DGDB&D: a Texans blog.

We got a thing goin’ on

Aug 29, 2007 Jacoby Jones is slighty less unheralded, National Media, Preseason 2007, Special Teams, Training camp 2007

Ask any Texans fan what he or she thinks of Jacoby Jones and the answer you get will likely include phrases such as “simply amazing,” “great draft pick,” and “want him to be my baby-daddy.” Having your way with the Dallas Cowboys will get you that kind of respect, and deservedly so.

Jones might not be the leagues best-kept secret for much longer, though. It looks like the national media is catching wind of the greatness that is JJ. NFL.com’s Adam Schefter writes

Last year Bears rookie Devin Hester rocked the football world, returning punts for touchdowns and the Bears to NFC prominence.

This year, Texans rookie Jacoby Jones could do the same.

Three weeks into the preseason, no rookie has shined anymore than Jones, who has been a threat as a punt returner and a wide receiver.

The 6-foot-2, 210-pound Jones has caught eight passes, including one that went for a 19-yard touchdown against the Dallas Cowboys.

As a punt returner, Jones has brought back two for touchdowns in each of the Texans past two preseason games –- one for 81 yards against Arizona, the other for 90 yards against Dallas — and there could have been a third if Jones weren’t narrowly tripped up in Houston’s preseason opener against Hester’s Bears.

The Texans recognize Jones’ talents already, and have for quite some time. While many teams forecasted Jones as a fifth- or sixth-round pick, the Texans picked him in the third round. They liked him then; they like him even more now.

Jones was something of an unknown coming from tiny Lane College. There were questions about Jones’ small hands and dropped passes. But Jones hasn’t dropped anything this summer. It’s starting to look as if other teams dropped the ball on not picking Jones sooner.

Seriously… how cool is that? I know that there’s a list as long as my arm of guys who flashed in training camp, but never did anything in the pros. Hell, we’ve had a few of them. But Jones seems legit. Even if he can’t return punts for TDs in 10 or 11 games this season, we’ll still be more than pleased with what he brings to the table. As long as he treats the Titans like he treated the girls from up north.

The Big Babinski

Aug 17, 2007 Jason Babin, Posts that list too many players, Preseason 2007, Super Mario, Teams that aren't the Texans, Training camp 2007, Tremendous Busts

During the three months I’ve been doing this bloggifying, I’ve made little secret of the fact that I am pro-Jason Babin. (Don’t believe me? See here. Don’t ever doubt me.)

So, with that in mind, I was happy to see how well J-Bab¹ played last Saturday. He wasn’t just impressive–he turned in not-so-arguably the best defensive lineman performance of the night for either team. Kubiak certainly noticed in the post game press conference.

[W]hen you look at the second group, there were some guys that really stood out. Jason Babin being number one, played extremely well.

Yesterday, Kubiak was again asked about Babin’s progress throughout camp. The message was still positive.

I said this many of times. We’ve had a lot of conversations about Travis [Johnson] and Jerome [Mathis] at this camp, but Jason needs to get into that conversation because he’s really dedicated himself to our program, to Dan [Riley], to what Jethro [Franklin] and Frank [Bush] are trying to do and it shows. He stood out last week as much as any guy we had up front so I’m looking forward to Jason having a good year (emphasis added)

For Kubiak, that damn near qualifies as gushing.

Anyway, considering how unlikely it seemed even a month ago that the words “Jason” and “Babin” and “extremely well” would be uttered in some sort of succession, it’s probably not surprising that the Chronic would run with the story, taking the “change of coaching is responsible” angle.

Franklin has worked on improving Babin’s technique and his mental approach.

‘That’s the thing about it, this game is so mental,’ Franklin said. ‘Mentally, he was probably all over the place. Hopefully now, he’s a little more focused on himself and not other people around him. He’s more focused on his body in terms of body mechanics.

‘I give them things they can hang their hat on. That’s what I try to give them. Try to get them some tools. If you give them some tools, hopefully they can build you a strong bridge.’

All of this is well and good; to a certain extent, I’m sure that new, simplified coaching has helped Babin. However, just as important–and mentioned only ever so slightly–is that Jason has matured professionally to the point where the initial expectations for him are now becoming reasonable.

Very few defensive ends go from being a good college player to a good professional in one year.² The ones that do are usually the freaks of nature like Dwight Freeney and Julius Peppers (13 and 12 sacks, respectively, as rookies). More common, even with guys like Jason Taylor (5 sacks as a rookie) who go on to become great pass rushers, is a learning curve of at least one year. Taylor, for instance, went from 5 to 9.5, but then dropped to 2.5 his third year. Leonard Little played in 6 games each of his first two season–due to that pesky prison term for vehicular manslaughter–and recorded no sacks in either. Michael Strahan recorded 1 in 9 games as a rookie, followed by 4.5 in 15 games in year 2. Aaron Kampman notched 2.5 total in his first 24 games. The list goes on and on. Point is, it was ridiculous to expect a kid from a small directional Michigan school to jump right to the NFL and become a dominant pass rusher.

Of course, the old regime decided to up the difficulty for Babin by moving him from DE–where he was just asked to go forward–to outside linebacker in the 3-4–where he was expected to work in space, move in all directions, and cover the occasional TE. Funny thing is, Babin performed reasonably well in this role, notching 4 sacks and 4 passes defensed while starting all 16 games as a rookie. By 2005, he’d lost his starting gig, but he put up another 4 sacks as the words “bust” started being bandied about. Last year, with a new (read: non-retarded) coach, Babin was moved back to DE and in spot starts had 5 sacks.

