And now for something completely different…
Oct 9, 2008 Awesomeness, Dunta Robinson, H/T Eric, Secondary issues are primary
Time for some good news.
But Monday, [Dunta Robinson] expects to be officially removed from the physically unable to perform list. Wednesday he expects to practice. And if he’s not active Oct. 19 against Detroit, he expects to go against Cincinnati the next week.
***
And he likes the idea that the expectations are so high.
“I like the fact that the fans are depending on me,” he said in a phone chat this week. “It makes you feel good. It gives you that adrenaline rush that makes you want to go out there and play for these fans. They are so into you, it’s like you’re the savior and you don’t want to disappoint them. I have a lot to play for, besides myself and my family. I definitely want to win for these fans.”
***
“I was struggling with my motion, I was trying to get my running form down,” he said. “Once I got that down, once I got my extension squared away everything kind of moved fast. I was back feeling OK. Now I am breaking, now I am jumping to catch footballs, now I am mirroring — not receivers, but the trainers — because you can’t go against the receivers when you are on PUP. And that gave me confidence.”
When he returns, the Texans will be able to get Reeves, who is often in range of plays but unable or unwilling to turn to find the ball, out of the lineup.
Hell motherflippin’ yeah, holmes!
Texans stick eight forks in my eye. I politely ask for more.
Oct 1, 2008 2008 Season, Posts that list too many players, Secondary issues are primary, What the fuck?
Eric beat me to the posting punch, but this got me riled as much as LoneSpot (I kid because I love). Via PFT:
Hamza Abdullah, Tyron Brackenridge, Courtney Bryan, Therrian Fontenot, Nick Graham, Terrence Holt, Daren Stone, and Michael Waddell each got look-sees as the Texans prepare for their 2008 home opener against a Colts team that features pass-catchers like Reggie Wayne, Marvin Harrison, Dallas Clark, and Anthony Gonzalez. It’s a must-win game for both teams; the Texans are 0-3 and the Colts are 1-2.
Of course, you could be like me and think all games are must win, but that would just be dumb, right? I mean, we WANT to lose a couple, don’t we?
But that’s not what caught my discerning eye. Oh no.
Look, I’m not the player geek I used to be, but I still consider myself to be fairly knowledgeable about league rosters. However, I only know much about Abdullah and Holt and a passing amount about a couple more. In other words, we tried out who?
Abdullah actually played ahead of Nick Ferguson in Denver last year, which means something…I have no idea what. Holt is…well, he’s CC Brown at best. Otherwise, only Daren Stone catches my eye because he’s a huge young man.
Even if we were to sign one of these, they most likely wouldn’t see PT against the Colts, which is the good news. The bad news is that the best of these may not be all that worse than CC.
Secondary issues are pri…wait a minute. Have I said this before?
Sep 29, 2008 Fire Richard Smith, Secondary issues are primary, What the fuck?, Will Demps makes love to the...ladies?
With a little luck, this could’ve been a good thing. Nope, I don’t wish that CC Brown would break his arm, considering it seems to be the only way he can tackle. But I was hoping that it might be a Wally Pipp/Lou Gehrig kinda moment. Alas, Durga’s still a prick to us Texans’ fans as Brandon Harrison may have been lost for the year during the BE-SF game.
As much as CC gives on the field, the fact is that both he and Smoove Will are both a step or two slow. Putting Harrison out there would’ve been a tremendous boost to our overall team speed. Perhaps, just perhaps, this is Dominique Barber’s chance to shine, but he wasn’t considered a speed demon coming out in the draft this year. And it’ll either be Barber or Nick Ferguson. So, you know, we’re still slow.
Oh, and you said you wanted more good news? To take CC’s spot on the roster, we signed FB Cecil Sapp.
Fuck.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to find the Bitchephant. I could use that bit of love tonight.
(h/ts to Jersey Bill and Eric, but I’d also been thinking about this post since about noon. Lousy day job…)
Breaking News: Reggie Bush still scared of Mario
Aug 14, 2008 Demarcus Faggins sucks, Reggie Bush, Reggie Bush shat himself, Secondary issues are primary, Teams that aren't the Texans
To no one’s surprise, Reggie Bush has begged out of Saturday’s game against the Texans due to an, ahem, “knee injury.”
Coach Sean Payton said that “Poor Reggie has been crying during walkthroughs all week. We had to assign Richard Justice to follow him and clean his accidental piddles. We believe it best for all parties that he sit out this week’s games. The little fellow just can’t face Mario again.”*
Bush is expected to be healthy for the third preseason game and contribute his stellar 1.9 YPC to the offense.
* May or may not be true
Kickoff - Manic depressive version
Aug 9, 2008 Kickoff, Secondary issues are primary
I just got finished paying bills. If you see a fat, bald, ugly dude drinking a Guinness and begging for money on the side of the road, that’s me. Be generous.
