 22nd in the league to 25th in rushing yards allowed/game based on today’s (lack of) performance. In fact, this probably deserves its own post at some point.

The continued struggles on special teams. Early in the year, there were issues with Kris Brown (see, e.g., the Atlanta game). Then, we had issues with kickoff returns while Jacoby Jones was out (see, e.g., the first Titans game, when Andre Davis decided that kicks 9 yards deep in the end zone were still worth bringing out). Then, it was Matt Turk channeling Chad Stanley (see, e.g., the San Diego game). Today, it was Jacoby deciding that fair catches were for girls…until he muffed one that effectively ended our chances at winning the game. Oh, and let’s not forget the stupid holding penalty that negated our own recovery of a Tennessee muff (which sounds dirty, but isn’t). He’s not Richard Smith-level bad, but special teams coach Joe Marciano isn’t exactly doing a bang-up job.

The continued mental mistakes of both players and coaches. Sage Rosenfels‘ curious decision to run back toward the middle of the field at the end of the game, Richard Smith’s wussified decision not to blitz near the end of the game despite being shown repeatedly that the blitz was working while the “rush three” defense was being eaten alive (on the big completion to Eric Moulds, for example), Jacoby Merkel’s aforementioned boner, Kubiak’s odd insistence about making Vonta Leach an integral part of the running and passing game, and so on and so forth. Is it possible to get through one game–just one–where we aren’t left scratching our heads at the decision-making?

Today’s loss was just another dose of variations on any number of themes. Unfortunately, it is also the end of any realistic chance of a playoff appearance. Now, the more cynical among us might say that the playoffs were never an attainable goal this season. While that is debatable, what is not arguable is that the games are always more meaningful when you can delude yourself into thinking January football is a possibility. Without that, all we have is another year of draft talk in December.

I don’t want to be all doom and gloom. Certainly, we have pieces in place that should lead to a successful 2008 and beyond. This team is sitting in a better position than any version of the Texans that we’ve seen. We know what works on this team and, just as importantly, we know what doesn’t. Still, right now (and until I am sufficiently un-angered), I can’t help but say it over and over in my head. “Same old, same old.”

Amobi: "[W]e are world champions. That’s not far off at all."

Oct 12, 2007 2007 Draft, Amobi Okoye is 20, National Media, Teams that aren't the Texans

USA Today has a rookie profile on our resident bust, Amobi Okoye. Most of it is the same stuff we’ve seen a thousand times–he’s 20, he moved here from Nigeria, he tested into 9th grade at 12, yada yada yada.

In the part of the profile titled “The Person,” however, Manchild gives some fantastic quotes:

• Biggest adjustment: “I know it wasn’t the speed of the game. I’d say the off-field stuff, trying to handle the demands and trying to balance your life, especially as a first-rounder.”

• Role model: “My father. From day one he met his obligation as a father. He put his family first in everything.”

• First purchase after signing: “My mom’s car. It’s a white Benz that I promised her ever since I can remember.”

• Favorite off-field activity: “Probably being around family and friends who care about me, having a good time and smiling.”

• On not being old enough to drink: “No, I’m not old enough to drink. It’s a blessing because I’m around a lot of older guys who care about me and want to see me succeed. I’ve been around older people all my life.”

• Life after football: “I’d like to work with kids in one way or another. I want to give back to the community.”

• On the Texans: “Man, I see this city rocking because we are world champions. That’s not far off at all.”

• NFL dream: “I left the game better than it was when I got into it. I was someone anyone coming up playing football could look up to. I was an ambassador for football.”

Awesome.

As an aside, the other player mentioned in that Mike Florio “article” about Amobi being a bust was Adam Carriker. Through the Rams (winless) first five games, Carriker has 5 tackles and no sacks. None. Proving, yet again, that Mike Florio and PFT are beyond worthless. That’s one thing BBS and I can agree on.

Arrows cost money. Use up the Irish; their dead cost nothing.

Sep 24, 2007 2007 Draft, 2007 Season, Injury bug, Jacoby Jones is slighty less unheralded, Offensive (punch)Line

Oh, gee, more outstanding news from yesterday’s game. And, by “outstanding,” I mean “shitacular.” Starting C Steve McKinney is out for the season with a torn ACL.

Obviously, Mike Flanagan will fill in for McKinney, with Chris White backing up Flanagan. My hope is that the team uses this chance to develop another Center and my money is on Kasey Studdard or Brandon Frye (currently on the practice squad). Of the two, I would prefer Studdard, though my primary reason is because I think Frye is better suited for Guard (or even Tackle). Besides, Studdard has “a mean streak,” which I think means that he will not hesitate to lay the pimp hand on any motherfucker that crosses him.

In other injury-plagued news, the separated shoulder Jacoby Jones suffered on his 74-yard punt return yesterday is going to keep him sidelined “two or three weeks.” With any luck, Jerome Mathis will slide into the PR duties so that we don’t have to deal with Dexter Wynn for “two or three weeks” of punt returning.