That’s 13 sacks in three seasons, only one year as a full-time starter, which is more than Strahan or Kampman (and more consistent than Taylor). Now, of course, I am not suggesting that Babin will ever become Jason Taylor (or Michael Strahan); rather, I am just pointing out that at one point, no one thought Jason Taylor would become Jason Taylor.

All of that said, I think it’s pretty clear that I am nothing but thrilled with the “sudden” emergence of Babin this summer. Two plays last Saturday hinted that he might be on the verge of becoming the other pass rushing DE–first, when he came off the weakside edge, flew down the line, and brought down Cedric Benson from behind, and, second, when he powered through the strongside double team and made the play. (Ironically, both of those plays were against the run, though the knock on Babin is that he is a liability in run defense.)

So, where does that leave us in terms of a starting D-line? Assuming Anthony Weaver is not ready to go week 1, which seems a safer assumption by the day, I think you still have to pencil ND Kalu in as the starter at LDE, at least for now. Kalu is no spring chicken, though, so I think a pretty heavy dose of Babin might be involved there as well. Also, much like last year, there is talk that Weaver will move to DT on obvious passing downs, clearing the way for Kalu or Babin at times even after Weavs returns.

It wouldn’t surprise me at all to see the line change depending on how “obvious” the passing down is and, more importantly, how long the yardage is (i.e. how long the play will take to develop). On 3rd and 10 or more, a pure speed line of Mario, Babin, Amobi, and Weaver (unless you wanted to try Kalu on the inside) could be amazingly effective. In shorter situations, either Babin or Kalu at one end, with a bigger middle (Maddox/TJ, perhaps?) probably makes more sense.³

Regardless of the rotation, having Jason Babin continue to play like he has so far this season would go a looooooong way toward developing that front-four pass rush that our defense (most notably our secondary) so desperately needs. Even better, it will start to make the first-round pick of Babin make sense. “It’s about time,” you say? I agree… that’s EXACTLY what it’s about.

¹ No? How about The Babinator? I like that one.
² Something to keep in mind regarding Mario, too, I suppose.
³ The one thing I don’t want to see, but that I have seen others advocating, is moving Mario inside on these passing downs, with Kalu and Babin on the edges. Ignoring how such a move would make the anti-Mario contingent even louder, it removes Mario’s primary asset (speed) and makes little to no sense in my mind. Plus, Baldinger would run his mouth again.

Ch-ch-changes

Aug 14, 2007 Athletes who don't stab people, Dan The Assassin, DeMeco Ryans, Demarcus Faggins sucks, Morlon Greenwood, Preview, Secondary issues are primary, The Fred, Training camp 2007

Building on my theory that the roster changes by the day, two roster-related moves were made by the team this afternoon. First, 610 reports that LB Charlie Anderson was supplanted as the starting SLB by Danny Clark. “The Assassin” has impressed Kubiak in camp, both in linebacker duty and on special teams, so he’s apparently the man now (dog) at the SAM position.

I like this move. Nothing against Charlie–he showed some ability on Saturday and he plays with a nice intensity–but Clark has some skills. Last year was a down year for him, but he had 129 and 113 total tackles in the two seasons prior to 2006. Plus, I think his size/speed combination alongside what DeMeco Ryans and Morlon Greenwood possess puts us in the position of having one of the most athletic and (dare I say it?) talented starting LB corps in the AFC.

Second, and you can file this under “what the…?,” the team signed Tyrone Poole. I suppose this was to add some depth at free safety. However, I really don’t understand the thinking here. Poole is a converted CB, just like Von Hutchins, and has the added super happy funtime bonus of being 35 years old. He hasn’t played a full season since 2003. In 12 games last year with Oakland, he managed 15 total tackles, 1 INT, and 3 passes defended. Wow.

I understand the idea that Smithiak have had a great track record with bringing guys in off the street (Anthony Maddox, anyone?). Still, I cannot figure out how this move makes sense. If you want to try a converted CB at FS, you have Hutchins. If you want to try an old converted CB at FS, you have Dexter McCleon. If you want to try an actual safety at FS, you have Brandon Harrison, Brandon Mitchell, and/or Jason Simmons. Depth is never a bad thing, but signing some random old guy simply because he had the best workout among some other random out-of-work defensive backs isn’t adding good depth. Even if we keep 5 safeties on the active roster, I don’t think it makes sense to keep Poole over any of the other guys listed here. I hope I am wrong and that Poole checks in with 6 INTs and 50 tackles by the season’s end. Still, I have to think that if he had that kind of Free Safety production in him, he wouldn’t have been eating Cheetos and waiting on a phone call.

UPDATE: There are rumors floating around that Poole will see time mainly at nickel and was signed more in response to the loss of Jason Horton than of Glenn Earl, meaning Kubiak is happy with the Brown/Simmons tandem (or a Brown/Hutchins possibility) as of now. This is good, but it still makes you wonder why we brought him in. I mean, Jamar Fletcher and Fred Bennett are the nickel guys right now (and Faggins should be there). Also, Jason Horton was playing like crap on Saturday, so who even knows if he was long for the team? I dunno. Hopefully the next few days will shed some light on it.