On the other hand, IT’S PEANUT BUTTER FOOTBALL TIME!
That’s dedicated to Southern Lion as we’re both old and senile these days. Anyway, we’ll be at BRB taking advantage of their auto-refresh and bandwidth. Shake’s promised to bring enough beer for everybody.
Pancakes on Gibbs: No, it’s not the latest in Two Girls/One Cup. Pancakes takes a look at Alex Gibbs, with whom I seem to have a few things in common, which is kinda cool. Aficionado of European history? Check! Fanatical gardener? Check! Gourmet cook? Check. Fan of the chop block? Let’s just say, that little girl will never cut in line on anyone again.
Secondary issues are still primary: Obviously, teams won’t be bringing out the big guns in the pre-season, but how our slightly refurbished secondary holds up over the next four games will be a major harbinger to the regular season. Even though Paul Kuharsky comes from the land of the BE-SFs, he seems to be paying attention to what’s going on in Houston. Obviously, this gives him a leg up on every other national reporter and pre-pubescent shits on crappy blogs. No offense to other pre-pubescent shits who hang around here and are actually cool and knowledgeable. 
Brett Favre: bfd’s take: There seems to be some consternation that Brett Favre’s joining the J-E-T-S MESS MESS MESS! is going to ruin our run at a wildcard birth. Frankly, I disagree and I will go on record as saying I believe Favre will hurt the team. After all, Favre was the worst qualifying QB by rating in 2005, and he was only slightly better in 2006. 2007 seems, at best, to be a classic last-gasp outlier from a normal career performance curve on its way downhill. On top of that, he’s going into a new and complex offense without a top-notch set of weapons.
My guess is that he winds up with a rating within 5 points of 70 and more interceptions than TDs. I also don’t believe he plays all 16 games. There’s no rational reason to believe that he is suddenly having a career changing resurgence at the age of 39.
If we, the Texans, take care of our shit, then we’ll have nothing to worry about.
As Tex would say, “Goodbye and….
…..
…..
good luck.”
Edit: Whoops, h/t to Eric for a couple of the links here. You know, the sane ones.
All-Time Texans Team - Defense - SS
Jul 21, 2008 All-Time Texans, Awfulness, Secondary issues are primary, Stats
Continuing the series and sticking with positions that make the prospect of drinking bleach seem pleasant, let’s do the Strong Safeties.
First, the candidates:
Eric Brown
Glenn Earl
C.C. Brown
Be still, my beating heart. Eric Brown gave us .5 sack, 1.5 INTs, 1.5 FFs, 1.5 PDs, and about 70 tackles per season in his 2 years as a starter. In two-seasons worth of starts, Earl averaged 1 sack, 1.5 INTs, .5 FF, 5 PDs, and about 70 tackles. Last year, pressed into duty as the strong safety, C.C. (whose real name is Ceandris Nehemiah, so I don’t understand the two Cs) Brown offered up 0 sacks, 1 INT, 2 FF, 3 FR, 8 PDs, and about 80 tackles. (All number via Pro-Football-Reference.com)
Hmm.
Blech.
I guess C.N. Brown wins again by default, purely on the strength of his turnover numbers and the fact that he bothered to defend some passes.
(Side note: I left Marlon McCree off the FS discussion, not that it would have changed anything. My bad.)
Bennett. Fred Bennett. Revisited.
Jul 21, 2008 Demarcus Faggins sucks, Dunta Robinson, Faggination, Secondary issues are primary, The Fred, The Future, Training camp 2008
In response to the article quoted in this post, I emailed KC Joyner and asked for a little more explanation of the methodology. He was kind enough to reply.
Try this on for an expansion:
In Scientific Football 2008 and my 2008 Draft Guide (both of which can be ordered at www.TheFootballScientist.com) I rated matchups by color ranking, with red being difficult, yellow being average and green being favorable. Against red matchup WRs in 2007 (those that gained 9.0 YPA or higher), Bennett allowed only 6.8 YPA. That’s very good (29th best out of 95 qualifiers) but it pales in comparison to how Bennett handled yellow rated (7-9 YPA) and green rated (less than 7 YPA) WRs. His 3.3 versus yellow rated was the 2nd best in the league and his 3.0 against green rated was tied for 19th. Add them all up and his overall YPA against WRs was 2nd best in the league. I’ve been touting him as a future Pro Bowl candidate for how well he played last year.
So, hopefully, that clears it up a bit more. Bennett was good against top-notch receivers, very good against mediocre guys, and downright dominant against the guys in-between. The good news being, of course, that if you assume talent is distributed on a bell curve, Bennett (and all corners) are going to face a lot more “yellow” receivers than “red” or “green” ones.