The only monster here is the gambling monster that has enslaved your mother. I call him Gamblor!

Sep 12, 2007 2007 Draft, Is Roger Goodell gonna have to choke a bitch?, My Officemate is a Fucking Twit, Predictions Guaranteed To Go Wrong, Teams that aren't the Texans, Winner winner chicken dinner

Ah, week 2. Before you know it, Halloween will be here, the Browns will have been eliminated from playoff contention, and Trent Green will have a concussion. It’s all as regular as the tides. For now, however, in the final days of summer, the only thing you get are my half-assed game predictions.

Last week: 9-6
Season: 9-6

Week 2 Picks

Cincinnati @ Cleveland. Let’s see… the Browns gave up 34 points (including 4 passing TDs for Ben Roethlisberger) last week. And, last I checked, the Bengals had a much better passing attack than do the Steelers. Over/under on the number of heteroquestionable pictures we see of Brady Quinn this week? 21.5. Pick: Cincinnati

Indianapolis @ Tennessee. OK, so I was WAY off about the Titans’ ability to move the ball last week. I admit it. I still don’t know why the Jags didn’t stack the box and force Vince (11-18, 72 YDS, INT) to beat them with his arm, but whatever. This week, the Colts come to town armed with (a) two WRs that Tennessee won’t be able to stop and (b) a faster defense. Vince took a couple sacks last week, but he’ll taste Dwight Freeney’s this week. Pick: Indy

San Francisco @ St. Louis. For the last time… it was an end around that the Niners used against Arizona, not a friggin’ reverse. [/kicking Barbaro] Now that we have that out of the way, can I point out just how awful St. Louis looked last week? Sure, Jackson won’t fumble twice every week or get your fantasy team zero points (jerk), but losing Orlando Pace isn’t exactly going to improve the passing game. And this “revamped” St. Louis defense (186 rushing yds and 20 first downs allowed) isn’t likely to slow down Frank Gore. Pick: San Francisco

Green Bay @ New York Giants. As a general rule, if you are the type of person who would come into an occupied room and eat Gardettos without demonstrating the slightest concern for just how loudly you are chewing, I probably hate you. Just sayin’. Pick: Green Bay

Buffalo @ Pittsburgh. I’m still angry that so many random “power” rankings have us below Buffalo this week, so fuck them. Pick: Pittsburgh.

New Orleans @ Tampa Bay. After last week, people were fleeing the Saints’ bandwagon like rats from a flooding French Quarter. (Too soon?) After this week, a lot of them will come back like hookers and bums to a rebuilt Bourbon St. This game presents a great chance for everyone’s favorite second-string RB to try and improve on his yards/carry and maybe, you know, get a rushing TD. Pick: Saints

HOUSTON JUGGERNAUT @ Carolina. OK, so I predicted this one as a loss in my 9-wins countdown, with the caveat that my prediction was subject to change if Zoolander started the game. Well, Sandy will continue clipboarding, but I am starting to think this game will be tightly contested. Consider: the current Vegas line is Carolina (-6.5). Assuming that all home teams give three points (a fairly safe figure), Sin City says that Carolina is just over a FG better than us on a neutral field. I suppose this sounds about right, but I am way too fucking drunk on the Kool-Aid to pick against us yet. Pick: Roll, Juggernaut!

Minnesota @ Detroit. Both of these teams are looking for their first win of the seas–. What? They are both 1-0? You’re bullshitting me. Seriously? Like, seriously seriously? How the hell… oh well, fuck it. Pick: Minnesota

Atlanta @ Jacksonville. Three things I would do if I had a time machine. (1) Get down with Audrey Hepburn circa 1960, (2) invent the Pet Rock a week before the other guy did it, and (3) change my prediction that Jacksonville would win 9 or 10 games. Still, if you get destroyed by Tavaris Jackson and Adrian Peterson, you probably won’t fare much better against David Garrard and MoJo Drew. Pick: Jacksonville

Dallas @ Miami. Dear The Fans of the Miami Dolphins, Eli Manning and Co. hung 35 points on the Cowgirls depleted secondary last week. If Trent Green does not get you at least 24, you should probably consider calling it a season. You always have jai alai to watch, though, so all is not lost. Sincerely, Matt. P.S. Feed the ball to Ronnie Brown. Please. Pick: Dallas

Seattle @ Arizona. I’ve said it before; I’ll say it again. Matt Leinart is simply Scott Mitchell with a much better sex life. He also looks less adept at throwing on the run than Stephen Hawking would be. Pick: Seattle

Kansas City @ Chicago. If you live anywhere between Ohio and Colorado, odds are you are being subjected to this game. Not that our defense isn’t fairly good, but if Houston holds your all world RB to 43 yards, the Bears probably won’t struggle too much against your ground game. The only question in this game is if Lovie gets fed up with Ced Benson and (the other) Adrian Peterson enough to give Garrett Wolfe some reps. The only person who can lead the Chiefs to victory in this one is Rex Grossman. Pick: Chicago