The opposite of intelligent and informative

Aug 10, 2007 Athletes who don't stab people, DeMeco Ryans, Houston Chronicle, Jon Abbate, Training camp 2007

Chron.com has given some fairly good coverage of training camp on a daily basis this year, which is nice. The short info snippets in each daily entry have provided some blog fodder and (more importantly) some nuggets of insight that you probably can’t get without being at practice. For that, I commend them.

But the video in the Day 13 roundup… well, I can honestly say I am dumber for having watched it. Why is Anna-Megan bouncing up and down at the beginning? Why is McClain hugging himself throughout? Why did they spend half the video telling us that they were going to do a video with Jon Abbate? Why are the telling us the same stuff about Schaub v. Carr that we’ve heard for the last two weeks? My head is spinning.

*****
I want to thank everyone who commented on the DeMeco Ryans story, as well as The Big Lead, Roll Bama Roll, and USA Today.com for linking to it. Getting the additional traffic was nice, but getting that story out there was even better. I also want to say that I am disappointed in Matt Mosley at ESPN (I refuse to link) for telling me he was going to blog about it (when it looked like DeMeco had passed up the chance to donate) and then not following through (once it became a feel-good story). I should have known he was only looking for some reason to blast us.

Cold shoulder

Aug 6, 2007 Bad Idea Jeans, Jason Babin, Posts that list too many players, Preview, Super Mario, Training camp 2007

The general consensus is that the starting defensive line is going to be Mario Williams, Amobi Okoye, Anthony Maddox (unless Travis Johnson somehow works his way back in), and Anthony Weaver. Given the players we have to choose from, I suppose I agree with everyone else that this is the best combination for our front four. (Though I still hold out hope for Jason Babin, he continues to be the walking embodiment of “‘tweener.”¹)

Of course, the question mark in this continues to be the health of Weaver’s shoulder². While he has been on the field during practice, Weaver still has not been cleared to participate in contact drills and he certainly won’t be playing this Saturday when the Flying Grossmen come into Reliant.

The thing is, it’s not really surprising that he’s not ready to go. The minimum recuperation time for rotator cuff surgery is 4-6 months. And that’s just when you can begin and kind of strength building exercises. What is surprising is that the team is moving forward as if he will be ready week 1.

What if he’s not? What does the D-line look like then?

N.D. Kalu is behind Weaver on the LDE depth chart, so one could assume that ol’ Ndukwe would get the first crack at it. (Aside: Why do we put two periods in “N.D.” when it’s the shortened version of “Ndukwe?” That would be like me going by M.att.) Kubiak made the comment that, while Kalu doesn’t have the stamina of some of the younger guys, he is one of the better pass rushers on the field in camp. Problem: Kalu is at least four years removed from anything resembling a good season. He also turned 32 a few days ago, so I have my doubts as to any sudden resurgence.

The aforementioned Babin could try the position. Problem: LDE is typically the strong side, meaning Babin would have to deal with the RT and TE. I don’t think I need to explain why this won’t end well.

Mario could move to the RDE spot, with Babin playing LDE. Theoretically, this could work well. I still don’t like it, though, as I think Mario needs to spend all season as the LDE. Plus, Babin has yet to prove that he can beat any OLTs.

There’s always Earl Cochran. He doesn’t have much of a track record, but apparently he’s had a pretty good camp. When asked about players that had impressed him, Kubiak replied, “I think [he] has definitely flashed.” And, we can’t forget about the dark horse, Alfred “Big Pooh” Malone. He’s a big dude (6-5, 308), but I know nothing about him other than there are a couple videos at Chron.com showing him getting reps at LDE.

So what’s the answer? I honestly don’t know. My guess is that Kalu is the starter and Babin or Cochran get snaps there as well. Geez…I never thought I’d be so worried about whether Anthony Weaver was healthy or not.

¹ Other things he seems to be the walking embodiment of: bust, overreaching for a draft pick, and boyband wannabe. Damn it.
² And, to a much lesser extent, his knee.

Kickin’ it in Houston

Aug 4, 2007 Chad Stanley, Matt Turk rules, Preview, Special Teams, Training camp 2007

For fans of most teams, a training camp punter battle would be slightly less interesting than Special Olympic tic-tac-toe. (And way less interesting than a cripple fight.)

Most teams, however, haven’t been privy to the Chad Stanley Experience.¹

How bad is Chad Stanley? Well, a Google search for “Chad Stanley sucks” turns up the following quotes:

Their current punter Chad Stanley is awful. Gardocki awful. Worse really, if looked at more than just last year. (Author’s note: This is from a Steelers fan.)

Chad Stanley? Yikes. This guy was brutal last year. My guess is he isn’t the only punter on the roster come training camp. They are probably (no, hopefully) searching for his replacement already.

This sucks. I’m sorry, Chad Stanley is now a terrible NFL punter. Hopefully this is something we can address with a late-round pick.

Chad Stanley laid an egg.

Even accepting that disgruntled fans are not the most unbiased observers, these quotes coupled with Stanley ranking 29th in Gross Average Yards and 21st in Net suggest that Captain Shank might not be the best man for the job.

Enter Matt Turk. The same Matt Turk who ranked 18th in Gross and 9th in Net last year in St. Louis. Yeah, you could say I’m excited.