Now, I know this seems foreign to us as Texans fans, but IF Molden really is ahead of where Bennett was this time last year (as sources seem to be saying) AND IF Ray Rhodes really saw enough talent in Jacques Reeves that the organization thought Reeves was worth that price tag AND IF Dunta comes back at even 90% of where he was…well, kids, we might just be in the enviable situation of having too many very good (or better) CBs. (And, as a bonus, we can finally give Petey his walking papers.) Even better, with only one or two of those IFs coming to fruition, we are finally set at CB.
This is all foreign and slightly frightening. Hold me.
Bennett. Fred Bennett.
Jul 18, 2008 2008 Season, Dunta Robinson, Secondary issues are primary, The Fred, The Future
From the latest issue of ESPN the Magazine:
You heard it here first: these four defenders will bust out in ‘08.
By K.C. Joyner, The Football ScientistSleepers? Not exactly. More like Leonardo DiCaprio circa What’s Eating Gilbert Grape. You immediately spotted greatness, but the rest of the world needed some time to recognize it. Each of these defensive players is 24 or younger, and all are on the cusp of that magical tipping point.
[...]
FRED BENNETT
CB, Texans
To experts who say Dunta Robinson is the best corner in Houston, think again. Bennett is not only better than Robinson, the stats say he was the premier corner in the league last season. The 24-year-old Bennett, a fourth-round pick in 2007, actually had better metrics in his eight starts than any numbers Robinson has posted in his four-year career. Bennett’s 4.7 overall YPA led the league among corners with 60-plus attempts, and opposing WRs gained only 67 total yards on the 24 combined medium, deep and bomb passes he faced. With pass-happy teams like the Steelers, Colts and Browns on Houston’s sked in 2008, Bennett’s name will be on everyone’s lips.
Here’s the link, though I don’t know if it will work if you don’t have ESPN Insider. If not, you’re not missing much, as I’ve included all the relevant text anyway. I have an email in to KC and I will update this post if he responds.
Until then, just consider this a very, VERY good sign. If Rhodes can do something with Reeves and/or Molden blossoms, then getting Dunta back is gravy and we suddenly have a real reason to consider moving him to Free Safety. (For further reasons Dunta would make a great free safety, see my last post re: our FSs past.)
All-Time Texans Team - Defense - FS
Jul 18, 2008 All-Time Texans, Secondary issues are primary, You'd like to think I was joking
Yeah, that’s right. BFD came up with the idea for these posts and I claim-jumped the defense. Because that’s how I roll. And because I didn’t want to pull my hair out figuring out our best LT. Since BFD is already balding, that won’t be an issue for him.
BUT, since he was a trooper and started with WR2, I can’t totally take the easy way out and start with, say, DE. So, let’s take a look at the FS position. In case of nausea, there are airsickness bags in the seatback in front of you.
The candidates:
Matt Stevens
Marcus Coleman
C.C. Brown
Von Hutchins
Will Demps
Ugh. Hold on for just a second.
*bangs head on desk repeatedly*
OK…so, it obviously can’t be Matt Stevens because he is on the short list of “Worst Texan ever.” It can’t be Von Hutchins because he was always nothing more than a stop-gap CB-turned-FS. And he was awful more often than not. Coleman, likewise, was a corner in free safety clothing. And Demps has yet to give us a full season (and, apparently, has manos de piedra).
Congrats, C.C.! Just like Corey Bradford, you win by default! You’re like the prettiest girl in Oklahoma!
Kickoff
Jun 19, 2008 2008 Season, Colvin, Money Money Money, Secondary issues are primary, Teams that aren't the Texans, Tremendous Busts
Maximum Reward, Minimum Kwan. Via BRB, who still collectively possess the will to read John McClain, we get the terms of Rosevelt Colvin’s contract. On a scale of 1-10, this deal ranks a solid 9. Worst case scenario, Colvin makes the team, gets injured and placed on IR in week 1, and we cut him as a June 1 casualty next year–he only counts $250,000 against the cap in 2009 and 2010. Best case scenario, we have a bona fide third-down edge rusher and sometime LB who still isn’t costing us much of anything.
Hello, Vegas? Gimme $500 on black. D’oh…ok, I’ll send you a check. Thinking of betting on the Texans week 1 game against the Stillers? Here’s some interesting background regarding both teams against the spread and straight up last year. If you read this and win, I get 5%.
What say you? Not long ago, we signed the other Jimmy Williams and I lamented the fact that I’d hope it was the Jimmy Williams we’d all heard off. Well, Atlanta went at cut that J-Dub yesterday, raising an interesting question: Do you take a flier on a guy who hardly got to play because his secondary coach hated him, but who is really fast and was thought to be the best DB in the draft only a few years ago? Stated different, do you take a guy whose talent should make him light-years better than CC Brown and see what Ray Rhodes can do with him?