Oakland @ Denver. Did you know Josh McCown was 30-40 passing last week? Wild. And the Raiders actually, like, scored points and stuff. They still lost–some things never change–but they were in the game until the fourth quarter. Of course, that was against Detroit. Denver, led by scramblin’ Jay Cutler will not be so accommodating. Also, as a public service announcement, I would just like to remind all Oakland fans traveling to this game to make sure your female companions are on birth control; Travis Henry can impregnate with a stare. Pick: Denver

New York Jets @ Baltimore. To quote my Ravens-fan friend Orlando: “Six turnovers, 7 passes thrown over the heads of receivers, robbed of a TD by a horrible call, another horrible call on an interception that bounced on the ground (and not within the control of the defender), 8 chances to score from the 5 yard line, and injuries to [Jon Ogden] and Ray-Ray…and still we had chances to win. There lies the agony of being a Raven’s fan, we are too good to fire Billick, but too bad to ever be comfortable with him at the helm.” That’s rough. Pick: New York

San Diego @ New England. Whoever first said “cheaters never win” is a motherfucking liar. Just ask the Pats. (Side note: Firefox recognizes the word “motherfucker” as being correctly spelled.) My question is, why does the list of possible punishments not include forfeiting the game in which they cheated? Taking away a 3rd round pick won’t do shit; making the current standing say “Patriots 0-1″ certainly would. While we are talking about cheaters getting caught, lets not forget Shawne Merriman. Oh, wait, this is football. We don’t care if someone used steroids. Pick: New England

Washington @ Philadelphia. I was going to write something insightful and witty here, but the twit who shares my office is whining into her phone because she’s a fucking moron. (And because someone said something kind of mean to her, likely because she’s a fucking moron.) I’m outta here. Pick: Washington

Lisfranc? Is that French? We call it "Freedom foot."

Aug 13, 2007 2007 Draft, Injury bug, Ohio State makes baby Jesus cry, Preseason 2007, Secondary issues are primary, Van Crap, Von

By now, you’ve no doubt heard that starting strong safety Glenn Earl is lost for the season (at minimum–Lisfranc injuries can be exceedingly hard to come back from). Now, while the secondary was thin to begin with, I am going to go out on a limb here and say that this injury was a good thing for the team. Addition by subtraction, if you will.

It’s not that Earl was bad. He is passably decent against the run and can deliver a big hit from time to time.¹ Of course, he also got destroyed Saturday night by a truck called Cedric Benson, so he’s not exactly Ronnie Lott.

The real problem is the current tandem of Earl and C.C. Brown gives the Texans no true free safety. Brown is better served in the strong safety position–he’s a hitter, but he bites on way too many play action passes (you saw it Saturday if you were looking for it), and he tackles better than Earl.

Thankfully, it seems most of the early reactions suggest that Brown will slide over to strong safety. So, who takes the free safety role?

The early leader in the race is Von Hutchins. A converted corner, Hutchins had that nice pick off of Brian Greise Saturday night. I suppose, given the options we have on the table right now, he would be my choice. The downside is that he’s a little small (5′9″) and doesn’t have much of a track record, so he’s an unknown quantity at best.

Another possibility is Brandon Harrison, the rookie out of Stanford. Technically, he is a strong safety, which kind of puts us in the position we were with Earl/Brown out there. He’s a big kid, though (6′2″/227), and if he can show a nose for the ball, he’d be an intriguing prospect. My concern with him, as I’ve said before, is that I really don’t see him being a DB for long. He strikes me as a Cato June type–as in he’s going to fill out a little more and be more of a nickel LB when it’s all said and done–and he has a reputation for being afraid of making the big hit.

For a third choice, Scott broke the news that the team was bringing in Shaun Williams for a workout. Unfortunately, as Scott points out, Williams is better against the run than the pass and has been described as “reckless.” Sure, that would be better than, say, bringing in Matt Stevens–of course, I would be better than Matt Stevens–but it’s not necessarily a panacea.

Other possibilities include Dexter McCleon and Brandon Mitchell² [edit: and Jason Simmons.] So, yeah, I guess you could say the position is still up for grabs.

One interesting (if slightly tongue-in-cheek) suggestion floating around the message board was moving Bradlee Van Pelt from QB to FS. He’s big enough (6′2″/220), his father was a linebacker, he has some anger management issues (remember him spiking the ball off the face of a Colorado defender?) that suggest he might have the right temperament for defense, and–best of all–he intercepted his own pass the other night. In fact, he originally enrolled at Michigan State, where they converted him to defensive back. Skills, baby! Clearly, this one isn’t going to happen, but I don’t think it’s a horrible suggestion. The kid is not an NFL QB… why not give him a chance to play somewhere else? It’d be like Rick Ankiel, only without Bradlee ever having shown promise at his original position.

