God hates Arkansas; loves Texans fans
Apr 4, 2008 2008 Season, Babies rule, Damn it, Fuck the Cowboys, Self-Referential Stuff, Shit, Trent Green's mushed up brains
Well, I have to admit, I TOTALLY didn’t see that coming. The tornado, I mean. One minute, I am nearly asleep in bed (naked, of course) and, the next, I am hiding in the bathroom with the family as a tornado roars overhead. Once it passed, I went outside and surveyed the damage–lots of trees down, a ruptured gas main that was spewing natural gas, and lots of general carnage. We walked to a friend’s house a couple blocks away and got a ride to the mother-in-law’s house (I honestly would rather have slept in the yard, breathing natural gas).
ANYWAY…we went back this morning to really take stock of what happened. Long story short, God smote the neighbors while sparing me and mine. The only conclusion I can draw is that he happens to read this blog and didn’t want me to die, though, honestly, I think we can all agree that BFD brings way more to the party these days than I do. I took some pictures of the destruction, too, so we can all be entertained. Oh, and to answer your question, the new smoker and the big TV are totally fine.
Here is the neighbor’s kitchen. According to him, the whole house shifted on the foundation, too. He is a Cowboys fan, though, so he probably deserved this.
Here is the adjacent neighbor’s work trailer. “Suck it,” says God.
This rental car did not come standard with a roof tree. That was an aftermarket add-on. I think it brings out the paint job nicely.
Arkansas Bonsai Tree.
This is our one little spot of damage. Had it fallen differently, it would have smashed into my bedroom and mangled shit. Instead, it’s a flesh wound, giving the house some street cred. Yes, Jesus loves meeee…
These used to be upright. And that piece of the sidewalk was flat. I think I liked both better that way. Then again, I have never had much of an eye for decorating.
My car is doing its impression of Trent Green’s brain.
2200 lbs. of tornado-proof steel. God bless Texas(-made products).
You see disaster; I see a clear chunk of southern sky that will let me get DirecTV before football season starts. Life gives you lemons, you throw those suckers at someone and laugh.
Perhaps the funniest part of this whole thing was, as the tornado was passing overhead, the baby slept right through it. In the end, nothing I like got damaged, I have a cool story, and my football watching is improved. I think I kinda like tornadoes.
Wrapped around your pretty little finger again
Feb 28, 2008 Babies rule, Daddy's girl, Self-Referential Stuff
As a general rule, I probably put WAY more personal information into posts on here than (a) most bloggers do on their own blogs and (b) is probably a good idea. That said, I ain’t stoppin’ now.
Sophia Elizabeth Campbell was born February 26, 2008, at 12:53 A.M, and weighed in at 5 lb. 10 oz. Despite the fact that the baby was 4 weeks and 4 days early, she scored a 9 on the one-minute APGAR and a 10 on the 5-minute. She is also, according to the doctor, one of only two or three 35 week babies he’s ever discharged after only one night. Plus, she looks nearly exactly like I did as a newborn. So, yeah, you could say I am proud.
Some random thoughts and observations based on my first 72 hours of being the father of a girl.
- Because she had to spend her first night in the nursery and because mom was hooked up to the happy juice through lunch the next day, I spent a lot of quality time talking to her during her first twenty-four hours. During that time, we discussed things she should like (the Texans, Michigan football, BBQ) and things she should hate (the Cowboys, Ohio State, midgets). We also worked on our first phrase (”fuck the Cowboys”) and decided that 25 is an appropriate age to consider dating.
- Girl plumbing is, to say the least, different. I knew this going in, of course, but I hadn’t really considered until my first diaper changing experience. I am pleased to report we had no problems.
- You know your baby is small when you look at the “newborn” sized clothes and think, whoa, that is WAY too big for her.
- I am reasonably sure she is the smartest human being on the planet.
- It wasn’t until after she was named that I realized her initials were “SEC.” This troubles me. I fear, as I told Tim, that I am slowly being assimilated. Damn.