Kickoff
Jun 6, 2008 Andre Johnson, Athletes who don't stab people, Colvin, Cool dudes with cool cars, Kickoff, Secondary issues are primary, Super Mario, The Fred, Wal-Mart kills babies
Cars Go Vroom: Remember that Lamborghini video from last year that showed Mario Williams driving roughly 600 MPH? Yeah, totally understandable…because Mario has an addiction. To cars. No, seriously. ”At age 21, Williams actually entered the league with a list of expensive vehicles he planned to purchase after being drafted.”
Overstating The Obvious: From the AP’s Kristie Rieken: “With [Dunta] Robinson likely out until midseason with an injury, [Fred] Bennett knows it’s now up to him to lead the group until his mentor returns.” Tomorrow: Water is wet, the sky is blue, and Cowboys fans are insufferable.
Our bad: As first reported at BRB, Wal-Mart pulled a total dick move and refused to give underprivileged kids ice and water when Andre Johnson “only” purchased 677 bikes (at full retail) instead of the 750 he ordered (and they failed to provide). Well, apparently Wal-Mart realized that this was potentially bad PR, so they donated 400 free bikes to the cause, as well as food, water, and ice.
Daily Colvin Story: Not only did Rosy visit the Texans (and Colts), he underwent physicals for both teams and, according to Rotoworld, passed both. As an aside, Rotoworld also speculates that the Texans are primarily interested in him as a SLB, which I am totally in favor of.
Note: I am leaving for Gulf Shores around lunchtime, so this is it for me today most likely.
Dahling, with the first pick the Texans will take…
Apr 11, 2008 2008 Draft, Amobi Okoye is 20, Boobies, Dancing With the 'Tards, Little Dickie Justice, Pancakes McTard, Please let the season start soon, Secondary issues are primary, Will Demps makes love to the...ladies?
On TexansTV (under Special Segments), Pancakes (in his best Howard Morris voice) predicts the Texans will take Aqib Talib.
Here’s hoping that Pancakes, as always, is wrong. Again.
Now, I’m not saying that the Texans don’t have a need at CB - oh no, far from it - so give Pancakes credit for actually picking a position of need (I think we know that Little Dickie Justice would be pushing to trade all our picks for *longing sigh* Vincy-pooh). Talib has considerable character issues, which, as the article states, has caused many teams to drop him off their boards completely. Last year, we did draft ManChild even after he admitted wearing green sweaters, but Talib has had a tough time staying out of trouble.
Then, when you consider his tendency to be downright toastable in pass coverage, we have a combination that can be beat with our first round pick. I just can’t see the Texans taking Talib here, though it’s not impossible, but I hope we go in a different direction.
_____________________
I don’t have time for a separate post, but guess which Texans’ ladies man extraordinaire will be a judge at the Texans’ cheerleaders competition? Could they have possibly chosen anybody better than Will Demps? Check out the TexansTV link above under Football.
The interview is so banal all the way until he’s asked about the judging, and then he’s more flustered than…well, than I would be around a bunch of scantily clad hotties jumping up and down and up and down and up and down in front of me. As DiehardChris, who sent the link, mentioned: you can see his face light up. You can see Demps trying to figure out how to bed them all.
Bud Adams > Satan, and goodbye, wifebeater!
Apr 6, 2008 Babyeating-Sisterfuckers, Bud Adams is evil, Fuck the Cowboys, Jerome Mathis got hurt reading this, Secondary issues are primary
Bud Adams and the rest of the Babyeating-Sisterfuckers are flipping us the bird once again, celebrating the 10 year anniversary of the team in Nashville. So, when we play them twice this year, we need not only put up with Little Dickie Justice’s incessant Vince Young cock-slobbering but also with that new Babyeating-Sisterfuckers logo.
Bud? Satan is eagerly awaiting your arrival. Between throwing tornadoes at Arkansas, the bullshit in the Middle East, and the reunion of New Kids on the Block*, poor Satan is running out of ideas. Asshole.
Finally, some good news. Pit bull afficionado and unaccomplished wifebeater Jerome Mathis signed with the Washington Politically Incorrect Redskins. To that I say, good riddance to bad garbage: you and Daniel Snyder are a whiny match made in Heaven.
Oh, what’s that? I’m a stinkin’ hypocrite because I’m the same guy that wants to trade for Pacman Jones? Well, you are partially right. To me, the difference is that Mr. Glass had his toughness and commitment to the team questioned continuously, while Pacman is considered a hard-worker and good teammate.
Here’s hoping everybody has a tornado free weekend!
* Is it me, or do you think Little Dickie Justice, age 12, sprouted wood the moment he heard about the reunion?
Life without Teh Schaub
Mar 1, 2008 2008 Draft, Rosie Rosenfels, Secondary issues are primary
Consider the following:You awake tomorrow morning to find that Matt Schaub has ceased to exist.1 He has not died, mind you. Rather, his entire existence from June 25, 1981 through March 2, 2008 has been completely erased from both recorded history and our collective conscience. He has never existed and the name “Matt Schaub” does not conjure up the words “NFL quarterback” any more readily than do the names “Seamus McNamara” or “David Carr.”