My guess, when all is said and done, is that Hutchins wins the job. And if he plays like has so far in camp and preseason, I am fine with that. I just can’t help wondering if we are not overlooking some better possibilities.

¹ See, e.g., the lick he put on Jeremy Shockey last year. (That’s a great picture.)
² I am still high on the Brandon Mitchell bandwagon, despite my hatred for OSU. I have a sneaking feeling he could be the answer, but I also doubt he will be given a real shot to prove it. So is life, I guess.

Author’s note: Sorry for the somewhat disjointed nature of this post. I wrote it in four or five separate sittings because jerks kept expecting me to actually work. At work. Jerks.

My long Nigerian nightmare is over

Jul 27, 2007 2007 Draft, Amobi Okoye is 20, Gary Kubiak, Training camp 2007, Tremendous Busts

In addition to being 20 years old, Amobi Okoye is now a Houston Texan. (Hat tip to Mark, who continues to make my job easy.) Late last night, Okoye signed a 6-year (voidable to five) deal with $12.785MM in guaranteed money (out of a total $17.6MM).

With that move, everyone who is supposed to be at camp will be at camp, where Kubiak can begin the process of crushing dreams and releasing underperforming players. (Travis Johnson, I am looking at you.)

Like sands through the hour glass, so go the days of McCardell

Jul 25, 2007 2007 Draft, Batman, Colts Shmolts, Free Agency, Super Mario, Training camp 2007

You know the off-season has gotten long when the “he is… no, he’s not” regarding Keenan McCardell as a Texan becomes daily discussion.

That said, reader Mark¹ points me to this line in the NFL.com transaction log.

Green Bay Packers	Korey Hall signed/draft choice
Houston Texans	Keenan McCardell signed
Indianapolis Colts	Tarik Glenn retired
New Orleans Saints	Robert Meachem signed/draft choice, Five-year contract

So… um… I am going to say that McCardell is a Texan. Though that is subject to change at any point until I see him in uniform.

By the way, how cool is it (from our perspective) to see Tarik Glenn officially retire? (See Stampede Blue for a full discussion of Glenn’s departure.)

Say what you want about how quickly Manning gets rid of the ball or how well he feels pressure or how good the offensive system is at replacing people, but Texans fans (more than just about anyone, I guess) know the true value of a real left tackle. Maybe Tony Ugoh or Charlie Johnson steps up and plays well… but neither of them is Tarik Glenn. And, for that, Mario Williams is exceedingly happy.

¹ And can I just mention how much I love readers who alert me to stories? They instantly become my favorite people in the whole universe for a solid 15 or 20 minutes.

Camp Kubiak

Jul 23, 2007 2007 Draft, Inanity, National Media, Preview, Training camp 2007

Maybe it’s because I am writing this blog and searching (mostly in vain) every day for something worth writing about, but this offseason has seemed oppressively long. I’ve seen glaciers move more quickly.

Slow or not, however, the end is nigh!

Rookies have already reported for “indoctrination”–which sounds ominous, but likely isn’t–and actual camp begins in earnest on Friday. Saturday and Sunday each feature two practice sessions open to the public, of which I will be attending 75%. I spare no expense when it comes to you, the loyal reader.¹

If last year’s camp is any indication, camp will be hot,² well organized, and pretty up-tempo right from the opening bell. We’ve gone over the positional battles repeatedly here, so I won’t rehash them, but I am hoping to get a little insight into “Who’s Now” at some of the key positions. (I would also like to understand exactly what “Who’s Now” means, but that’s a different story.)

*****

In other “camp is almost here” news, the teams has still not reached an agreement with Manchild or JJ (or Brandon Frye). This is not bad news as of right now, but it merits watching as this week progresses. The Raiders have stated that J-Rock is close to signing, which would make it easier to slot everyone in after him, so I’m still guessing that Amobi is signed by midweek.

Also, I was flipping through the Preview issue of Pro Football Weekly, when something curious caught my eye. They predict the Titans to go 6-10, despite giving their QB, RBs, and WRs grades of B, D, and D+ respectively. By my math, that’s a GPA of 1.74. The Texans, whom the magazine says will go 5-11, have grades of C+, B-, and C+ at those positions. 2.66 GPA. Interesting. Even if we include the offensive lines (B- and C-) in those grades, the discrepancy only closes to 1.91 for the Titans and 2.24 for the Texans. What about the defense? 2.22 for the Titans (C, B-, C) and 2.66 for the Texans (C+, B-, C+). Pardon me… but how the hell does this many any sense?

¹ This is a total lie. I just wanted to go to camp. Still, you kinda benefit from it.
² Unless, of course, The Weather Jesus decides that he wants to keep raining on Houston, in which case the public viewing will be canceled and I will have to hurt someone.