Dale Robertson sums up just what Matt Turk could bring to our table.

The Friday morning workout was for special teams only and the punt team became the primary focus of the session. Veteran punter Matt Turk, brought in to compete with original Texan Chad Stanley, dazzled the attending media with a series of crushing punts, a couple of which looked like they were going to bust through the Methodist bubble top.

Rookie Jacoby Jones tried to field one and wound up shaking his hand in pain.

“He’s a boomer,” special teams coach Joe Marciano said. But he didn’t want to start a controversy, quickly pointing out that Turk and Stanley are very different types of punters and should be judged differently. “Chad doesn’t have any 70-yarders in him,” Marciano conceded, “but he’s been very effective in the 40- to 50-yard range, with hang times of 4.5 to 4.8 (seconds). One of those guys will be punting here this year and other one will be punting for some other team. They’ll both be in the league, I guarantee you that.”

Turk missed the 2005 season with an injury but then became “a gym rat,” Marciano said, and now could pass for a linebacker, he’s so muscular. Asked if he’d ever seen a punter rip into the football like Turk does, Marciano replied, “Yeah, last year, when we played St. Louis (in the preseason).”

Turk was the Rams’ punter.

Compare and contrast that with this TexansTV video of Stanley and Turk going head-to-head. Maybe I am just being overly optimistic, but quotes like “we thought it was important to push Chad” and “Matt is a power guy…explodes into the ball” seem to bode well for a Stanley-less future.

Thanks for the memories, Chad. We’ll keep in touch. Don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out, dude.

¹For the uninitiated, watching Stanley has been roughly as painful as a root canal. Performed rectally.

Sure, but what does Anna-Megan think?

Aug 1, 2007 Houston Chronicle, Preview, Super Mario, Training camp 2007

I’ve made no secret of (and taken plenty of flak for) my support of the Mario Williams pick. From real-life friends telling me I was a fool¹ to internet strangers emailing me to ask if I was being paid by the Texans to say that Mario was double-teamed last year², I often feel like I have a harder PR job than Tony Snow.

Of course, unlike Snow³, there is still time for my subject to carve out a positive place in history.⁴ If the preseason talk is to be believed, that’s exactly what Mario is trying to do.

According to Richard Justice, Mario showed up to camp 10 pounds lighter and ready to play one position–right defensive end. Based on how he worked through the offseason, Kubiak and Co. have high hopes for this year and beyond.

‘It was extremely important what he did this offseason,’ Kubiak said. ‘If he wasn’t our best worker, he was up at the top. He has done everything he needs to do. If he keeps working the way he’s working, I think the sky’s the limit. The key to him being a Pro Bowler is how good we get this football team around him. I think we’re headed in the right direction.’

Of course, in typical Justice fashion, Dick also gets in a dig, saying “[t]he Texans surely understand they blew the pick. They’ve essentially admitted that with the change at quarterback.”

But what if they didn’t blow the pick? What if Mario really is as good as we all think (hope?) he can be? He has certainly shown flashes already this preseason. (Bonus: If you watch the video in that link, you get to hear some of Morlon Greenwood’s Jamaican accent near the end. Awesome.)

But although Williams may be lean, he was not mean enough on Monday, according to coach Gary Kubiak.

‘We need to get him mad more often, because he made some progress today,’ Kubiak said. ‘I know Jethro (Franklin) and them were disappointed with his practice yesterday, and they let him know that. He came out here this morning, and he was a different guy.’

As for Franklin, the team’s defensive line coach, he certainly knows that an angry Williams is one scary sight for opposing offenses.

‘I wouldn’t want to mess with him when he’s on the field, that’s for sure, and I get after him every day,’ Franklin said.

Then again, just like Steph said, we tend to look for what we want to see in life. This goes double in camp, I would imagine. John McClain took time away from touching himself on camera to chime in with this entry in the training camp blog.

One day after he looked like Reggie White for a few plays in practice, defensive end Mario Williams suffered a hamstring injury. The coaches pulled him out of practice. Coach Gary Kubiak wanted to make sure that everyone knew it was the Texans’ decision to take out Williams — not Super Mario asking to come out. [...]

The one thing we do know about Williams — other than God gifted him like few others — is that he’ll play hurt. He played the second half of last season with a painful foot injury, despite not being able to practice.

The truth is that Williams is still inconsistent. To get him angry as the coaches did in Tuesday’s practice, perhaps they should play that YouTube video over and over.

Oh, John… you are a funny, funny man. And so full of insight into “the truth.” Of course, if I am guilty of looking only to the silver linings, then McClain is just as guilty of finding the surrounding storm clouds. I mean, he says himself that Mario looked good yesterday and then got banged up today. Getting a tight hamstring has nothing to do with consistency on the field, at least not in the manner McClain suggests. (I realize that preaching logic and cause-effect to Chron writers is likely a fool’s errand.)

So… what now? Well, we are week into camp. Mario has shown flashes of pure dominance. He’s shown moments of lapse. He has been nicked up, just like all the other players at this point. So, I suppose the only conclusion we can reach is that we still have no more insight into how good Mario will be.