As part of this exercise, assume that the 2008 season played out exactly the same in terms of final record, but with Sage Rosenfels at the helm the entire time. His season stats (based on extrapolating his 9 games2 over a full slate) were along the lines of 274 completions, 2994 yards, 27 TD, 21 INT, 11 sacks, and 7 fumbles.3
For the purposes of filling out a roster, assume that our backup QB for the entire 2008 season was the incomparable Bradlee Van Pelt. All other roster spots remain exactly as they were during the season, including injuries and free agent signings. And, for the sake of continuity, assume that we do have a second round pick.
NOW…with all of that considered, answer the following:
1. Do you think the Texans have a realistic playoff shot with Rosenfels at the helm for sixteen games in 2008?
2. Are you evaluating this year’s draft with the idea of taking a Brian Brohm, Andre Woodson, or the like if one should fall to you in the first or second?
3. Does it bother you that your starting QB is turning 30 in four days?
I suppose my point here is unsubtle. In short form, it is this: If you remove the “can Schaub survive a full season” question from the equation, the idea of Sage Rosenfels QBing this team suddenly becomes much less appealing. As a backup, people (by which I mean both fans of this team and fans of other teams) think he is a valuable asset. And, to an extent, they are right. I mean, we could be saddled with Bradlee Van Pelt as our backup for real. Or worse.
However—as I have been preaching since god knows when—it makes no sense to me to turn down actual value for a person that under the best case scenario will not even see the field. If Minnesota wants to offer you a third-pick for Rosenfels, turning down that offer is the equivalent of saying “no, no thanks…we have no need for extra draft picks.” If the Patriots didn’t want to trade Matt Cassell under that line of reasoning, at least it would make sense on some level; they
could argue (albeit not convincingly) that they have no holes that need to be addressed via draft. But, for this team—a team with holes in most of the secondary, at DE2 and NT, at RB, and (arguably) at SLB and a couple places on the O-line—I cannot fathom holding onto a BACKUP QB when you could conceivably address a STARTING hole elsewhere by trading him.
I do realize that removing the “Schaub variable” from the equation is a bit of sophistry. After all, that is something that we do have to weigh when considering the 2008 season and beyond. But, here’s the deal, if it turns out that Schaub really is the white Jerome Mathis4, you are going to be hard-pressed to find anyone who truly believes that Rosenfels is the long-term answer at QB. So, by not trading him, you are saying that you want to hold on to a guy who you would not like as your starter for an extended stretch because you are afraid the QB you mortgaged the near future for is fragile. Worse, you are saying that you don’t want to trade the guy you hope doesn’t start despite the fact that trading him would allow you to address actual needs in the draft and basically recoup part of what you spent on the QB that you hope does start. (That is, trading him for a third-round pick more or less means that you traded Sage Rosenfels, two seconds and moved down two draft slots in the first for Matt Schaub and a 2008 third, assuming you buy the
idea that Sage was expendable when the deal for Schaub was made, which I don’t think is much of a stretch.)
Looking back over what I’ve just written, I realize that it is hardly novel. This is, with a few minor changes, the same argument I’ve been making since somewhere around week 12 or 13. My only new point here, I suppose, is that I absolutely reject and denounce the idea that you have to decide whether to keep Rosenfels based on what you think Schaub’s health status is likely to be in 2008. If we can all agree that we would not be happy with Rosenfels right now had Schaub never
existed, then it is curious (at best) to want to hold on to him now.
I also refuse to buy the idea that you need two QBs in this league. The Giants did not succeed due to the presence of Jared Lorenzen. The Patriots did not win 18 straight because they had a strong backup. The Colts don’t worry whether Jim Sorgi is really the insurance they need if Manning goes down. The Saints backup is…um…I actually can’t remember off-hand. Etc. Basically, I don’t know where the idea that you have to have two quality QBs in the modern NFL even stems from.5 What you “have” to have is a team that does not have a glaring hole and instead has a roster populated with guys who are above average at worst. Having depth at QB but no talent at two or three starting positions is near worthless.
It’s not often you can markedly improve your team without trading a starter or a draft pick. Let’s not ignore such an opportunity right now.
1 Obviously, an exercise that requires you to imagine how you would respond to the non-existence of something that currently exists is inherently flawed. Ignore this.
2 I realize he didn’t start 9 games, but one of his very best games (the home loss against TN) was a non-start, so these things should even out enough to make this whole thing worthwhile.
3 I suppose I could just combine his and the no-longer-existent Schaub’s numbers for the full season, but the extrapolation seems more fair. We are all about fair in our posts here at DGDB&D. Unless we are talking about Petey Faggins and/or Travis Johnson. Screw those guys.