Kasey Studdard is not Amobi Okoye

Jul 21, 2007 2007 Draft, Amobi Okoye is 20, Jacoby Jones is unheralded, Training camp 2007

The Texans have reached an agreement Kasey Studdard. And, like nearly every other article you read about him, the linked entry says he “plays with a mean streak.” What the hell does that even mean? Does he pinch opposing linemen? Take his opponent’s mother out to a nice dinner and never call her again? Maybe one of the Longhorn fans can fill me in.

So, with Studdard in the fold, we have lowered the number of non-signees to four. Unfortunately (at the moment), that foursome includes the two guys who are going to get a whole lot of playing time. No disrespect to Brandon Harrison or Brandon Frye, who both stand a good chance at being number 2 on the depth chart at their positions, but I will rest a little easier once Manchild and JJ are signed.

Update: As Tim points out, Harrison signed about 5 hours after this post went up. I have magical powers.

With the first pick in the 2029 NFL Draft…

Jul 20, 2007 2007 Draft, Chocodiles, Non-Texan stuff, Self-Referential Stuff, The Fred, Training camp 2007

Some random Friday Texans nuggets while I let it sink in that my wife is pregnant.

• The Texans have inked draft picks Zac Diles and Fred Bennett. With rookies scheduled to report to camp on Sunday, expect a flurry of deals in the next 48 hours.
• Texas.com has a breakdown of the three TEs. Nothing overly newsworthy in there, except that it appears all three are healthy and ready to contribute to the team in slightly different ways.
• Single game tickets are now on sale. The Titans game and the Saints game reportedly sold out in minutes. I have no idea why…
• Not so much “breaking news” as just really cool and helpful, USA Today has a searchable NFL salary database.
• Finally, I just wanted to mention that I will be in Houston around 6PM next Friday. Somewhere in between the three practices (note: if any of those three are canceled, someone dies), I’d like to meet up with readers/fellow bloggers/non-serial killers and have a beer or thirty. An Astros game is also doable if anyone is interested.

Anthony Maddox got me a sweet deal on this sofa

Jul 10, 2007 2007 Draft, Amobi Okoye is 20, Athletes who don't stab people, David Carr has Post-Concussion Syndrome, DeMeco Ryans, Demarcus Faggins sucks, Gary Kubiak, Posts that list too many players, Preview, Super Mario

Filed under “Betcha ESPN never mentioned this,” over the last eleven games of last season, the Houston Texans had a top-10 defense.

Now, before the negative types in the audience say anything, yes, I know the whole “if you remove all the bad, of course they were good” rebuttal. But, however true that argument is in other situations, it misses the huge underlying point here.

Last season, Kubiak took a 3-4 defense and transmogrified it into a 4-3. Considering the struggles of the 3-4 in 2005, especially against the run, one would have expected some struggles with the change in scheme. And struggle they did for the first six games.

Week 1. McNabb throws for 314 and 3 TDs, the Eagles rush for 130, and Houston loses 24-10.
Week 2. Mrs. Chesney throws for 400 and 3 TDs, the Colts rush for 125, and Houston loses 43-24.
Week 3. Brunell throws for 261 and 1 TD (and sets the consecutive completion record), the Redskins rush for 234, and Houston loses 31-15.
Week 4. Culpepper throws for 249 and 1 TD, the Dolphins rush for 70, and Houston squeaks out a 17-15 win.
Week 6. The Cowboys threw for 203 and 3 TDs, rushed for 170, and beat Houston 34-6.

Now, the conventional explanation for why this D struggled out of the gate was because it was attempting to fit square 3-4 pegs into round 4-3 holes. This sounds good, but isn’t completely true. Jason Babin, Travis Johnson, and Seth Payne were the only DL remnants (with Babin technically a LB in ‘05) from the 2005 season on the 2006 roster.

A more accurate reason is that the defense was almost completely new, not only in terms of scheme, but also in terms of personnel. Two-thirds of the starting DL from 2005 (Robaire Smith and Gary Walker) were missing from the ‘06 team. Meaning you had Travis Johnson and rookie Mario Williams thrust into a starting roles, Anthony Weaver starting at DE without the support of the Ravens’ D all around him, and a revolving door at the other DT position that started with Seth Payne and ended with someone who was delivering furniture a few weeks before he suited up.

Right behind those guys, you had a rookie MLB replacing both Antwan Peek and DaShon Polk, and a SLB (Orr) with only one full season and 59 career tackles. In fact, one could argue that the WLB Greenwood was the only member of the front seven who was a proven performer in the 4-3 (having played it in Miami).

Looking at all of that, not struggling would have been surprising. Yet, something happened on the way to the cellar–this group of guys gelled, the system clicked, and the defense became good. Their 300.1 YPG in the last ten games would have ranked 8th over the course of the whole season. Compared to other teams over the same span, that average also ranked the Texans in the top 10 in the NFL.

That a team so comprised would struggle out of the gate with such a switch is almost expected. That the same team would pick up the new system so well in five games so as to be one of the league’s best defenses over the last 10 games of the season is wholly unexpected. That a team would rise to that level despite having an injured RDE, uninspiring play from DT, and a ‘tweener at LDE is unheard of.

