Vonta Leach KTFO Award - Week 11
Nov 23, 2008 Awards, Awesomeness, Vonta Leach KTFO Award
I know this is late going up, but I have an excuse. Specifically, I (and others) looked all week for a clip of this hit, but could find nothing. So the question became do we award the prize to someone else simply because a clip was available or do we say fuck it and award it to the rightful winner?
We are all about rightful in these parts.
So, here’s the situation. Fourth Quarter, Texans at Colts. The Texans have just scored a TD to make the game 27-30. On the ensuing kickoff, Chad Simpson bobbles the ball a bit, then takes off toward his right sideline. He arrives at the sideline right around the 20-yard line…where Vonta Leach proceeds to knock the ever-living fuck out of him. (This is where I would enter explosive sound effects and shit if I had such ability.)
The best part of the hit, however, was Leach’s reaction afterward. He didn’t get up and dance around. Rather, he glared at the Colts and seemed to subtley flex on Chad Simpson, who remained on the ground for a moment. That’s how you do it, kids. Act like you’ve been there before. Act like you deliver those hits so often that some idiot blogger has named a weekly award after you.
Chad Simpson…
YOU JUST GOT KNOCKED THE FUCK OUT!!!
Top 5 Worst Defensive Texans
Jun 23, 2008 Awards, Awfulness, Frank Okam is an evil genius, Top 5, Travis Johnson is a piece of shit, Tremendous Busts
Back to the lists, bitches. You call it filler, I call it…well…filler. But that’s beside the point. This post was originally going to be Top 5 Worst Texans, regardless of position. After a short conversation with Tim, however, I quickly realized that there are, sadly, too many deserving players to narrow the list to five. The defensive guys come first here because we are all about defense in these parts. We’ll cover the offense tomorrow.
Note: The only requirement to be on this list was a minimum of 10 games started in a Texans uni. Thus, Boselli, Joppru, etc., are not eligible.
5. Cory Sears, DE. The fact that Sears started 12 games at LDE for the team in 2003 (also known as 3 B.M. (Before Mario)) should tell you all you need to know about the early Texans’ defensive line. He racked up an “impressive” 1 sack and 26 solo tackles. He also had one sack the previous season (4 B.M.) as a non-starter. And they say we didn’t have a pass rush???
4. Travis Johnson, DT. One career sack. One career INT. 58 solo tackles in three years. Roughly 30 personal fouls for blatant stupidity. About the only thing he’s got going for him is that the coaching staff is convinced that he will still live up to his draft status. Well, until he is officially supplanted by evil genius Frank Okam.
3. Phillip Buchanon, CB. Showtime’s failures have been chronicled here over the last week in these Top 5 lists, so there’s not much to add. Well, other than the fact that he tackled worse than any player we’ve ever had.
2. Matt Stevens, FS. Tim once relayed to me that he tried to name BRB “Shaking Matt Stevens,” but it was vetoed as being too obscure. It wouldn’t have been the least bit obscure to Texans fans, however, who still remember Matt Stevens as the poster child for blown coverage, failed tackles, and general shittiness. He apparently was paralyzed in a motorcycle accident, but, contrary to popular belief, this occurred after he left the Texans organization. (I’m going to Hell.)
1. DeMarcus “Petey” Faggins, CB. Wow…where to start? It’s not like Faggins suckiness in 2007 was a sudden change of course — he’d sucked badly enough in previous seasons that I spent most of last preseason screaming (in written form) that he should not be starting. Then came the Atlanta game. Ugh. I know the whole story of “he’s a pretty decent nickel corner” and, while that might have been true at one point, moving him back to nickel last year didn’t really help his play. Still, I wonder how true the idea that he was a good third corner is. He was playing with some pretty subpar secondaries throughout his days as NCB, so it’s just as likely that the QBs were picking on other players a lot of the time. Either way, Petey sucked at some level then, sucks horrifically now, and wins the honor of the Suckiest Suck to ever Suck. I gotta go, my damn weiner kids are listening.
Also receiving votes: Jerry DeLoach, Lewis Sanders, Marlon McCree.
**All stats courtesy of Pro Football Reference.
Super
Jan 7, 2008 2006 Draft, Awards, Awesomeness, Pro Bowl 2008, Reggie Bush, Super Mario, Vinsanity
So, I’ve been a little lax in my posting of Texans news. Apologies and whatnot.
Lest I be seen as a total slacker, however, allow me to point out that not only was Mario Williams named Defensive Lineman of the Year (up yours, Haynesworth), he also received a vote for Defensive Player of the Year and will likely receive the same number of Offensive Player of the Year votes as Reggie Bush and Vince Young combined.