What we are starting to see, though, is how good he can be. The good news is that both he and the coaches are working double-time to make “will” and “can” meet, starting September 9, 2007.⁵

¹ Thanks, Ren.
² This actually happened two days ago.
³ Still talking about the White House Press Secretary and not the Informer…a licky boom-boom down guy.
⁴ This ends any semblance of political discussion on DGDB&D. Seriously.
⁵ To make things easier for Mario, let’s also hope that Reggie Bush starts hanging out with Odell Thurman and Vince falls victim to the Madden Curse. Call it hedging our bets.

Houston means that I’m one day closer to you

Jul 30, 2007 Beer, Demarcus Faggins sucks, Jacoby Jones is unheralded, Mexican food, Secondary issues are primary, Self-Referential Stuff, Super Mario, The Fred, Training camp 2007, Vacation-related posts

Well, that didn’t exactly pan out like it was supposed to.¹

I was supposed to spend all day Saturday at the Methodist Training Center; instead, I spent all day at Methodist hospital. I was supposed to see at least three (possibly four) practices; instead, I saw not a second. I was supposed to eat my body weight twice over in Mexican food and brisket; instead, I managed only a trip to Ninfa’s yesterday afternoon before I left Houston.

Which is not to say the weekend was all bad. The First Annual Texans Blogger Symposium and Drinkathon went off swimmingly. Tim and I (later joined by reader Will and his girlfriend²) solved a number of the Texans’ problems.

• We decided that (a) someone should run over Travis Johnson as he crossed the street, even if that means we can only afford to pay league minimum for a third string DT.
• We opined that Jacoby Jones is totally deserving of the mancrush all of us seem to be saddling him with, as we are pretty sure Kevin Walter will never be a viable #2.
• There was much discussion about blogging in general–a topic that I’m sure you can never hear enough about–and how Will Leitch changed everything (and is likely underpaid).
• Of course, there was discussion about the drafting of Mario Williams and, tangentially, the degree to which we love (Tim) or loathe (Me) a certain Titans’ QB.
• Sandwiched between jokes about my feelings re: Petey Faggins, we agreed that our best hope is that Fred Bennett can play CB2 and that, were we in charge, we’d put him there with instructions not to worry about play action–just stay with your WR, son.
• I believe there were at least three T-shirt ideas thrown out, which I am totally going to use. As soon as I remember what they were. They were funny, though. I think.

Other, non-Friday night stuff. I chose Ninfa’s yesterday for three reasons. First, it was the only place that received more than one vote, with Stacy and Tim both chiming in on it. Second, it was a ten-minute drive from the hotel. Third, when a place is described as “legendary,” I almost feel obliged to try it first. Anyway, I ordered the two beef tacos a la Ninfa and Stacy was right–those were the best tacos I have ever had. The salsa verde was awesome. The sopaipilla was excellent. And so on, and so forth.

Three other random tidbits about the weekend before I quit with the self-referential crap and turn to actual developments with the team.

• For lack of a better category, file this following under “Weird Shit. On the first leg of my flight (LR-DAL), seated a mere six rows ahead of me was one Barry Switzer. I still can’t figure out what the hell a former pro coach (who should still have millions in illegal booster money from his college coaching days hidden away in the Caymans) would be doing flying Southwest Airlines. Tim’s suggestion was “probably because they have a lax firearm-screening policy,” which is slightly more likely than my theory of him acting as Michael Irvin’s coke mule.
• Since moving to Little Rock, I have labored under the assumption that no sports radio could be worse than what we have here. Well 610 certainly gave that theory a run for its money. I was listening to drivetime on Friday and was shocked at how little grasp the two dudes had on NFL contracts, money, and suspensions. An entire discussion of Tank Johnson and who might sign him without a single mention of how he had to be signed BEFORE the suspension would take place. Dumb.
• So, that Galleria Mall of yours? Jesus.

¹ Note my finely-honed gift of understatement.
² I am completely blanking on her name, for which I apologize. I do remember, however, that she invented a drink that we named the “David Carr.” It is a not-so-potent concoction of Sprite, grenadine, and gin. It is pink. You can also turn it into the “Sandy Vag” by serving it in a salt- or sugar-rimmed glass.

1408 meets Sloop John B

Jul 28, 2007 Self-Referential Stuff, Training camp 2007, Vacation-related posts, Vomitopia

I didn’t make it to either of the practices today. Not because it rained. Not because I was hungover. But because I spent the entire friggin’ day in the emergency room at Methodist.

The good news is that I do not have Super Aids. The bad news is that I have a horrible sinus infection. Which, according to the doctor, was why I woke up at 5AM feeling like someone was beating the inside of my skull with a nine iron. And, apparently, why I threw up 11 times today. Somehow, this is Petey’s fault; I am sure of it.

While I still hope to go to one or both practices tomorrow, you could say that this trip is not working out like it was planned.

Insert clever title here

Jul 27, 2007 Beer, Sam Adams, Self-Referential Stuff, Simeon Rice, Super Mario, Training camp 2007

I’m just going to come out and say it: Simeon Rice is better than Anthony Weaver. No offense to Weavs, but Rice–released yesterday by Tampa Bay–is just one season removed from a 14 sack campaign. The 33-year-old has posted sack totals of 15.5, 15, 12, 14, and 2 in the last five seasons.