Along with David Carr packing his sandy vagina and moving to BBQ Hell,¹ the development of the defense over the course of last season is one of the most exciting things about this upcoming year. After all, the team went out and improved the defensive line by bringing in Manchild and relegating Travis Johnson to the bench.² DeMeco is another year older. Mario is healthy and has been working on his technique. Anthony Maddox is not beginning the season as a Rent-A-Center associate. Shawn Barber and Danny Clark were brought in to provide depth at linebacker (and possibly challenge for a starting spot). And on, and on, and on it goes. With the way this unit finished last season, if the pass coverage can just be passably decent (or if, by some sort of divine intervention, Petey Faggins becomes WAY better during camp), this side of the ball could be one of the best in football.

[Author's note: Tip of the cap to Stephanie whose post here gave me the idea for this one.]

¹ Also known as “North Carolina.”
² I fail to even pretend that Okoye will not be better than Bust Johnson.

Readin’, Writin’, and Reacting to Zone Blitzes

Jul 9, 2007 2007 Draft, 2008 Draft, Preview, Secondary issues are primary

In case you haven’t listened to any sports radio, watched any ESPN news, or surfed any NFL web coverage in the past 24 hours, I feel it is my duty to remind you that the supplemental draft is Thursday.

I don’t expect the Texans to take anyone in said draft. We are already lacking a second round pick next April, so we can’t very well go offering a third or fourth in a supplemental draft where players often don’t pan out. (Side note: Remember, also, that–in addition to losing the corresponding draft pick in next April’s draft–teams face the headache of affording players taken in the S-draft within their existing rookie pool monies. Non-drafted free-agent signees do not have to fit in that pool.)

For teams who are looking to draft on Thursday, there are three names popping up–Jared Gaither, OT, Maryland; Paul Oliver, DB, Georgia; and Chris Patrick, OT, Nebraska.

Of those, Gaither has dominated the talk today and for good reason. At 6′8.5″ and 324 lbs., with a sub 5.0 40 time, Gaither has measureables better than those of Joe Thomas. (Gaither only managed 15 reps on the bench, but that was due–in part–to a slight shoulder injury.)

Still, the very fact that he is in the supplemental draft (due to being academically ineligible) is enough to raise serious flags among most teams. That will prevent any teams from spending a first or, likely, a second round pick on him. At best, Gaither can hope to go in the third, possibly to one of the teams with multiple picks in that round. (The lesson: Stay in school, kids.)

All that said, I would totally spend a 7th on Oliver, though I suspect he goes higher than that. He is big (if not exceptionally fast) and he shut down Calvin Johnson in their head-to-head matchup.

Bucky Brooks talks out of his ass

Jul 5, 2007 2007 Draft, Amobi Okoye is 20, Big dudes doing the little things, Gary Kubiak might be high, Jason Babin, National Media, Preview, Super Mario, The Schaub Experiment

Other than Peter King, I rarely find a reason to read anything at SI.com. Andrew Perloff is insufferable, Dr. Z might actually be retarded¹, and Michael Silver has never written anything that kept my attention beyond the first paragraph.

Occasionally, however, Bucky Brooks writes something that I not only read, but that I feel the need to comment on. Obviously, if I am writing this, today was one of those days. In his AFC South preview, Brooks lists the key challenges for each team in the conference. Thankfully, not one of his challenges is about the offensive line, as B^2 posits the following:

Challenge No. 1: Make Matt Schaub comfortable in a new offense.

Challenge No. 2: Find another threat in the passing game.

Challenge No. 3: Get better play out of the defensive line.

Now, 1 and 2, I can’t argue with. We’ve talked about both of those ad naseum for the last two months. Schaubby definitely needs to be “comfortable” in the offense, assuming that “comfortable” means “good,” and the WR2 slot needs to be filled by someone who doesn’t play like he is missing one leg and three chromosomes. No surprise.

As for 3, well, I suppose I agree with the sentiment. After all, with the number of first round picks we run out there in the front four, you’d expect for that to be the best third of our defense. The part that stuck out to me, however, was this:

But now with Mario Williams, Travis Johnson and ‘07 draftee Amobi Okoye slated to start, the onus is on this crew to produce some pressure on opposing signal-callers. [...] Johnson’s ineffectiveness as a rusher allowed teams to double Williams without fear. If Johnson can recover from his season-ending calf injury and provide a push inside, Williams should begin to see less of the double teams that he faced last season.

Um… huh? First of all, am I the only person who hadn’t heard that TJ was going to start? I’ve lived the last six or seven months assuming that Anthony Maddox was going to be the starting two-gapper, since, you know, he was MUCH better than TJ last year, in pretty much every way (tackles, sacks, ff, fr, etc.). Besides, Kubiak has pretty much been singing Maddox’s praises since minicamp. So, why, dear Bucky, is Johnson “slated to start?”