4 In terms of fragility, not in terms of dog rearing and domestic relationships.
5 Now, a person could argue that you need a serviceable backup if you have such a horrid O-line that you are likely to get your starter hurt. In such a situation, though, when the options are hold on your serviceable backup or trade him for a draft pick that could be used to bolster the line and then sign a different serviceable backup (Brian Griese?), taking the former route doesn’t improve the team at all while the latter does. And that should be the goal.
Quick notes - 2/29
Feb 29, 2008 Secondary issues are primary
I’ve got a super busy day today, but there were a couple of haps last night/this morning to talk about.
Happy trails to Jerome Mathis. Wait, not happy trails. What’s the term I am looking for? Oh yeah. Jerome, bite me. See ya,pal.
“Word out of Houston” is that the Texans and Vikes have broken off trade talks, which would send Houston a pick for Sage Rosenfels. I can’t even begin to tell you how disappointed that makes me. Sage for anything would kick ass. The sad fact is that, with Sage at the helm, I don’t think we are a playoff capable team. He’s a backup. He had a career year. It’s called trading high. Take a 3rd and 4th or 5th for him, and be happy.
C Rex Hadnot is coming in for a visit. The Lufkin native likely has Houston at the top of his charts, but we don’t need to acquire another C who’s not an appreciable upgrade (if at all) over what we already have…especially when he wants $5MM/year. We need a LT. Let’s save some dough for one of those.
Jacques Reeves, formerly of the Dallas Childmolesters, is coming in for a visit. The dude is going to strike it rich, and he’s got literal cleat marks on his back. He was picked on all year by opposing offenses. If we are the team to make him rich, I can guarantee that I will make him the new bfd DGDB&D whipping boy. DO NOT SIGN HIS ASS! EDIT: What Tim said.
Finally, a dios to Cedric Killings, who is retiring after his horrific neck injury last year against the Dolts. As I’ve gotten older, I realize how hard it is to stop doing something you love due to physical limitations. There are many athletes who just go too long and lose their quality of life as a result. Killings has physically returned to normal, but he is at great risk for permanent injury in case he has a similar collision. I feel for him, but I also congratulate him on his career and, most importantly, on his decision.
* Source: Everything from rotoworld.com, which is saving my lazy ass this morning.
Please? PLEASE?!?
Feb 28, 2008 2008 Draft, Demarcus Faggins sucks, Mutants, Roster, Secondary issues are primary
I know I am on record various places as saying I absolutely do not want to draft a CB with our first pick, primarily because I hate the idea of “Fred and Rookie CB” as our starting tandem. (Then again, I’d take a number of 7th graders over Petey and he was one half of our duo at this point last season, so it could be much worse.)
Anyway…I have to amend that position a bit. I absolutely do not want to draft a CB with our first pick unless Dominique Rodgers-Cromartie falls to 18.
40-yard dash? 4.33 (3d among CBs).
Vertical jump? 38.5 (1st among CBs).
Broad jump? 10′11″ (1st among CBs).
Three-cone drill? 6.74 sec (T-1st among CBs).
60-yard shuttle? 11.06 sec (1st among CBs).
Wow.
Holy fucking jeez, even.
And before any of you mentions that “combine numbers are overblown–what matters is on-field performance,” take a gander at this:
In 39 starts for the Tigers, opposing quarterbacks completed just 55 of 161 passes (34.16%) thrown in Rodgers-Cromartie’s immediate area. He intercepted 11 of those throws, deflected 25 and held the opposition to a miniscule 3.54 yards per pass attempt, the best of any collegiate defensive back over the last three seasons.
I think I am in love. I put him just below Felix Jones and above Kenny Phillips (who, luckily might actually slip due to a mediocre combine) on my wish list.
Time to make it rain in Houston?
Feb 28, 2008 HPD, Pacman Jones' gunrack, Predictions Guaranteed To Go Wrong, Secondary issues are primary
As I write this, I have Elmore James singing “The Sky is Crying” in the back of my head, and I think I know why.
As reported in Nashville’s City Paper (ironically, an old client of mine from many years ago), Pacman Jones “has been given permission by the Tennessee Titans to pursue a trade.”
Now, let’s see here. Texans have a huge need for help at CB? Check. Houston has serious zoning issues? Check. The Crystal Pistol? Check. Houston has the highest strip joints/capita in the nation? Check and check.*
Can you say match made in heaven?
Seriously, though, and tip your waitress, I have no problem giving up a 5th round pick or so and taking a chance on Pacman. Fact is, he’s still only 25, and I really don’t have a problem with taking chances on people who have made mistakes in the past, especially when considering he’ll be relatively cheap to acquire. The Texans’ locker room seems to have strong character people, and something might click for Pacman. I mean, who among us wasn’t arrested six times in their 20s? Sheesh.