Yes, he had a bad–even by our d-line–season last year, posting only 2 sacks and 18 tackles in 8 games. Rice was placed on injured reserve with a shoulder injury last November, but, prior to that, had missed only two total games in his other 10 NFL seasons. Which is to say, if the shoulder is healed, there is no reason to think that he will play an abbreviated schedule this season.

Of course, that’s a big “if.” Apparently, Rice failed a physical yesterday, which may have been part of the reason he was let go.

But, assuming that “if,” can you imagine what an upgrade Simeon would be? We’ve talked most of the post-draft offseason about how Amobi should remove a little of the pressure from Super Mario. Well, put Amobi and Simeon Rice on the left side (and assume that Anthony Maddox plays like he did over the last few weeks of last year), and Mario will face one blocker almost all the time. One. Instead of 2+.

Now, I will grant you that Simeon was due to receive $7.5MM this season (which also probably figured into his release), so this isn’t going to be a Keenan McCardell no one else wants me hometown sweetheart deal. However, even with all of our dead money and the money we just paid McCardell, we should still have around $6.5MM to play with. And I am reasonably sure that a healthy Rice would sign for the something in the $3.5-4MM range.

SO… yes, I am just rambling. And, yes, this is most likely a bigger pipe-dream than my crush on Sam Adams was. And, true, there is very little to indicate that Smithiak will even pursue something like this. STILL (or “THAT SAID” if you prefer), I claim that I am right about this.

(By the way, and before you ask, I am at the airport and, yes, I have been drinking. Stop looking at me like that. I hate it when you judge me.)

My long Nigerian nightmare is over

Jul 27, 2007 2007 Draft, Amobi Okoye is 20, Gary Kubiak, Training camp 2007, Tremendous Busts

In addition to being 20 years old, Amobi Okoye is now a Houston Texan. (Hat tip to Mark, who continues to make my job easy.) Late last night, Okoye signed a 6-year (voidable to five) deal with $12.785MM in guaranteed money (out of a total $17.6MM).

With that move, everyone who is supposed to be at camp will be at camp, where Kubiak can begin the process of crushing dreams and releasing underperforming players. (Travis Johnson, I am looking at you.)

“Son, when you participate in sporting events, it’s not whether you win or lose; it’s how drunk you get.”

Jul 26, 2007 Beer, Peyton Manning's lovelife, Self-Referential Stuff, Training camp 2007

If you are like me, you don’t really need an excuse to drink. Much like breathing, sleeping, and making jokes about Peyton Manning and Kenny Chesney, it’s just something that you do with surprising regularity.

However, when you do have an excuse, it makes it all the mo’ better. On that note, the world-famous¹ Tim from the universally-known² Battle Red Blog and I are using the simple fact that I will be in Houston as a reason to liberate as much beer from the crush of oppressive containerism as is humanly possible in one night. The details:

What: Drinking.
Where: Char Bar, 305 Travis St.
When: Friday, July 27 @ 8PM
Why: Um… DRINKING.
Who: Anyone who enjoys beer and football³

¹ Relatively speaking.
² In the universe of Houston Texans fans who spend too much time on the interwebs.
³ As an aside, if you don’t like beer and football, you should probably stop reading this and go back to your WNBA highlights and Tina and the B-Side Movement CDs.

There’s a seat for you at the rodeo and I’ve got every slow dance saved

Jul 25, 2007 Mexican food, Self-Referential Stuff, Training camp 2007

While in Houston over the upcoming weekend, I have three goals.
1. See at least three practices.
2. Eat Mexican food.
3. Eat brisket.

Now, as for number 1, that shouldn’t be a problem, seeing as how I have tickets to three practices. (You hear me talking, Mother Nature?!? If it rains, I will cut you. So help me God, I will cut you.)

Because my knowledge of Houston is limited to the inside of Hobby airport, however, goals 2 and 3 require assistance. I have asked some fellow bloggers for input, but I don’t know what to make of the results. They agreed on the best brisket (Goode Co. BBQ), but were incredibly divergent when it came to Mexican food. Like the ones one person liked, the other person apparently thought were crap.

SO… I want some input. Recommend places that will fill my belly with the best Mexican food in Houston. (Also, feel free to offer brisket advice as well.)

Like sands through the hour glass, so go the days of McCardell

Jul 25, 2007 2007 Draft, Batman, Colts Shmolts, Free Agency, Super Mario, Training camp 2007

You know the off-season has gotten long when the “he is… no, he’s not” regarding Keenan McCardell as a Texan becomes daily discussion.

That said, reader Mark¹ points me to this line in the NFL.com transaction log.

Green Bay Packers	Korey Hall signed/draft choice
Houston Texans	Keenan McCardell signed
Indianapolis Colts	Tarik Glenn retired
New Orleans Saints	Robert Meachem signed/draft choice, Five-year contract

So… um… I am going to say that McCardell is a Texan. Though that is subject to change at any point until I see him in uniform.

By the way, how cool is it (from our perspective) to see Tarik Glenn officially retire? (See Stampede Blue for a full discussion of Glenn’s departure.)

Say what you want about how quickly Manning gets rid of the ball or how well he feels pressure or how good the offensive system is at replacing people, but Texans fans (more than just about anyone, I guess) know the true value of a real left tackle. Maybe Tony Ugoh or Charlie Johnson steps up and plays well… but neither of them is Tarik Glenn. And, for that, Mario Williams is exceedingly happy.