In the end–unless I completely missed the memo–this is probably some writer just looking at the current depth chart at NFL.com and basing opinions thereon. Whatever. The bigger question is here is “what if Bucky is right?”

The single most important thing for Manchild is that he isn’t continually double-teamed (like Mario was last year). Teams are going to focus on him early, if for no other reason than the hype that accompanied his selection. Part of the reason that Weaver has already been penciled in at LDE is because he’s a better rusher (supposedly) than Jason Babin. Maddox showed last year that, of the two real options, he is the better two-gapper. You combine Weaver on the outside with Maddox on Manchild’s right (along with a healthy Mario), and Amobi should see nothing more than a single guard (with the occasional clip from the center) all season. This is important–Okoye is at his best when he gets penetration straight up field and can read-and-react to the QB and RB. He is faster in the pass rush than any of our other defensive linemen. If he is forced to fight through double-teams all season, not only will he be hampered, but the entire line will be worse by orders of magnitude. I can’t say this strongly enough–Johnson getting single blockers while Amobi gets doubles make the entire defense worse; Maddox taking on two, even if he never makes a single tackle, frees Okoye and makes the entire defense better. I’m no coach, but I am pretty sure that a better defense is better than a worse defense.

So Bucky, don’t take this the wrong way, but I hope you are just as full of shit as the rest of the national media. Thankfully, if your colleagues are any indication, you are.

UPDATE: The Texans’ own website ran an article yesterday about how Anthony Maddox is the starter and anyone who wants to play that position is going to have to beat him. That’s pretty much what we’ve been hearing and planning for since December, and it looks like Kubes is using some common sense.

It’s not overly surprising that a columnist would just glance at the Texans depth chart on NFL.com and use that to form his “opinion.” I’m sure that sort of thing happens all the time. What is surprising, though, is that he would devote paragraphs to supporting something that was wrong to begin with, while simultaneously failing to mention the secondary as a “challenge” this season. Poor showing, Buckwheat. I now lump you in with the rest of the ‘tards.

¹ Seriously, I cannot stand that guy. How many self-referential mailbags where he talks about wine and his wife being redheaded do we have to endure before he is euthanized?

Zach Diles wishes he played a different position

Jul 1, 2007 2007 Draft, Chocodiles, Demarcus Faggins sucks, Preview, Secondary issues are primary, Shawn Barber and Danny Clark, The Fred

With 25 days until the opening of Training Camp, it’s time to get up to speed on position battles and the players involved. Up first, the defense.

Position: SLB
Incumbent: Shantee Orr
Players involved: Orr, Charlie Anderson
Analysis: I already did some of this position here. Long story short, the better candidate for this job depends greatly on the role Kubiak sees for the SLB. If he wants to blitz from that side, in order to free Weaver/Okoye (and draw attention from Mario), Orr is the answer–he played that style in the old 3-4. If, however, Kubes sees more of an all-around LB role, with TE pass coverage and whatnot, Anderson might be the way to go (better height and slightly faster).
Prediction: Orr named “starter,” but Anderson will get plenty of second/third down reps.

Position: WLB
Incumbent: Morlon Greenwood
Players involved: Greenwood, Shawn Barber, Danny Clark
Analysis: All three of those guys have at least seven years of NFL experience, so we aren’t exactly talking about a long-term solution here. Even more strange, you have three dudes here who are incredibly similar. All are roughly the same height and weight and all have posted multiple 100-tackle seasons. The biggest differences lie with Barber, as he is far better in pass coverage than the other two, but also has a lot of trouble staying healthy. Given the choice, I would probably go with Clark because he is a little younger than Barber and a little better than Greenwood, but I don’t know that any decision here will make or break much of anything.
Prediction: Greenwood keeps his job, at least to open the season. (Note: If one of these three gets cut, my guess is it will be Barber, as Clark can also play MLB if needed.)

Position: CB2
Incumbent: Demarcus Faggins
Players involved: Faggins, Fred Bennett, Jamar Fletcher, Dexter Wynn
Analysis: So, the official word is that this position is Petey’s to lose–something he is completely capable of doing. Bennett, the rookie out of South Carolina, looked good in OTAs. He picked up the defense quickly and seemed to be taking in everything the coaches taught. The knock was that he still needed to improve his ball skills, but you could say the same thing about Faggins and Wynn. Neither Wynn nor new addition Fletcher have never really shown anything that would suggest they could be a starting NFL CB, so this competition is really just about Faggins and Bennett.
Prediction: Faggins continues to butcher the CB2 position.

Positon: FS
Incumbent: C.C. Brown
Players involved: Brown, Dexter McCleon, Von Hutchins
Analysis: Newsflash–Granted, I spend most of my words on the secondary complaining about Petey, but Brown was no great shakes last season. Because of this, the Texans did not receive much in the way of big plays from their safeties last year. As a possible remedy, veterans McCleon and Hutchins have been taking reps at free safety through the offseason. Now, if the goal for the free safety in this defense (and the reason for moving two CBs to FS) is to create turnovers via the interception, then my vote goes to McCleon. (As an aside, I have no idea why Hutchins would give anyone the impression that he can play a ball-hawking centerfield type of safety.)
Prediction: McCleon.

