Wow. Just…wow.
Jun 26, 2008 Awesomeness, Mike Vick, Rendhel and Sid, Teams that aren't the Texans
I like Kris Brown as much as a guy can like a kicker, I suppose. I mean, I have no ill will toward him or anything, so he’s got that going for him. Which is nice.
That said, if this was real, I would gladly kill him if Shaun Suisham suddenly wanted to placekick in the Bayou City.
Jesus balls, that is amazing. Though…really…doesn’t it kind of remind you of those Mike Vick / LeBron James PowerAde commercials?
Two Words
Jul 17, 2007 Federal Pound Me In The Ass Prison, Mike Vick, Preview, Teams that aren't the Texans, You're the Man Now Dog
*insert maniacal laugh here*
Jason Campbell is not related to me
Jun 20, 2007 Amobi Okoye is 20, Andre Johnson, Athletes who don't stab people, DeMeco Ryans, Mike Vick, Preview, Super Mario, Teams that aren't the Texans, The Schaub Experiment
A post in which I randomly throw random bits of randomness at you.
A friend pointed out that, in my post about us beating the Falcons, I off-handedly mentioned how they were relying on two rookies (Anderson, Houston) without mentioning that we are relying on one rookie and two second-year players. While he is technically correct, I offer the following in rebuttal:
- I never claimed to be anywhere close to rational. Or sane. I merely said that I could come up with nine games in which we had a better-than-average chance of winning. If, in breaking down these games, some of my arguments seem specious, it is probably because they are.
- I still think that it is more likely than not that Ron Mexico will not be under center for that week 4 game. The only thing less scary1 than Joe Harrington as a backup QB is Joe Harrington as a fill-in starter.
- There’s a difference between relying on a rookie CB with marginal cover skills and a rookie DT. If one of them loses his battle, it is an immediate TD. For the other, failure is less obvious and less damaging on the scoreboard in any given single instance.
- At the same time, there is a similarity between the two–both will likely be targeted by the opposing team’s offense. In Manchild’s case, teams will not want to let the hyped rookie beat them and inflict his brand of Nigerian pain upon their respective QBs. Of course, by focusing on him, you take focus away from Super Mario or someone else on the d-line. This is a good thing (for us). On the other hand, targeting Chris Houston will have more to do with the fact that you think you can beat him. Having seen him play nearly every game last year, a fair assessment would be that he is freakishly athletic, has a nose for the big play, but does not cover well one-on-one. This is also a good thing (for us).
- DeMeco is great. I realize that this is hardly dispositive, but it warrants mentioning.
Moving on…
Someone over at Chron.com read my previous post (about national media coverage) and said something about how my use of footnotes was a poor rip-off of David Foster Wallace. Now, without appearing too thin-skinned, I should mention that I have no idea if he is correct or not, as I have never read anything by Wallace. (I mean “correct” in the sense that Wallace uses footnotes. Hell, I am sure he’s correct that what I am doing is not of the same literary quality as DFW’s work.) If anything, my use of footnotes is a holdover from law school and more closely resembles a Chuck Klosterman ripoff. Without the emo glasses.
‘Member how Keenan McCardell came and worked out for the team? Well, his decision is apparently down to us and the Washington Redskins. Leaving aside his age, that he is from Houston, and that no one in his right mind would want to be a Redskin, I still don’t see why KMc would choose D.C. over Houston. Here, he likely steps right into a starting role across from Andre Johnson. There, he competes with four veteran receivers (Moss, Randle El, Thrash, and Lloyd). Here, he steps into a receiver-friendly offense with an unproven QB. There, he steps into Joe Gibbs’ offense with an unproven QB. Etc. I predict he’ll sign here unless Dan Snyder is just trying to collect WRs and is willing to grossly overpay to get him. Which is always possible.
Finally, an interesting post about professional sports teams with all-time records under .500. Yes, we are on there. But, we’re only two undefeated regular seasons away from breaking even.
1 I use “less” from the opposing team’s perspective; if you are a Falcons fan, feel free to read that as “more.”
Chairman Kaga unveils today’s ingredient…Talent!
May 21, 2007 David Carr has Post-Concussion Syndrome, Mike Vick, Offensive (punch)Line, Randall Cunningham was a Tecmo god, Teams that aren't the Texans, Vinsanity
Call it variations on a theme.
It’s time for everyone’s FAVORITE gameshow–XTREME QB COMPARISON DEATHMATCH BOWL! [Insert lots of explosions and a voice yelling "EXTREME!" in an Asian accent.]
Let’s meet today’s contestants.
Quarterback #1’s 2006 statistics:
Rating: 66.7
Comp-Att: 184-357
Yards: 2199
TDs: 12
INTs: 13
Rushing Yards: 552
Rushing TDs: 7
Fumbles: 11 (3 lost)
Sacks: 25
Wins: 8
Quarterback #2’s 2006 statistics:
Rating: 75.7
Comp-Att: 204-388
Yards: 2474
TDs: 20
INTs: 13
Rushing Yards: 1039
Rushing TDs: 2
Fumbles: 9 (3 lost)
Sacks: 45
Wins: 7
Now, which QB would you rather have? Looking at the numbers, it appears that QB2 was superior in nearly every category, despite playing behind what was apparently an awful line. (For comparison, everyone’s posterboy for bad lineplay, David Carr was sacked only 41 times last year.) Yet, fans of QB2’s team have derided their signal caller as “a glorified running back” and a “below average QB.” Fans of QB1, on the other hand, are patently convinced that he is Jesus in a helmet.*
What gives?
Obviously, the two QBs in question are Vince Young and Mike Vick. But, putting aside any preconceived notions of “shoulda been drafted first” and “two dogs enter, one dog leaves,”** if you merely had the numbers above and I told you that QB1s supporting cast (at least on paper) was downgraded at both WR slots and at RB, while QB2’s team brought in Joe Horn, which player would you expect to be better in 2007?
Exactly.
Now, obviously, as a Texans fan, I have bore witness to the talent that lies with Vince Young. One need look only to a certain OT TD run to recognize that VY has talent in spades. Still, when you look at the rather pedestrian numbers he put up over the course of an entire season, one has to wonder where the expectations of playoffs (or even a match of last year’s 8 wins) come from.
And that’s without even mentioning the fact that QB1 will certainly fall victim to a certain curse this year.
Postscript: Two other points of comparison for you.
David Carr was 302-442 for 2767 yards, 11 TDs, and 12 INTs. He also had a rating of 82.1.
Randall Cunningham, in his first year as a full-time starter, went 223-406 for 2786, 23 TDs, and 12 INTs. He also rushed for 505 with 3 TDs. Oh, and he did all of this IN 12 GAMES.
*And without sandals; even Jesus needs cleats when he plays football. It’s in the Bible.
**After all, the first rule of Doggy Fight Club…