¹ And can I just mention how much I love readers who alert me to stories? They instantly become my favorite people in the whole universe for a solid 15 or 20 minutes.

Zac Woodfin, we hardly knew ye

Jul 24, 2007 Batman, Preview, RB free-for-all, Ron Dayne likes pie, Training camp 2007, Undrafted Free Agent watch list

Remember way back on July 10th, when the Texans–to much fanfare, I might add–signed LB Zac Woodfin? Nevermind, kid. Woodfin was released Monday along with FB Cory Anderson, G Atlas Herrion, C Enoka Lucas, CB Derrick Roberson, RB Darius Walker, and P Eric Wilbur. (Herrion was also with the team less than two weeks.)

Of these, I suppose the only true surprise is Walker, if only because we kinda sorta actively pursued him. Walker was close to signing with the Bears before, depending on who you ask, he either couldn’t come to terms with the Super Bowl losers or we swooped in and signed him first.

Then again, I don’t know that you can even call his release a surprise. As of right now, you have Batman and Cartman occupying spots one and two. That leaves Lundy, Taylor, and Gado fighting for two spots (assuming we keep 4 RB like last year). Surely Walker–and, more importantly, his agent Drew Rosenhaus–are smart enough to realize he is not likely to supplant TWO guys who have shown flashes of talent in the NFL (a description that applies to all three). It wouldn’t surprise me at all if he asked to be released.

Lucas, Anderson, Roberson, and Wilbur were all part of the herd of undrafted free agents we brought in back in May.

*****
As to news of additions, it seems we brought in P Matt Turk. Which I am sure has the guys at BRB thinking of happy, Stanley-free days.

*****
Amobi Watch: Still no news.

UPDATE: Someone who would have occasion to know such things echoes the sentiment that Walker probably asked to be released, but adds “Walker’s not good, but you’re right [in thinking] he asked to be released. That said, I would be shocked if he made a roster, let alone play a down in the NFL.”

The same person also said that both Manchild and JJ will sign before camp, but “it could be as late as Thursday.”

All or nothing

Jul 23, 2007 Free Agency, National Media, Preview, Rumors, Training camp 2007

Reader Dan points to this article by Redskins Insider Jason La Canfora (picked up by Rotoworld) regarding Keenan McCardell. According to La Canfora

[I h]eard the veteran WR has agreed to terms with Houston, as expected. The Skins had some serious interest in him, but only at the right price - the [veteran minimum]. He lives in Houston and if he was going to sign anywhere for that kind of money it was going to be there.

Now, I have not yet been able to verify this report, but I am inclined to believe it. After all, dollars being equal, why wouldn’t he sign with us?

Assuming the veracity of said article, what does this mean for the Texans?

McCardell joins the logjam at WR2, but I have to think he is going to be given the first best chance to win the job. Just looking at the raw numbers over the last five years, however, I think one has to temper his expectations of what McCardell can do. Best case scenario, we are probably looking at 65 catches, 850 yards, and 7 TDs. Worst case scenario, he resembles Eric Moulds, circa 2006. Unfortunately, at least for planning purposes, each of those scenarios is as likely as the other.

We can argue all day long whether McCardell is the right guy to “teach” Jones and Walter how to be starting NFL receivers. I suppose it depends on what level of instruction you are looking for–if you mean “show them some tips and tricks for playing at this level,” then he can do that in spades; if you mean “take them under his wing and groom them to replace him,” I don’t see Keenan going that far. What he will bring, though, is a higher level of competition for the WR2 position. I get the feeling, just from McCardell’s quotes around the time of his workout that he sincerely plans on making the team and starting all sixteen games. (Sure, maybe it’s just to pad his career numbers, but it’s better than just signing for a paycheck.) This means that Jones & Walter & Apostrophe & Anderson & Bethel & Adams & Mr. Glass are all going to have to work that much harder to make the team.

Speaking of making the team, the Texans broke camp last year with 5 WRs. If they take that same number this year, who are the odd men out? Johnson is in. Jones is in. Walter is likely in. Which means you have 5 or 6 guys competing for 2 spots. My guess is that Apostrophe and McCardell round out the squad.

Ever intrepid, I’ll keep looking for some sort of confirmation of this rumor. You can click here for DGDB&D’s discussion of KMc.

UPDATE: I emailed Carmine Pirone and Nicholas Scurfield of houstontexans.com and asked about the rumor. Pirone’s response was a simple “Not true.” So–for now, at least–there you go. Somewhere, Apostrophe Davis just relaxed a little.

Camp Kubiak

Jul 23, 2007 2007 Draft, Inanity, National Media, Preview, Training camp 2007

Maybe it’s because I am writing this blog and searching (mostly in vain) every day for something worth writing about, but this offseason has seemed oppressively long. I’ve seen glaciers move more quickly.

Slow or not, however, the end is nigh!

Rookies have already reported for “indoctrination”–which sounds ominous, but likely isn’t–and actual camp begins in earnest on Friday. Saturday and Sunday each feature two practice sessions open to the public, of which I will be attending 75%. I spare no expense when it comes to you, the loyal reader.¹

If last year’s camp is any indication, camp will be hot,² well organized, and pretty up-tempo right from the opening bell. We’ve gone over the positional battles repeatedly here, so I won’t rehash them, but I am hoping to get a little insight into “Who’s Now” at some of the key positions. (I would also like to understand exactly what “Who’s Now” means, but that’s a different story.)