Position: SS
Incumbent: Glenn Earl
Players involved: Earl, Brown, Brandon Harrison
Analysis: If Brown is supplanted at FS, he will likely get the chance to compete at his natural position of SS. Rookie Brandon Harrison will also be in the mix there as well. The odd thing about Harrison is his size–he’s 6′1″/227 and will likely fill out at this level, meaning he might be better served playing nickel LB. (There are also rumors that he is afraid of making big hits, which isn’t exactly what I want out of my SS.) As for Earl and Brown, flip a coin.
Prediction: Earl keeps his starting gig.

Position: Nickel CB
Incumbent: McCleon
Players involved: Bennett, Fletcher, Hutchins
Analysis: Such is the state of our secondary that a guy who was not even the primary nickel CB at the beginning of last season is in a position to be our starting free safety this year. Also, in a nice twist of irony, our starting CB2 is not good at the position he gets to play, but might be our best nickel CB. Crud. The team brought in Fletcher to play this kind of role, and I am sure he will get some opportunities, but I think a strong showing by Bennett in his competition with Faggins might land him this gig as a consolation prize.
Prediction: Bennett

Patron Tequila is a no-good, lying bastard

Jun 29, 2007 2007 Draft, Demarcus Faggins sucks, Dunta Robinson, Like whoa, Rebuttals, Secondary issues are primary

It’s Friday and I’m hungover. Hungover like whoa. Even the thought of writing something long and (semi-) coherent makes my head hurt a little more. So you are getting some randomness right now, with a possibility of real posting should this coffee and McDonald’s turn out to be a panacea.

• Big Blue Shoe surrenders.¹ He also writes a pretty fair post about our revamped defense, though he seems to have misunderstood the gist of my Dunta Robinson breakdown. (Note: It’s not that I don’t think he’s as good as advertised; it’s that the numbers actually SHOW that he’s not as good as advertised.) Oh, well… baby steps.
• The NFL Supplemental Draft is next month. For those teams looking to pick up guys who were kicked off of teams, academically ineligible, and/or otherwise not going to play anymore NCAA pigskin, the Supplemental Draft is a godsend. Yahoo! Sports has a breakdown of some of the higher profile low profile players. The author of that piece seems to think we’ll be in the mix for Nebraska OL Chris Patrick. To which I say “blah.” I am somewhat interested, however, in UConn SS/OLB Donta Moore. Dude is tough, fast, and can tackle like a mofo (that’s a technical term). Which is a description that you generally don’t give to C.C. Brown.
• Thomas Hilton has a nice recap of pre-camp player news from around the web. There’s even some fantasy football talk. At some later point, I want to do a fantasy football breakdown of this team that goes further than the “Andre Johnson is good” chatter we usually get. I’ll give you a sneak peak, though, right now. If you are in a 50-team league that uses individual defensive players, you should try to snag Petey Faggins somewhere around pick 985.
  
• Finally, Pro Football Talk reports, in a very smug and condescending manner, that the Texans’ string of sell-outs might be coming to an end. Please note, though, that you have to scroll down past where he drops the soap for Sprint-Nextel.

• Though the Houston Texans like to boast about the fact that they’ve had 50 straight sellouts in five years of existence, there’s a chance that the number might not get much higher. Or any higher.

  Thanks to a head’s-up from a reader, it appears that the Texans are having trouble selling their season tickets. Currently, “less than 2,000” are available, which means that as many as 1,999 are left — despite the prior existence of a “priority wait list.”

  So the inference that can be drawn is that, after a chunk of last year’s season-ticket holders passed on renewing and after the folks on the waiting list got their chance to buy tickets, there are still about $1 million worth of unsold season seats.

  But should any of this be surprising to anyone? After three years of improvement, the Texans tanked in 2005, and then committed the football equivalent of passing on Michael Jordan and Magic Johnson by leaving Reggie Bush and Vince Young on the draft board in April 2006. [Author's Note: You can almost smell the exaggeration, it's so thick.] If either of those guys were playing in Houston, we suspect that every 2007 game would be already sold out.

  As it stands, it could be that the only 2007 games that will be fully sold out will be those in which Bush and Young will make their visits to town.

  Jerk.

¹ I can’t decide if I am amused or annoyed that he tried to sound magnanimous about the whole ordeal with the “he kicked my post’s metaphorical ass, but at least I didn’t call him names” bit. (I’m paraphrasing.) Like I said to him in the comments, I called his mom names. And that’s only if you find the scent of rotting French cheese to be offensive.

Ed McCaffrey anxiously awaits Jeff Fisher’s call

May 21, 2007 2007 Draft,