Sometimes, the gamble pays off, and this one could be huge. Just say yes to Pacman. What do y’all think?
Anyway, how can I possibly thank the person who brought the phrase “make it rain” into my every day vocabulary enough? You simply can’t pay back that kind of reward.
* Yeah, I made that shit up, though I wouldn’t doubt it.
Huff-ing, Fluffing, and Zach
Feb 25, 2008 2008 Draft, 2008 Season, Bad Idea Jeans, Dancing With the 'Tards, Demarcus Faggins sucks, Dunta Robinson, Fluff, Secondary issues are primary, Teams that aren't the Texans
Michael Huff, the versatile defensive back of the Oakland Raiders, is on the trading block (h/t to Jersey Bill). The 2005 Thorpe Award winner was a badass for the Longhorns (as are all Longhorns, natch), but the Raiders in their infinite wisdom decided to take a 4.34 guy and put him at SS. Ummm, yeah, that turned out to be a pretty bad idea (their experiment to insert Randy Moss as a blocking tight end didn’t work out well, either).
If there is a more humble group of people than the Raiders Nation, it could only be a clown car full of Gandhis, so let’s see what nice things they have to say about Huff:
Einstein says: “Huff reminds me of Najee Mustafa or Elvis Patterson. He sucks, how he even receives and NFL check is beyond me. And to think this waste of roster spot was a first round pick. What a complete bust. He is probably one of the biggest busts the Raiders have ever drafted.”
Bodiddly says: “The Raiders scouting department needs an overhaul,they have missed on more than they have hit.Look at the winning teams draft history and you will seldom see a safety drafted so high.Now the team is stuck with this player that is over paid due his high draft position.No team is likely to pay more than a bargain price for a player
in this salary category if he’s not an outstanding contributor.” (if a post ever needed the {sic} notation, this would be it}
Granted, there are a lot of commenters on this post who get it: Huff is a FS or CB, not a SS. As we have previously agreed, there often is not a huge difference between the FS and SS. However, with guys like Antonio Gates and Kellen Winslow in the league, covering and being able to tackle tight ends is an essential part of the job, one that Huff had difficulty in doing because of his size.
Perhaps the Raiders realize this. And, perhaps, with a roster already loaded with CBs like Fabian Washington, Stanford Routt, and Nnamdi Asomugha, the Raiders believe they have some depth (and salary) to trade.
In many ways, Huff would be a great pick up because of his versatility. If Dunta is 100%, Huff easily slides into FS. If Dunta loses a step, Huff sticks at corner and Dunta moves to FS.
There is a genuine question on if Huff can play CB in the NFL. At UT, he had a reputation as a hard, self-motivated worker, and that 4.34 speed doesn’t hurt, either (as a benchmark, Huff’s 4.34 would be 3rd for RBs and tops for WRs this year (DBs haven’t run yet). At 6′ and 205 lbs, he has good size, as well.
The bigger problem is, what would it take to grab the Nimitz High (and therefore Houston) native. It’s a huge contract on top of giving something up. The Raiders don’t exactly have a friendly trading history, either, with Al Davis a well-known trading asshole.
As for Brian Kelly? I vote for “Just say no.” First, he lost his starting job in TB to P-Buch. Secondly, he’s 32 and has obviously lost a step. Third, P-Buch took away his job. Finally, we don’t run the Cover 2, the defense he’s most familiar with and one that covers his weaknesses (aka, coverage and anything related) well.
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Just, holy crap. This is considered journalism? “And I wish each one of you could be here with me.” That’s really what it’s all about for you, isn’t it?
Whenever the traditional media shits on blogs for not following journalistic standards, think of this article.
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Zach Thomas, thanks to {insert deity of your choice here}, signed with the Cowpokes. There’s just a poetic, ironic justice at work here. I wish both ZT and the ‘pokes a nice, downhill ride off into the sunset together. Actually, I take that back. I wish ZT a pleasant farewell. The cowboys. still. suck.
If Anna-Megan could read, she’d rip us off, too.
Feb 25, 2008 2008 Draft, Bloggerating, Dancing With the 'Tards, Fuck the Cowboys, Houston Chronicle, I really dig my readers, Megan Manfull is retarded, Pancakes McTard, Roster, Secondary issues are primary, Teams that aren't the Texans, The Future
Now, I know that at least once before, I wrote a post about the Chron ripping off something that happened here and passing it off as original. I was subsequently accused of being overreaching, paranoid, and narcissistic (none of which I can dispute). Whatever. Let’s ride that horse again.