*****

In other “camp is almost here” news, the teams has still not reached an agreement with Manchild or JJ (or Brandon Frye). This is not bad news as of right now, but it merits watching as this week progresses. The Raiders have stated that J-Rock is close to signing, which would make it easier to slot everyone in after him, so I’m still guessing that Amobi is signed by midweek.

Also, I was flipping through the Preview issue of Pro Football Weekly, when something curious caught my eye. They predict the Titans to go 6-10, despite giving their QB, RBs, and WRs grades of B, D, and D+ respectively. By my math, that’s a GPA of 1.74. The Texans, whom the magazine says will go 5-11, have grades of C+, B-, and C+ at those positions. 2.66 GPA. Interesting. Even if we include the offensive lines (B- and C-) in those grades, the discrepancy only closes to 1.91 for the Titans and 2.24 for the Texans. What about the defense? 2.22 for the Titans (C, B-, C) and 2.66 for the Texans (C+, B-, C+). Pardon me… but how the hell does this many any sense?

¹ This is a total lie. I just wanted to go to camp. Still, you kinda benefit from it.
² Unless, of course, The Weather Jesus decides that he wants to keep raining on Houston, in which case the public viewing will be canceled and I will have to hurt someone.

Kasey Studdard is not Amobi Okoye

Jul 21, 2007 2007 Draft, Amobi Okoye is 20, Jacoby Jones is unheralded, Training camp 2007

The Texans have reached an agreement Kasey Studdard. And, like nearly every other article you read about him, the linked entry says he “plays with a mean streak.” What the hell does that even mean? Does he pinch opposing linemen? Take his opponent’s mother out to a nice dinner and never call her again? Maybe one of the Longhorn fans can fill me in.

So, with Studdard in the fold, we have lowered the number of non-signees to four. Unfortunately (at the moment), that foursome includes the two guys who are going to get a whole lot of playing time. No disrespect to Brandon Harrison or Brandon Frye, who both stand a good chance at being number 2 on the depth chart at their positions, but I will rest a little easier once Manchild and JJ are signed.

Update: As Tim points out, Harrison signed about 5 hours after this post went up. I have magical powers.

With the first pick in the 2029 NFL Draft…

Jul 20, 2007 2007 Draft, Chocodiles, Non-Texan stuff, Self-Referential Stuff, The Fred, Training camp 2007

Some random Friday Texans nuggets while I let it sink in that my wife is pregnant.

• The Texans have inked draft picks Zac Diles and Fred Bennett. With rookies scheduled to report to camp on Sunday, expect a flurry of deals in the next 48 hours.
• Texas.com has a breakdown of the three TEs. Nothing overly newsworthy in there, except that it appears all three are healthy and ready to contribute to the team in slightly different ways.
• Single game tickets are now on sale. The Titans game and the Saints game reportedly sold out in minutes. I have no idea why…
• Not so much “breaking news” as just really cool and helpful, USA Today has a searchable NFL salary database.
• Finally, I just wanted to mention that I will be in Houston around 6PM next Friday. Somewhere in between the three practices (note: if any of those three are canceled, someone dies), I’d like to meet up with readers/fellow bloggers/non-serial killers and have a beer or thirty. An Astros game is also doable if anyone is interested.

Gary Kubiak is going Thunderdome at strongside LB

May 23, 2007 Gary Kubiak, Lance Briggs' open invitation, Michigan Wolverines, Super Mario, Training camp 2007

As is generally the case with young teams, several positions are in flux as OTAs and minicamps begin. With the Texans, there is competition for WR2, LT (until Charles Spencer returns), KR/PR, CB3 (nickel), and–apparently–SLB.

This year, the Texans are giving [Charlie] Anderson another opportunity to become a starter by pitting him against Shantee Orr at strongside linebacker. Orr, who has started the past two years, has had to battle for his job every offseason.
[...]
Orr is athletic with pass-rush ability. In the 3-4 alignment in 2005, he set a team record with three sacks in one game and led the Texans with seven total sacks. Last season was Orr’s first in the 4-3, and he was rarely used to blitz. [Author's note: That was a mistake on Kubes' part.] He finished with 1 1/2 sacks and 32 tackles.

Anderson, who signed a one-year contract in the offseason, is a talented athlete who is waiting for his first start after three seasons with the Texans. He has 36 career tackles, many of which have come on special teams.

I am on record as being an Orr fan. I liked him at Michigan, I like his motor, and I think he makes the perfect 5th rusher in this defense. With him behind Weaver and Manchild, you create a great opportunity for (a) one of those three to get free and (b) the opposing RB to be occupied with that side of the line, thereby ignoring Super Mario.

Still, the coaches have apparently seen something in Anderson that they dig. If there is one knock on Orr, it’s that he is less than stellar in pass coverage/zone awareness. Maybe Kubiak has seen something that suggests Anderson would be the better all-around LB. I dunno. Anderson is four inches taller than Orr and slightly faster, so that might play into the decision as well.

In the end, I think that Orr will win the starting job. However, if Kubiak is not going to blitz from the Sam position very often, Orr’s contribution is going to be significantly diminished. In that case, I would mind them going in a different direction and seeing what Anderson can do.

Either that, or see if Lance Briggs is interested in wearing battle red.