I got an email from Jersey Bill tonight, pointing out a little similarity between a comment he made and a column written by Megan Manfull. Bill writes:
I honestly believe it is a testament to Al Gore’s Internet that this could happen. Notice the post date and time [of this Megan Manfull column]. I put up the same thing about 3 hours before she did in BFD’s CB post. Now, I’m not claiming that I had inside knowledge and this an exclusive. I’m saying that a goof who likes to read a blog about the Texans throws out the same question, and on a nothing doing day, it ends up in a major media website. This pretty much takes another stomp at the dead horse, but how lazy could these writers be? I wouldn’t mind that much, but all these smarmy writers takes shots at fan sites and blogs whenever they get a chance.
Interesting. Let’s investigate. First, Jersey Bill’s comment on BFD’s post about CBs.
Jersey Bill replies at 24th February 2008, 3:42 pm :
Brian Kelly (Bucs CB) opted out of his contract and Michael Huff is available via trade. Wouldn’t it be nice to grab those two with one fell swoop? Certainly would change the draft board.
Now, for Megan’s missive.
How does safety Michael Huff sound for Texans?
There are reports around Oakland that former Longhorns safety Michael Huff is on the trading block. With the draft full of offensive tackles and cornerbacks, the Texans will be looking for safeties in free agency. Anyone want to see Huff become a Texan?Posted by Megan Manfull at February 24, 2008 07:25 PM
Is it completely plausible that Manfull heard the rumor elsewhere and thought it would provide thought-provoking fodder for her blog. I realize that. At the same time, it is awful convenient (as Bill points out) that on a day when next to nothing is happening other than the combine, Manfull writes a blog entry about something that was posted here three hours prior. (This is where I would say “verrrrry interesting” and stroke my long white beard if I were an evil mastermind.)
It’s ok, Megan. There is no shame in reading DGDB&D. Well, other than some of the stuff BFD writes, that is. All we ask is that you give a little nod or hat tip or some kind of Lilith Fair fish taco wave or whatever.
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In other, related news, I hope to have some sort of rundown of Combine results tomorrow or Tuesday. My wife and this damned fetus are in “well, it could fall out at any point” mode, so I promise nothing. Actually, that’s not true–I promise a Romo-Simpson wedding post at some point real soon. And if Pancakes does the fake conversation before I do, I will kill a puppy.
On the horns of an enema - Scraps at CB
Feb 21, 2008 2008 Draft, 2008 Season, Casserly blows goats... I have proof, DeAngelo Hall, Demarcus Faggins sucks, Dunta Robinson, I hate everything, Nnamdi Asomugha, Secondary issues are primary
Now that Nnamdi Asomugha has broken Matt’s heart like so many Anna-Megans, let’s take a look at some of the least sucky options at cornerback still available.
Marcus Trufant - Franchise tag. Not a surprising move by the Seasquawks, but it means he’s out.
DeAngelo Hall - Yeah, we have consensus that he’s an asswipe. I’ve always been of the opinion, however, that as long as you play for the team, being an asswipe isn’t all bad (see Sanders, Deion). But I’m not sure if Hall qualifies for that level. And considering the baggage he carries, and that the Falcons allegedly want a first round pick for him, fuck him. Of course, there’s the chance that we can dick the Falcons on a deal again, which definitely gives me warm fuzzies.
Asante Samuel - We’ve previously brushed Samuel aside for contract size reasons, but considering what Trufant and Nnamdi are getting, is that the market for a CB? Perhaps it’s now something to consider?
Lito Sheppard - A dirty, unsubstantiated rumor has the Eagles interested in Samuel because they think Sheppard has a glass jaw. If the Eagles do sign Samuel, I think Sheppard is gone.
Jacques Reeves - Ugh, a cowpoke, and one who was picked on during the year. But, sheesh, this is the territory we are starting to hit. Reeves is an unrestricted free agent.
Randall Gay - When watching the Patriots this year, it seemed to me that the Pats had two weak links in their secondary: King Asshole Rodney Harrison, and Randall Gay. Yet, Gay might be the most likely option as of today. Still, Gay can be flammable at times, and I kinda see him as a more expensive Petey. There, I said it..
Brian Kelly - Dude, you lost your job to P-Buch? Seriously? What, did you fall asleep on the field?
Drayton Florence - You can add him to the flammable list.
Chris Carr - Has seen most of his action on special teams, including as a punt returner.
Have I missed anybody?
Look at this list. It’s pretty pathetic at this point. There’s a chance somebody like Ricky Manning becomes available after the first round of salary cuts, and I wouldn’t mind him in the least. But, still, the lack of feasible CBs, along with Dunta’s injury, means that we have to address CB a lot sooner than later. Even though I am against huge mega-contracts, I think Samuel may be the only decent option out there, even if we have to overpay.
The way I look at it: we either overpay for mediocrity, or we overpay for above average production.
Or, of course, we take a CB in the draft with our 1st or 3rd round pick.
PS: Look, Matt, I bolded names all by myself. I’m a big boy today!
PPS: If you can name the show from where I got the reference in the title, give yourself a cookie.
